My smile is unexpectedly weird. A couple months ago I received a letter from Big Life Insurance Company informing me that they’d been trying to find me (I am not hard to find, geniuses), and they believe they have, so would I please verify? The issue is that I have a whole life policy they need to keep up to date.
Being a writer, naturally I first wondered who is planning to murder me?
Why else would someone buy life insurance on me? I’m not a high-earner who is supporting peeps who’d be cast adrift upon a sea of bankruptcy should Yacht Paula hit an iceberg.
So, I called BLIC to find out what was going on. Welp, it turned out that my policy was purchased in June of 1979, making it look suspiciously like a high school graduation present. (A strange one, agreed. But family, amirite?) But alas whoever bought it quit paying the premiums five years later, which lined up with my Grandpa Jack’s death, so it’s been an ourobouros policy ever since. Which means that it’s been nomming up the value of itself to pay for the yearly premiums (around $600) and it will continue to do so until it expires in the year 2027, or unless I die first. The day I called, my beneficiary was due to get about $5K if I hit the iceberg.
And who would that be?
My ex-husband. What? Why? I must have known about this policy at some point and updated it, and then it completely slipped out of my mind again like a boring snake. Or maybe my parents did when they settled Grandpa’s estate? Idk. So, I asked for a change of beneficiary form. They said they’d send one. But in the meantime, I received a different form with my address confirmed and on that there was a number that said cash value. Wait, what? I can cash this dumb thing in?
I called BLIC again and asked for the cash-out form. They said they’d send it. I waited. No form. I called again. Spoke to a snotty woman who acted like she personally was going to have to pay me the money. Not my problem! Do your job please.
In any case, I got the form and filled out four (4) pages of gobbledy, sent that back, waited. Last week I received a check for $900 and change. Woohoo! Not a fortune, but it was a surprise and a welcome one.
Thank you, Grandpa Jack. 💖