Tag Archives: sleep

I Think It’s Tuesday #PoiMe

Pointless meandering

Warning: this is not gonna be one of those smell the flowers in the pandemic posts, but there are plenty of those around, so if you would rather read something cheery, move along now.

I’ve been doing my side work from home as usual but not my main work. It would be complicated to set up. The days blend in a haze of sleeping late, sweatpants, coffee, news, news, and more news. 😢

It’s depressing to live this way and never see any of my favorite humans. I don’t know when I’ll be able to visit my daughter up North again. Or even see my family in Los Angeles. Everything seems terrifying. But I’ve been staying indoors mostly and not even going for walks. I don’t like getting the mail because I never know if someone will stand too close. Today was okay. No one was at the mailboxes when I was.

The worst thing is reading these constant bits of news and feeling more horrified. But I need to know what’s happening! I live near a busy street and traffic never stops whooshing by… where are they all going? Why aren’t they staying home like they’re supposed to? Aren’t they hearing the same stuff I am? 😡

I’ve been cleaning a lot. I have nothing else to do but keep checking the mishmash of news. I read a book. Probably will read another. Been chatting with friends. I was gonna bake banana bread, but no one else is around to help me eat it, so I didn’t. No need to turn into a chubby hermit. Got bored with the phone games. I’m finally working on Ghosted. 👻 Luckily, I really like it.

I am grumpy and sad. I don’t find the beauty in this. Maybe if I had a partner? Then we could be having luscious sex and engaging in wonderful deep conversations and playing chess and watching lovely old movies and making lasagna and planning our escape from this mad mad world, but instead I just keep checking the cat boxes to make sure no poop needs to be removed.

It’s not that I mind being alone. I like to be alone. It’s the forced aspect of it. And it’s the constant uncertainty in every direction. Health, family, finances, job, future. What’s going to happen? Even if things tentatively begin to improve, will we be re-whomped with this, or a new version, next winter?

Sorry, I can’t put up some Hallmark card type of post. This really sucks. 🙁

~*~

Image originally from Pixabay.

©️2020 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Purry Good [socs]

Stream of consciousness Saturday

I used to worry about how yelly my kitty was. Just my luck… someone who can’t bear repetitive sounds to end up with a cat who howls like a wolf, right? Migraine alert! 🐺

I made up a joke for him. Gatsby, I would say, why might people think you’re from Idaho? He’d say maow (why?). Because you are a noisy Boise! I would laugh and laugh. He mostly did not. 🐱

But a funny thing has happened. G and I moved to a new apartment last week and the windows face a pool and spa, not a parking lot full of stray cats. They also have shutters that can be completely closed at night, unlike my old place. The upshot is that Gatsby has been sleeping all night without yowling at the windows. This also means that I get to sleep at night! ❤️

Oh, he still meows and expresses himself, not to worry! He’s the same energetic ball of furry adorableness he ever was. And he’ll bite me as I’m getting ready for work… Mommy, don’t leave! 🥰 Moving has not dimmed his light. I actually find him more lovable now that he’s quit shrieking (hopefully for good)… amazing how that works.

~*~

Image credit to Shelley Krupa

©️2019 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

“Thou art a worry to thy friends” [SOCS]

Linda told us to grab the closest book, open it, and put our finger on a page ~ this would be our Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt. Mine is the quote in the title, which is on page 64 of Tortilla Flat by John Steinbeck, a used paperback I picked up at an exchange a while back but haven’t read yet.

Honestly, I’m not really inclined to read the book now, given the annoying dialog on this page, and the names of the characters (Pilon and Pirate). I feel it well within my rights to make such an arbitrary and snap judgment because I have an enormous pile of books to read, and more come in all the time. I’ll never get through them all before I die, so why not cull them in any manner whatsoever?

May sucked as far as reading. I began a few books and lost interest, played games on my phone, read a lot of blogs and news, and was basically a scatterbrain. I need to get more focused now. Today I deleted my phone solitaire games that I play when I can’t sleep, and which probably keep me from sleeping too. Duh. I could spend that time reading. It’s less stimulating as far as keeping me awake like a game. But to be fair, I have dozed off in the middle of a card game, though not often. Maybe once.

I don’t think I’m a worry to my friends. I’m very sensible and predictable, at least that’s how I’m perceived. Reliable. Dependable. I can be counted on to do a thing if I say… which is also a curse, you know? Because unreliable people always get a break. Hey, no biggie if Joe didn’t show up… we know how he is. And oh there goes Janet again, such a wild and crazy gal! But me? If I mess up or don’t show, everyone is all but you said!!!

Eff that. Why can’t I be the wild one once in a while? But it’s not me, I know. I like plans. I schedule everything. I’m on time, or early. I reply. I’m considerate. Bla bla bla. Boring! I’ve even tried to plan my own funeral. I want one of those I Dream of Jeannie urns. I want to have coconut cupcakes and a song list. Hotel California, of course. New Kid in Town. Those Shoes. Tequila Sunrise. End of the Innocence. And a lot of Neil Diamond. Jimmy Buffett. Fleetwood Mac. Supremes. Sheryl Crow. Gordon Lightfoot. Johnny Cash and Rosanne Cash. But that’s a bit too planny.

Maybe.