Tag Archives: twitter

We Donโ€™t Want Him

Nicholas Sparks is trending because he refused to accept an LGBTQ ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ club in the Christian school he founded and there’s some ongoing litigation yada. Apparently part of the case has been settled, and he has the legal right to be intolerant, so that’s cool. I more or less support keeping it legal for private clubs to arbitrarily let in and keep out whom they please, as opposed to landlords, employers, public schools, etc. (Whether they should get tax breaks is a different issue.)

Just because something is legal however doesn’t make it good or right. It’s also legal to cheat on your wife. But that’s not what I came here to discuss today. If you don’t already know, Nicholas Sparks is a writer, a hugely bestselling writer. His books have been made into movies. You’ve surely heard of The Notebook? Well, there you go.

In the frenzy to bash Sparks, people have been conflating his books with romance novels and dumping on the whole genre. Now, I don’t mind bashing Sparks ~ I made a yucky ๐Ÿคฎ face on Twitter myself. I can’t stand his sterile prose ~ and that was before I knew he was super religious. Now my review of Safe Haven from 2013 makes a lot more sense.

But let’s be clear: Nicholas Sparks is not a romance novelist. He says himself he isn’t one, and he is correct. He writes general fiction (“love stories”) with romantic elements. It’s an important distinction, peeps! To be a romance novel, a story must have a Happily Ever After ending. If you want to bash the genre, go ahead. If you want to rag on Sparks, for his politics or his writing or both, have at it.

But please don’t lump Nicholas Sparks in with romance novelists. Cuz that just pisses me right off. ๐Ÿ˜ก๐Ÿ’ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ He’s not welcome in our club. On the whole, you will find the protags in romance novels to be a tolerant lot, or they become tolerant as the story progresses.

I note that in The Daily Beast article I linked in my first sentence, Sparks bags on the whole romance novel genre because he’s a stupid ass who has read none of the books he’s criticizing. Romance novels are not about “the taming of a man” ~ if anything, they err on the side of misogyny, even though they are written largely by women and mostly from the POVs of the female protagonists. What they are, are fantasies of what it would be like if an alpha hero fell in love with you and wanted you more than anything on this earth, and indeed would do anything on this earth to make you his own. And he succeeds. That is what romance novels are and why those of us who love them, love them. โค๏ธโค๏ธโค๏ธ

Sparks can stick with his yawningly vanilla pudding Ken-doll heroes because there is obviously a market for bland safe smooth love too.

^^^ The sexual excitement level in a Sparks’ novel goes from zero to pudding.

Surprised by Stats

As I’ve said, I don’t obsess over stats, here or on Twitter. If I did, I’d drive myself (more) bonkers. But I do find certain things peculiar.

Forex, I’ve been steadily and slowly gaining blog followers, which is nice (waves to new peeps, who probably aren’t reading), but yet my views have decreased. Is that not odd? I find that odd. More followers should mean more views, one would think. Luckily, I do not monetize my blog, so I won’t be losing any advertising pennies over this. Hurrah!

I never go granular and try to figure out when the best time is to post to get the most views because… I simply can’t be bothered. I try to remember to spread out my posts a little, except when I forget and just hit publish instead of schedule for later. Oopsy.

Some posts get 20 likes and others get 50. Why? Who knows! Is it because a post is especially “good” that it gets more likes, or has a more eye-catching photo attached? Idk. I’m as surprised as what people like and don’t like here in Blogville as I was back in the murky, scaryland of dating sites.

But, as has been noted many times by me and others, liking often has little to do with the content of a post, amirite? Bloggers power through their feeds when the mood strikes, mass-liking stuff without reading any of it. We can tell, can’t we? It’s only a group of us who regularly read each other’s work, plus some occasional drop-ins.

Monday I wrote a poem on Twitter that now has 42 likes, which is nothing for that place, but a lot for me. Usually my poems there are lucky to get 4-5 likes. Why did that one get 10x more? Who knows?!

My Social Media Ranked

Although this reminds me of a game of pool, it’s actually a fun prompt from John Holton: rank your social media from most to least favorite.

(I was going to do them all, including ones I never had, by saying something funny. But then I realized my funny things weren’t funny, so now I’m just doing ones I know.)

1. WordPress, best SM site by far. I love to blog, simple as that. Love to write stories and poems and also jabber on about whatever at any length. Love that it’s easy to delete stuff as well, find other bloggers, comment, block commenters, and have a way of tracking comments elsewhere. Love the supportive camaraderie here and the vast variety of interests. Love how easy it is to create a new blog and keep it private, as I did for NaNoWriMo.

2. Blogger. Welp, if I didn’t have WP, I’d use Blogger, as I used to, and it would be fine, though not as fabulous. I’d still get to blog though, which is the main thing. The nice thing about Blogger is it’s connected to my Gmail and other Google products. It never seemed as glitchy as WP, but to be fair, WP has more features.

3. Twitter. I like Twitter for the poets and the poetry prompts. I get inspired there at times to write different sorts of poems from here. I’ll read some news too, but I stay out of the flames. It’s all the same crap I’ve seen forever on the internets. ๐Ÿ”ฅ

4. Yahoo. Talking about the “old” Yahoo now. I deleted my accounts, including my Flickr, after their massive hack. But I have fond memories of the old Yahoo, where you could find new people to chat with in their groups and on their Messenger service. It wasn’t all hookers and spam then. Please excuse the nostalgia moment.

5. YouTube. This is a good free service for music and music vids. I don’t use it to listen to hideously annoying speeches or self-help garbage promo or political ranting. Gahhh! But I use their app several times per week to link to vids for music prompts and such.

6. G+. RIP. It was a good idea that never took off. I tried to participate off and on, but peeps couldn’t tear themselves away from the FB monster. One feature I lurved there was their filtering ability ~ you could easily make some posts and photos private to family or certain friends without others knowing they were excluded. ๐Ÿ˜ข

7. Messenger. More FB nonsense. I have to keep it in order to chat with certain people who don’t like texting. It annoys me hugely, but wheee see Paula compromise. At least it can stay hidden, unlike FB itself, where every time you comment to a friend, one of their idiot friends picks a fight with you. ๐Ÿ˜ก

8. Instagram. For me, IG was a relatively harmless time-suck. I only posted photos of Gatsby, food, sunsets, etc. But it’s connected to FB (see below), and more importantly you’re contributing to the insane consumer body image culture just by being on there. I deleted it with FB in March of 2018.

9. SnapChat. When I was on, it was indeed snappy. Now, I guess it too has been hacked and people are saving photos they should not. But I didn’t send risquรฉ photos; I was using it for fun, not for flirting. I found it stupid and pointless though and deleted it after a couple weeks. ๐Ÿ’ค

10. DropBox. I found this annoying. Maybe I wasn’t using it right, or maybe you have to pay to unlock the best features. But I didn’t see the point. I can use Google docs or just text/email stuff. Do people chat on here? Not sure why it’s in the “social” pile.

11. WhatsApp. Another FB product, one that allegedly doesn’t compromise your privacy. Lol! Hey, I have a bridge for sale, interested? I used this for a while, meh. It wasn’t as convenient as Messenger, and now I have negative feelings toward it cuz of this one dickhead I was on last with.

12. Facebook. Horrible place that sucks out your soul while stealing all your data. Then they apologize and do more of it. Again and again. So glad I’m out of there permanently. Yes, I miss the handful of nice people I used to interact with, but hello I am right here. They have my email and phone too. It’s their choice to become strangers to me. ๐Ÿ˜›

Mystery Blogger Award

Rory, of A Guy Called Bloke, has gifted me with this wonderful award to brighten up my morning. Thank you, Rory! I must say that Rory is among my favorite bloggers ~ he really makes an effort to draw our little community together by posting a variety of super fun interactive games, stories, and linked events. He also makes the rounds of his followed favorites regularly, and not merely to drop likes (guilty) but to leave meaningful and funny comments. I’ve found many other great bloggers via his links and games too because he makes an effort to introduce us to one another. Not least, Rory is a fantastic storyteller! I love his poems and his creativity. I don’t know how he finds the time for so much writing; and today I learned he plays WoW too? My gosh. He must never sleep! ๐Ÿ˜‚

Award Guidance

Thank whoever gifted you and include a link to their blog. โœ…

Mention the creator of the award and provide a link as well. โœ…

Tell your readers 3 things about yourself.

1. I put my novel Ghosted on hold, since it made me too stressed to keep failing to progress on it. Not to mention that once it’s done… so what? It’ll sell about 10 copies like all my other books, so why bother?

2. I’m in chronic pain, which gets me down at times. Not everyone has the cheery TV pain personality and focuses on their “blessings” every minute.

3. I suppose I should write something upbeat so I don’t sound like a horrible crab… errr, my cat was healthy at his last checkup, yayyy! ๐Ÿฑ๐Ÿ’–

Answer the questions from the person who gifted you the Award.

Rory posted a video of skeletons and things dancing in a graveyard and asked…

Would you do the above dance naked on the rooftop for a cookie?

No.

Why Not?

Because I don’t want to get arrested.

You would? Really? Why?

N/A.

Ok, how about for 1000 in your currency?

Still no.

Ok, how about for a 100,000 in your currency?

Okay. I’ll pick the rooftop and let you know when I find one sufficiently deserted.

Choose 3 bloggers that you wish to gift the Award to.

I choose all bloggers who haven’t yet received a mystery award. YOU ARE TAGGED!

Ask 5 questions of your choice with one weird or funny one.

1. Are you still using Facebook?

2. Why or why not?

3. What about Twitter?

4. Add me on Twitter? @lightm0tifs

5. Why do we have to take all the tea in China and dump it in the deep blue sea just because “she” is as sweet as Tupelo honey???

Notify those you gift the Award to.

YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE! ๐Ÿ˜›

First World Problem

So, I stayed in bed extra long this morning because it was around 27 degrees in my apartment and I didn’t want to brave the frozen air. My cat seems to be super energized by the cold though. He’s so weird. Anyway, my phone battery finally lost all charge, at which point I got up.

Took a hot shower, had hot tea, yada. Now my phone was charged a bunch, so I sat down to deal with things again, but half my apps didn’t know me including WP. Fine whatever. Logged in, etc.

But when you re-log-in to the WP app, it doesn’t behave like other apps. The Gmail app, forex, will have your draft emails. The Twitter app keeps your saved stuff. But WP? Nope. All my saved searches and posts were wiped out. This is why I have no FOWC, WOTD, RDP, etc. Sure, I could go find them again, but meh.

I also read an article today about detoxing from your phone. I thought, welp, this is a good start, since I lost my prompts and am now forced to work on my to-do list. I got a lot done. There’s always more though. So much more.

I’ve also been reading depressing articles about selling books via Amazon. Might have to rethink where I want to sell my next one. Every good thing gets ruined by greed and scammers. ๐Ÿ˜ข

Hope everyone is having a good Saturday. I’m going to continue to slog away. Posts have been scheduled ~ enjoy! ๐ŸŽถ

Tuesday Noodles

From Rory and Doodle Pip…

Is Social Media Ruining Genuine Friendship & Encouraging More Loneliness?

Actually, I think it is and isn’t, depending on the person and circumstances. Genuine friendships can be ruined by lies and gossip getting out of control on social media in ways that didn’t use to happen. By the time you have a chance to catch your breath, everyone and his brother have weighed in on your personal situation. It’s crazy! And it can make apologizing and one-on-one conversation nearly impossible after things have spiraled into the public or even semi-public arena. Sometimes it feels easier just to walk away from a friendship than to deal with an entire tree of Facebook harpies on top of the original problem.

On the other hand, some of us who have felt isolated and relatively friendless because of whatever reason have found communities of like oddballs online (or even one or two others who grok our special weirdness), and this has been such a blessing, for lack of a less loaded term. What a freaking relief after all these years to “meet,” even if only on a screen, another human who has experienced some of the same shitty things we have. Someone who gets our strange sense of humor. Someone who aligns with us politically. Who collects blue crystal spiders. Or believes life began on Neptune. Whatever! There’s someone somewhere who we can discuss this with, and odds are good it won’t be our next door neighbor or someone at work, but probably someone in another state or country.

With our one weird friend in our pocket, we can now go about our daily life faking normalcy without feeling so all alone.

But! Because we have the weird friend or two, and the ability to find more tailored friends online, it’s so seductive to ignore meatspace people who don’t get us, which is pretty much everyone. And since online friends tend to ghost or take breaks sans explanation, sometimes you’re left feeling even emptier than before.

Why Do People Bully Others?

Insecurity. Yep. This is textbook bullying, mostly by men who are “losers” according to cultural standards, but online they have the ability to hurt others, especially when they clump together in a bropod.

Avoid Own Problems. For sure. I think many of us Usenet “combat prose warriors” were in avoidance mode. I was. It was an escape from my home life, and I’m sure I wasn’t alone in that. We were all spending waaay too much time there to have healthy offline relationships.

Look Cool. Maybe. I guess in partisan politics anyone who bashes a Trump supporter looks cool to other Trump haters and the same goes for the other side, but I’m sick of it all.

For Fun. Absolutely. There’s this thing on Twitter called “hate-following.” Like if you hate Trump, you don’t block him or mute him, but instead you follow him and mock his tweets and anyone who supports him. He doesn’t read the comments or engage, so it just makes him appear to have more followers. Counterproductive! Also, why would anyone waste their time doing this? It must be fun!

Which Stigma/Taboo Is Worse?

Mental Health. Is this even a stigma? Seems like everyone is claiming to have a disorder nowadays from being “on the spectrum” to OCD (guilty) to whatever else.

Self Harm. This is sad and scary, but so many have fessed up to it that it doesn’t seem like a stigma either.

Suicidality. This is scary to me, such that I would constantly worry about being close friends with someone who had these thoughts, since I’d feel like I would need to be on high alert. Maybe that turns it into a taboo, if people are scared of it. But you have to be. How can you not be, if you care about someone?

Bullying. People who bully are assholes and should be shunned. This should be a taboo. It isn’t though. The POTUS is a bully and enjoys a solid chunk of support from his base. Same with other politicians and celebs. We secretly like them, don’t we? Maybe we’re genetically programmed to because we want a bully to protect us from the terrors outside the cave. Even those of us who can’t stand Trump want someone tough and mean enough to beat him, don’t we? Cuz if we choose Molly Milquetoast, she will lose.

Do You NEED People In Your Life? How Many People Do You Meet With & Talk

1-3 per Day

4-9 Per Day

10-17 Per Day

18+ Per Day

I laugh at those numbers, especially the last one. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ Mine is zero, as in none. Depending on the day, I have 1-3 coworkers I talk to, but I don’t think that counts, since it’s work-related. Maybe twice a month I attend a social event with around a dozen people. I see my daughter and her husband and baby once a month. I try to have one weekend day every weekend where I don’t leave my apartment at all, and one weekend a month that’s completely for me/no events or plans with others.

That said, I don’t feel alone. There are people I talk with almost daily; I just don’t see them in person. This doesn’t bother me at all. I try to imagine if I would be happier seeing more people and the answer is no, always. The opportunities are there if I want them. I used to think I needed to explain why I am this way, but I don’t. Nor do people who like to go to parties and interact with others frequently need to explain. It’s simply how we’re hardwired.

Apology please, with a cupcake ๐Ÿง [rant! bothsidesy! ackkk]

Like many, I often judge hastily, when I should know better by now. I was noodling around on Twitter this past Saturday when everyone began freaking out about the MAGA hat kids vs the drummer guy. Since I dislike the President and MAGA apparel, my sympathies went immediately to the drummer.

After a while I learned that the drummer is a known activist, not that there’s anything wrong with that ~ he’s a peaceful activist, as far as I can tell ~ but someone whoโ€™s used to confrontation nonetheless. He seeks out attention for his causes, as do all marchers and activists.

The MAGA boys were in town for a pro-life rally. Is there anything more uplifting than to witness a bunch of rowdy privileged prep school boys telling grown women what their healthcare options should be? Here’s my thought about what to tell teen boys who are opposed to abortion: never have sex with a female. That way, no unwanted fetus creation can be directly attributed to you.

Next I learned that the people who actually sparked this entire kerfuffle belonged to a third group, Black Israelites. I had to google them to find out what their dealio is. They were apparently insulting the MAGA kids, who responded by going into their tribal Catholic school dance, as you do, and the Native American group, headed by the drummer, felt like getting in on this action.

So, my new view of this incident is a big eff them all. No one deserves an apology except for me. Why me? I shall explain. ๐Ÿ˜€

During this craziness, lunatics on the left decided that the MAGA hat boys were the most evil things on this earth and should be doxxed and destroyed because they were smirking. Omg smirking! Nothing was off-limits… people began sifting through every scrap of info they could find and leaping to conclusions about identities.

Naturally the school principal and all the teachers’ names were made public. They’re all white and certainly horrible racists ~ we must obviously assume. I mean, Kentucky, eh? If it seemed like a studentโ€™s name was found, good enough! Go ahead and blast it all over, hit the parents, siblings, any colleges that accepted said monster, workplaces, etc. Kids were smirking at a Vietnam vet, so fair game, amirite? You know the left luvs them some Vietnam vets.

Except for one teensy thing. The lunatics misidentified at least one person and made his life hell. This is where your apology to me comes in (you know who you are). If it wasn’t for the insane proliferation of anonymous online accounts all over Twitter and FB, it wouldn’t be so easy to dox and destroy people with an army of trolls. If everyone had to use their real name when acting like a self-righteous jerk online to “out” strangers for smirking in a video, and whatever else, things would be way different (better), imo.

Iโ€™ll take my apology cupcake in the form of lemon cake with coconut frosting, thanks!

Confession, shameful but not short

I’ve had a lot of coffee, so I’m in the mood to jabber on. And on and on. Some of this may be confessional, some may be rantacious, I just don’t know at this point how it will all go. I already see I’m creating new words and doing grammar incorrectly, which may bother some readers.

Some tweeps were taking umbrage at Justice Democrats, so here’s the confession part of my post (there may be more, dunno yet): until I wiki’d last night, I didn’t know this was an actual thing. I told you I’ve been reading less news! Now, of course I’ve heard the term, duh, but I thought “justice” was simply an adjective, sometimes appended sarcastically, to certain young, progressive Dems, such as AOC, who attack established Dems instead of focusing on Republicans. How embarrassing. Not that I actually said anything to embarrass myself (until now), but just that I’ve been bopping along, thinking I know what’s happening, when I really don’t have a clue.

Some of you super savvy political types may not want to associate with me now, and I can understand that. It’d be like an alleged fan of romance novels fessing up that she never heard of The Flame and the Flower. (It wasn’t a rape scene! Go away.)

What else did I plan to babble about? Oh, my novel. So, I have 17 chapters written, all fabulous because I’m a massive egotist, and they take place in 1996. I only meant to give a small taste of what happened back then, and immediately swoosh back up to 2016, but so much is important, I’m discovering. I really want the reader to understand why my protag made a choice because it’s not something most people would agree with if simply told about. I want people to grok the intricate relationships between my chars, not just say welp they had a bond from 20 years ago, just accept that. Nope. Gotta show how it developed. Upshot is my novel is gonna be longer than I expected.

But the thing is, the supernatural element is only very mildly present in 1996, and idk if it’s cool to go 17 chapters without having it play much of a part (actually 18 because I’m not done yet), and then when we’re back to the future in 2016, it’s woowoo time. Maybe readers won’t accept this. Maybe I need to make 1996 more woowoo, to be consistent. Personally, I am not a big fan of inconsistency, unless it’s good. Bwah!

But I don’t want a bunch of ghosts in 1996, so whatever. It is what it is. I’ll just make it work! Speaking of fails… I see I have not managed to smush “quest” into this giant pile of [crap, garbage, trash], which makes me sad because I don’t like to do a prompt post unless I can use five prompts, with the exception of a poem or one of those story things. You might call this an endless quest for meaningless consistency.

Or you might not.

Change of Mind

Recently my thinking on an issue has evolved, and I thought I would share it here. It’s semi-political, in a way, but relatively non-partisan. It has to do with how celebrities are treated, whether they are in the entertainment industry or well known political peeps or whomever.

In the past, I basically dgaffed. My view was that, for movie stars especially, they became famous by seeking the spotlight, so live by the sword, die by the sword. I had no patience for their bitching about the paparazzi. The exception was Princess Diana, but, still, was it a photographer’s fault her chauffeur drove like a maniac?

That was a long time ago, and before celebs were on twitter along with their stalkers. Same for politicians, etc. It’s really not a solution to say “get off social media.” I can, since I don’t actually have a writing career. But a politician can’t. An established author must have an online presence. Actors are probably told the same. Etc.

They are not only relentlessly mocked and harassed, but also impersonated to an insane degree. This goes far beyond the annoyance of having some shutterbug snap a photo when they’re trying to relax at a resort.

The other day a singer I follow on Twitter, Rosanne Cash, had her entire account recopied word for word, photo for photo. That account then followed me. My first reaction was hey neato Rosanne follows me now! But I looked more closely and figured out it was a fake. I reported it, and Twitter deleted it.

Why do people do that? To begin setting up scams. Most likely after fake-Rosanne amassed enough followers she’d begin flirting with some men, tell them she wanted to chat offline, and hit them up for money for whatever thing. They’d send money by PayPal and she’d disappear.

My reporting fake-Rosanne will probably accomplish nothing. She’ll try again. She’ll choose a different celeb. I reported another fake account a while back and it too was deleted. Twitter does take action ~ it also will get rid of those awful antisemitic Q accounts too if you report them. But there are so many that it’s hopeless.

I feel sorry for celebs now. Some actors like Scarlett Johansson are victimized by “deepfake porn,” videos that make it seem like they are really acting in porn movies. The technology is so good that these creeps can superimpose faces on other women’s bodies and apparently you can’t tell the difference. No one should have to put up with that in the name of “free speech.”

It’s all because of this idiotic idea that we should be able to access the internet anonymously and thus be completely unaccountable for our behavior. Get TOS’d? No problem. Make a new anon gmail and begin again. I’ve said before that I’m against anonymous speech and there are only more and more reasons piling up why it’s a bad thing. My view is we should have one ID, from say a fingerprint, that follows us everywhere online, no escape from our words and behavior.

No worries, you can still be a creepy troll… but everyone will know who you are right away. The nasty stalkers will still be able to dog their fave celebs and politicians all over Twitter in the name of free speech, and they can still be obnoxious and crude in the comments on Fox News, but we will know who they are and where they are the second they hit send. That will most likely make a lot of these jerks have second thoughts about blurting out their vile spew. Neither “little people” nor stars should have to put up with this continual harassment.

Fandango Made Me Do It

I thought I was gonna get away with just one post today because it was that long FTS thingie, but now Fandango accused me of saying his prompts aren’t fun, which I did not! If he still believes I did, I’ll issue a politician’s apology: please forgive me if you feel offended.

Now that I’ve bothered to begin more jabberish, I may as well shovel in the rest of the prompts. I hope you’ll all show me the proper amount of gratitude for that.

You may have noticed I’m spelling post the normal way. Getting bored with lolcat. It’s been a while. The dogs bark, and the circus moves on. (Look it up.) I don’t like to get too predictable, too trapped into a pattern of behavior. That stifles creativity.

As part of my recovery, my reclaiming of my time and my own goals, I have not been Ms. Hospitality. I can’t be. In order to do all my paying work, take care of my health, and focus on my writing, I’ve had to cut back dramatically on entertainment. I no longer go to movies or meetups. I don’t date or chat on FB. I don’t watch the newest stuff on Prime and Netflix. I accept very few social invites and issue even fewer. Etc.

I do, however, blog and tweet, since I find both of these communities conducive to writing. I was going to join a book club, but that didn’t work out, which is probably for the best. I do try to read a few books per month, except for November when I NaNo. Because family is everything, they get priority… but luckily they’re mostly too busy for me!