How’s your sex life?
At first, I wasn’t going to answer because the answer is non-existent and Mr. F said he wanted more details (nosy!). Then I thought, OK, I can revert to form and go into a rant about dating, etc. But that’s so boring, not to mention depressing. Plus, almost 4 years have passed since my last date, and longer since my last sexual relationship, so it’s no longer relevant.
I consider myself asexual. I’ve lost interest in it all, and, more importantly, I’ve lost interest in trying to be interested. There was a time when I thought I should keep searching for Mr. Right (now) because, um, why? I don’t even remember why it was ever important to me. Probably a self-esteem thing, like it helped me feel good about myself when some random idiot found me sexy. Seems so stupid now.
The more time passes, the less interested I am. Maybe it is a “use it or lose it” thing, idk. It’s also age, hormones, and not feeling good physically. Well, the last two are still age-related, so maybe it’s just… I’m old! Now, before people start in, I understand that folks way older than 60 still have vibrant sex lives. That’s great! But I’m not them.
For me, the idea of sex was connected to love and foreverness. I disliked the casual way many men approached romance, and it was completely unappealing to simply engage in the physical act without any emotional connection and the possibility of a long-term relationship happening. I’ve done it, just to see, and it made me feel bad afterwards.
I consider my loss of desire a blessing, tbh. Since I’ve given up the idea of finding someone, I’ve been much less stressed. I no longer have to worry about being attractive to whatever man stumbles onto my dating profile, nor do I have to live in fear of one of them stalking me in anger after I reject him (this has happened, and more than once). I have accepted that I’m not good at finding or maintaining a romantic relationship, and that’s that. It’s a big relief to be done with it all.
Sorry I didn’t have much to say about this topic. 😂
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