Tag Archives: peevery

Migraine Awareness Month

It’s past the midpoint of June, so I thought I’d mention migraines again. I’m aware of them every month, but it’s nice they get a special one.


Image is from Migraine.com.

I’m one of the “lucky” sufferers, in that I can generally get almost full relief from the standard migraine Rx medication. But the unfortunate part is that I get so many migraines even with twice a day meds as a prophylactic. I also get regular tension and sinus headaches too, plus have chronic tinnitus. It’s a wonder I can ever write a word, but you do get used to things.

I admit it gets me down at times. I’d like to accomplish so much more. I’d like to not feel tired and blah from medication. I wish I could have more energy for writing and playing and exercising and living. But I simply do not. Sometimes just making it through another day at the office is a minor miracle. And we’re not even talking about backaches here, only head pain!

Migraine is a disability. Not that “normal” headaches can’t be horrible and crushing. I know they can. I had a persistent sinus infection in 2005 with the most horrible accompanying headache and face pain I could barely stand it. But when I finally got the correct antibiotic ~ poof! ~ all gone. But the migraines do not disappear; I only get temporary relief between attacks. But thank science/research/doctors for that relief!

Speaking of doctors, for a long time I didn’t have the proper treatment for migraines, but in the last 20 years I’ve lucked out and found good doctors here in Orange County. In particular, two doctors have given me excellent care and they are primary care physicians not specialists.

Sunglasses are a huge part of my life, unlike so many other things that I’ve had to give up. Bright sunlight is a trigger for me as well as flashing lights, persistent noise, alcohol, smoke, perfume/cologne, harsh odors, etc. Sometimes stress/anxiety will start one, but not always.

I try to keep in mind that others may be also suffering from hidden disabilities when they are slow or make mistakes. It’s doubly difficult because not only am I a naturally impatient person, but often when I’m not feeling well I just want to get home where I can suffer alone. Anything that slows me down enrages me. But anyone else might be in that same boat… not to mention the fact that I too can be spacey and prone to (more) errors when in pain and on meds. Which is… most of the time, lol.

I also try not to get angry when people try to do their “smile and be grateful” thing. Be grateful for chronic pain? Yeah okay. I’m grateful it’s not worse. But that’s bad too, since I’m comparing myself with others and my gratitude is at their expense. I’m terribly sad about all the people who have worse migraines. But maybe that’s how the S&BG types cope with their issues, so okay.

Now, I realize this post is going to generate comments asking me if I’ve tried wacky migraine remedies. Always happens. I try to preempt this by stating I am under good standard medical care and am not a fan of anything off the path. But people will do their thing. 🙄

Okay then. Migraines suck. Bottom line.

So Shall Me Me Me [SOCS]

Social is not an adjective people would apply to me. Then again, I’m not exactly antisocial either. I go to game nights and other peopley events nearly every week. I’m not a shy soul ~ I’ve done stand-up comedy. But I can’t bear huge, squashy crowds, like malls at holidays or giant indoor concerts. I hate feeling trapped up next to people… but I’m not claustrophobic because I don’t mind being in small spaces if I’m alone. In fact, I much prefer a tiny cozy room to the scary emptiness of a vast open field. And I do need a significant amount of alone/quiet time simply to “recharge” my emotional batteries. I can’t be around other people jibber jabbering night after night!

Speaking of people, I’ve believed for some time that social media has made us less social. I know that sounds contradictory, but hear me out. First, we’re buried in our phones 24/7. You hardly see anyone’s face when you’re in public. Gone are the days when you made idle conversation with someone waiting at the store or DMV or doctor’s office, etc. Why would you talk to them and interrupt whatever they’re doing on their phone?

Second, supposedly we’re all connected to so many more people now than ever before due to technology, but how many of these friends inside your phone would actually, physically help you in an emergency? Who, exactly, would you call? Yeah. I know. Me too. It’s basically down to a daughter who lives 40 miles away and another friend I had before social media and possibly a few others. But none of my twitter/blog peeps, even though we “interact” daily, would be on that list. Used to be, I made more of an effort to say hello and chat with neighbors, but why bother now? I have bloggy and twitter friends! 😂

Third, in the olden days, what did you do when you felt alone with your odd ideas or interests? Maybe you found a kindred spirit, if you were lucky enough and looked hard enough, and then you could happily share your weirdness. Or you decided to try to acclimate to a more mainstream hobby in order to have friends. Is that so bad? Instead of finding another freak to assist you in pulling off butterfly wings, you joined a bowling league. But now in the age of social media, you don’t have to compromise and go bowling to have friends. You can stay home and hang out with a few dozen wackos in a chat group from other parts of the world who also enjoy torturing butterflies.

I don’t think that’s better! Some interests should be suppressed. Some people shouldn’t be able to find each other. God only knows what horrible things people are discussing right at this moment… whatever you may imagine, I guarantee that it’s worse.

This will be yet another one of Paula’s Unpopular Opinions. 😜

We Don’t Want Him

Nicholas Sparks is trending because he refused to accept an LGBTQ 🏳️‍🌈 club in the Christian school he founded and there’s some ongoing litigation yada. Apparently part of the case has been settled, and he has the legal right to be intolerant, so that’s cool. I more or less support keeping it legal for private clubs to arbitrarily let in and keep out whom they please, as opposed to landlords, employers, public schools, etc. (Whether they should get tax breaks is a different issue.)

Just because something is legal however doesn’t make it good or right. It’s also legal to cheat on your wife. But that’s not what I came here to discuss today. If you don’t already know, Nicholas Sparks is a writer, a hugely bestselling writer. His books have been made into movies. You’ve surely heard of The Notebook? Well, there you go.

In the frenzy to bash Sparks, people have been conflating his books with romance novels and dumping on the whole genre. Now, I don’t mind bashing Sparks ~ I made a yucky 🤮 face on Twitter myself. I can’t stand his sterile prose ~ and that was before I knew he was super religious. Now my review of Safe Haven from 2013 makes a lot more sense.

But let’s be clear: Nicholas Sparks is not a romance novelist. He says himself he isn’t one, and he is correct. He writes general fiction (“love stories”) with romantic elements. It’s an important distinction, peeps! To be a romance novel, a story must have a Happily Ever After ending. If you want to bash the genre, go ahead. If you want to rag on Sparks, for his politics or his writing or both, have at it.

But please don’t lump Nicholas Sparks in with romance novelists. Cuz that just pisses me right off. 😡💥🔥 He’s not welcome in our club. On the whole, you will find the protags in romance novels to be a tolerant lot, or they become tolerant as the story progresses.

I note that in The Daily Beast article I linked in my first sentence, Sparks bags on the whole romance novel genre because he’s a stupid ass who has read none of the books he’s criticizing. Romance novels are not about “the taming of a man” ~ if anything, they err on the side of misogyny, even though they are written largely by women and mostly from the POVs of the female protagonists. What they are, are fantasies of what it would be like if an alpha hero fell in love with you and wanted you more than anything on this earth, and indeed would do anything on this earth to make you his own. And he succeeds. That is what romance novels are and why those of us who love them, love them. ❤️❤️❤️

Sparks can stick with his yawningly vanilla pudding Ken-doll heroes because there is obviously a market for bland safe smooth love too.

^^^ The sexual excitement level in a Sparks’ novel goes from zero to pudding.

Laura’s Music Challenge 17

Hurrah! More music! Join Laura’s weekly tuneful challenge and have some fun. I tag you and you!

1. Post a video of a song that makes you think of your youth.

2. Post a video of a song about having had your fill of bs. (This should be interesting)

3. Post a video of a song about being unapologetic for standing your ground.

So, all these songs are by men. I wanted to have songs by female artists, but the only one I really liked (that I could think of tonight) was Nancy Sinatra’s “These Boots Are Made For Walking,” which I’ve already posted a bunch of other times. It could fit in category 2 or 3, I guess. But even so, all the women look super sexy in that video, which dilutes the message. I mean, that is how the videos are by women. They sing these songs about how they are just done and so over it/him, and they sound sincere, but they still look like they very much care about attracting him or some other him/s.

Because they’re just songs. They don’t necessarily reflect the singer’s state of mind, attitude toward life, relationships, or any other thing. In fact, as we know, very often the person singing the song isn’t even the person who wrote the lyrics. There may be a woman singing very passionately about how horrible men are yada… and the song might have been written by a man. Maybe it was written by her husband and they’re very happy together. Why shouldn’t she look sexy in her video while she sings that she’ll never love again?

So, I just went with the men, which makes me mad, but what can you do? 🙄

(Sorry for babbling on and on, assuming anyone has read below the fold.)

“Thou art a worry to thy friends” [SOCS]

Linda told us to grab the closest book, open it, and put our finger on a page ~ this would be our Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt. Mine is the quote in the title, which is on page 64 of Tortilla Flat by John Steinbeck, a used paperback I picked up at an exchange a while back but haven’t read yet.

Honestly, I’m not really inclined to read the book now, given the annoying dialog on this page, and the names of the characters (Pilon and Pirate). I feel it well within my rights to make such an arbitrary and snap judgment because I have an enormous pile of books to read, and more come in all the time. I’ll never get through them all before I die, so why not cull them in any manner whatsoever?

May sucked as far as reading. I began a few books and lost interest, played games on my phone, read a lot of blogs and news, and was basically a scatterbrain. I need to get more focused now. Today I deleted my phone solitaire games that I play when I can’t sleep, and which probably keep me from sleeping too. Duh. I could spend that time reading. It’s less stimulating as far as keeping me awake like a game. But to be fair, I have dozed off in the middle of a card game, though not often. Maybe once.

I don’t think I’m a worry to my friends. I’m very sensible and predictable, at least that’s how I’m perceived. Reliable. Dependable. I can be counted on to do a thing if I say… which is also a curse, you know? Because unreliable people always get a break. Hey, no biggie if Joe didn’t show up… we know how he is. And oh there goes Janet again, such a wild and crazy gal! But me? If I mess up or don’t show, everyone is all but you said!!!

Eff that. Why can’t I be the wild one once in a while? But it’s not me, I know. I like plans. I schedule everything. I’m on time, or early. I reply. I’m considerate. Bla bla bla. Boring! I’ve even tried to plan my own funeral. I want one of those I Dream of Jeannie urns. I want to have coconut cupcakes and a song list. Hotel California, of course. New Kid in Town. Those Shoes. Tequila Sunrise. End of the Innocence. And a lot of Neil Diamond. Jimmy Buffett. Fleetwood Mac. Supremes. Sheryl Crow. Gordon Lightfoot. Johnny Cash and Rosanne Cash. But that’s a bit too planny.

Maybe.

In Other Words, compliment…

“They” say you’re supposed to ask for what you need,

But whenever I did, the excuse train came chugging down the track;

“They” say you’re supposed to model what you desire,

So I gave praise and said sweet nothings,

But I never heard a single compliment back.

~*~

Prompt from Patricia

More from Rory

Today’s topic is ………….. Conversation Starters

How much did the polar bear weigh?

She refused to say.

What was the last funniest film you saw on the big screen?

Wow, I had to do a biggie search to find this. It was Book Club, a year ago,when I first started the now-dead Movie Pass. The rest of the films I saw with MP were dramas or musicals. Or movies that were supposed to be funny, but weren’t. I’ve seen funny movies since then on TV, of course.

What do you think of tattoos – do you have any?

Some are okay on other people, but I don’t have any.

If you are wasting time, what is your best way to achieve this with 100% success?

Phone games.

If every time you walked into a crowded room a piece of personal intro music played, what would yours be? [Provide a link please]

Who is your favourite celebrity? [Why?]

Ruth Bader Ginsberg. Because she’s brilliant and dedicated to doing the right thing. Also, she drives the rightwing nuts bonkers. Bonus!

Are you an organised person or live by the chaotic theory?

Organized.

What are 6 annoying habits other people have?

Chronic lateness, tailgating, running stop signs & red lights, speeding in general, jabbering in elevators, being huge fucking hypocritical liars.

What time do you normally retire for the night to sleep?

Midnight lately.

When was the last time you pulled an all nighter?

I never do this. Maybe back in college.

When you go out, what is the one thing you simply cannot leave home without?

Keys. Gatsby won’t unlock the door for me if I forget them. 🐱

Physical books or Ebooks which is your personal favourite to read and own?

Ebooks. Physical are a waste of paper and space imo.

During a number two trip to the toilet, how long are you in there for?

Not very long.

What was the most interesting news story you have seen this week?

That the reason cats fuss when their bowl is still half full of food is cuz they don’t like when their whiskers touch the sides of the dish.

Why was it interesting?

Because cats, duh. 🐱

Where was the worst place you have ever been stuck for longer than an hour?

On the road to Northern California on July 4th, 2013 without air conditioning in my car.

If you were going to change your name, what would your new name be?

“Anonymous Mega Millions Winner”

What is the silliest fear you have?

My fears are not silly! 😛

What is your guiltiest pleasure?

The coloring app.

FPQ25: Nowhere & Poof

Fandango provocatively asks…

“Where do you believe you were you before you were born and what do you believe will happen to you after you die?”

He answers the question himself by saying “I do have a position on where we were before we were born (nowhere, we didn’t exist) and what happens to us after death (poof, we’re gone and no longer exist).”

That’s also what I believe, and I can’t state it any more clearly than “nowhere” and “poof,” which is why I copied his words.

This shouldn’t be a provocative question. If others believe that there’s a supernatural realm with souls floating around that attach and detach to human bodies (and idk some good doggos?), why do they care if Fandango and I disbelieve it, and vice versa?

But it’s a big farooking deal.

I believe that the most important things are what we do right now, how we treat people here on earth, how we care for animals and the environment, etc. But there isn’t any payoff. I’m not going to be rewarded in heaven for not being a litterbug. So, why not throw garbage on the street? Why care that the ocean is a toxic dump? Because this is our home, and keeping a clean home is an end in itself. I don’t need a gold sticker like a three-year-old for doing the right thing.

No, this isn’t actually a tangent. People who get it will get it. 😛

More Things I Hate

I see it’s up to me to break up the syrupy brunch of Mommy Day posts full of flowers and pancakes and goopity goo, mm yes please I would like another mimosa hold the OJ thanks…

What was I saying? Oh! Yes, things I hate. Let’s start with slide. No, I’m not talking about those things in the park next to the swings. I’m talking about the absolutely enraging expression “it was a slide into the DMs.” If you haven’t been living under a rock, you know that this is the stupid way young people describe encountering one another privately on a social media site for romantic/ sexual purposes.

In other words, he sent her a message.

For fuck’s sake. We already have normal words like message, text, and email. We don’t need this idiotic slide thing. It drives me bananas.

Next up is drop. This is a word we use in its appropriate sense all the time as in these examples:

1. He drops women after three dates.

2. Don’t drop the baby, Grandma!

3. I dropped the package off at FedEx.

In the past, we had a perfectly good word to describe the action of an artist releasing a new piece of work, whether a song, album, book, painting, etc. We used the word release, in fact! But now these irritating people are using the word drop just to annoy me.

“My single dropped at midnight.”

It sounds like code for a spy operative. “The dog didn’t bark?”

“No, he was poisoned by the double agent.”

“Funny, I thought you were the double agent.”

“Well, actually–”

😡😡😡

Even more things I hate coming soon!

Denial

Alyssa tweets that we should deny sex to protest strict abortion bans, and while I am Pro-Choice, her idea is wacky. Only women who believe the same will be on board, and most of them are already with like-minded men, so we’re punishing men who agree with us? Not to mention the fact that sex shouldn’t be used as a prize. Plus the fact that the anti-sex people couldn’t be more thrilled. 🙄

~*~

Via Sammi