Sunday at the Maul [rantish]

Yesterday, after having a fabulous pizza lunch with my dear friend at a lovely restaurant literally a few steps from my apartment, I had the bright idea to go shopping at South Coast Plaza. Let me explain! I reasoned that all the exciting deals would be starting on dreadful Black Friday, so I could browse in peace the weekend prior to the madness.

Wrong! Wrongety wrong wrong wrong. I can admit when I’m wrong, and man I was wrong with a side helping of wrongola.

But once I was there and had been driving around for 15 minutes looking for parking, I wasn’t about to change my mind and give up. Nope. At first, I searched the lanes methodically, banking on my good parking karma as a considerate driver, but that got me nowhere, so then I cruised around haphazardly until I found an empty space, which happened to be at the butt-end of Saks, but hey… good exercise, amirite?

After entering the maul itself, I made a beeline (whatever that is) for the spot all the way on the opposite side where I had a vague memory my favorite baby store Gymboree used to be located. Yay, it was still there! Boo, it didn’t have anything I liked. But Baby Gap was right next door, hurrah! They had a super cute outfit! But no matching booties. What? Can’t buy a footless baby outfit sans matching sox! The horror.

I readjusted my bearings to the shambles of the reality of the maul and the fact that I’d have to navigate it. Good gawd it was stuffed with people! So many people. There was a snow house dealio, so naturally all the people with kids needed to pose around there. It was too crowded for me to see if a Santa lurked within. People without kids were also posing. Selfie time! Not me, obviously. Ever since I quit Facebook and Instagram, I’m amazed at how few selfies and pics of food I actually need.

I made a silent vow: I would not leave the maul sans my holiday gifts. No way was I enduring this torture without a payoff. I didn’t need that many, mostly just the baby stuff. Eventually, I found it at Macy’s, which was having the most incredible pre-sale sales, even for those of us lucky enough not to be burdened with the misfortune of having a Macy’s credit card (world’s worst T&C’s).

I was going to regale y’all with the side story of how I managed to find the ONE THING not on sale at Macy’s: a black bra. But this poast is already so long no one in their right mind is going to read it. Not to mention I have two prompt words left here on my Post-It and I need to use them, but they don’t go with a bra at all.

On the way out, I just happened to pass the jewelry department and discovered that some of their sterling silver was 75% off. Now, this was just crazy! I began to look at the earrings and found a pair with created opals. I used to be turned off by the idea of “fake” stones, but now I think they’re not only better deals than genuine stones but more ethical purchases besides. Anyway, these lil opals were soooo colorful and sparkly, and now only $10! So, I bought myself a treat. I don’t consider a bra a treat. That’s more like… tires.

Okay then. Done with the maul for another year or 10. So much nicer to order online or go to cute little shops that are out of the mainstream.

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Mugging It Up

Mugs. I like mugs, OKAYYYY? Mugs are great, and not just for the obvious like tea or coffee, though I am drinking coffee out of one at the mo. It may sound like lunacy, but I like having soup and cereal in a mug (not together, derp) ~ much neater than a bowl. I also like ice cream in a mug, especially if it’s trysting with Bailey’s. Mmmbailey’s.

I like unique mugs, such as the ones pictured above. Two are from my daughter: the giraffe in the back and the Chicago one from a HS trip (it has a grammatical error though, lol). The one that says “Fran” my mom bought on a vacay to New Mexico. The silly zoo one I filled with pens and whatnot was also my mom’s. I bought the pink cupcake mug on a trip to the Huntington Gardens in San Marino. I also have a few boring but serviceable mugs that came with my set of dishes from Target.

Note that we’re not talking about dainty lil teacups you set out with fancy cookies for when the duchesses come to visit. Pffft. We’re talking mugs, people.

You might think that 10 mugs is enough for a person who lives alone like a hermit, but I don’t. I asked for more for Christmas (Chanukah really, but I wanted to use the prompt).

So, there you have it. Mugs! 😜🤪🙃

Many Are Called…

A thousand and twenty-seven thanks to the lovely Blokey Guy for nominating me for a Liebster and for coming up with a set of clever questions. I am going to attempt to answer these while waiting in the jury pool at OC Superior Court. Hopefully my battery will last and I won’t get interrupted to listen to some pesky case.

RULES

Acknowledge the blogger that gave it to you and display the award. ✅

Answer 8 questions that the blogger gave you. 🆗

Give 8 random thoughts about yourself. ⚠️

Nominate 8 other bloggers and notify them of their nomination. ❌

Ask your nominees 8 questions. 🌀

Questions for Me

1. Are you happy with the person:
i] You are
ii] You were
iii] You think you will become?

I’m okay with who I am now and I’m always trying to do better (by my standards). Going by the past six months, I’m encouraged with my progress, in particular exiting FB and devoting more of my free time to real writing instead of pointless jabber.

***

2. How many colours can you see in the image below, list them in detail.

Zillions! Heliotrope, lavender, amber, shamrock, black, mauve, azure, turquoise, stone, violet, magenta, white, spring green, rust, burnt sienna, etc.

***

3. Is there anything within five feet of where you are currently typing that is a permanent feature and motivates you to explore your mind deeply?

No. I’m in a huge room, full of prospective jurors, and around me are chairs and tables that could easily be moved.

***

4. How many vices do you have and of them which are your worst?

This may sound conceited, but I’ve pretty much eliminated all vices from my life over the past couple years. The worst thing I do is not get enough exercise.

***

5. How curious are you to new discoveries, and first time experiences even if they are possibly dangerous or risky for you to try? As in will you try them, or make an excuse not to?

I avoid risk as much as possible, though I still have to drive a car in SoCal. I don’t need to make excuses to get out of trying dangerous things ~ I just say no.

***

6. If you answered No Way to question 5, what prevents you from doing so?

Migraines, back pain, finances.

***

7. If you answered YES Please to question 6, what motivates you to take those risks?

N/A

***

8. What type of song do you think our banjo player here is playing? Provide a link to what you think it might be as your answer to this question.

https://youtu.be/w_lCi8U49mY

***

My Random Thots, in which New Questions are Hiding🐍

6. I’m reading Incognito by David Eagleman and it’s fascinating. What book has fascinated you lately?

2. I may have the slightest touch of synesthesia because I perceive numbers physically, sort of as a quilt. What do you perceive differently from “normal?”

4. I used to have eidetic memory, though it was never perfect. It’s faded with age (as it’s supposed to) but occasionally happily surprises me. Do you have any tricks to help you remember things?

7. A bowl of mac & cheese costs $8.50 in the court cafeteria here, which is ridonkulous, so I bought a protein bar instead. But now I haz a craaaaving! What are you craving?

1. I gave up Facebook this year. A complete and total FEXIT (including Instagram & Messenger). What unhealthy habit have you recently dumped, or are working on giving up?

3. At the beginning of the day, a funny guy described how it would be to work on a Grand Jury and now I wanna do that for a year (or more, if allowed) when I retire. What new experience has suddenly grabbed your attention?

8. I’m happy that my daughter and her fiancé are driving down from NorCal in December and the whole little fam will be together for a few days. Do you have any special plans coming up?

5. I think Gatsby is the cutest kitty ever. Do you agree? Yes or duhhh?

Now for the tricky tagging part. Pay very close attention! Since I’m doing my civic duty and waiting in the jury pool here all day long, in honor of that, and our Constitutional Rights, every blogger reading this who has a J in any part of their real name or their bloggy name… is hereby tagged. J for Jury, hurrah!

Light My Fire [CFFC]

This week’s fun challenge from Cee is all about light. 😎

Painting lighthouses with the fam.

Chanukah lights.

Early morning light.

Sunday Song Lyrics: Soul

For this week’s prompt, I debated between Jewel’s “Save Your Soul” and Train’s “Soul Sister.” It was a tough choice because I love both songs so very much, but ultimately I went with Train. I chose their album Save Me, San Francisco to listen to in my car, full blast up and back to Berkeley on repeat in late 2012 to visit my daughters. It was a mixed year for me personally with big ups and downs, but that trip filled me with joy. My girls were doing so great, successful and happy, and all the songs on that album were super inspirational to me. I left at 4AM to beat the traffic on the first part of the journey back to SoCal, cruising out on the 580 in the perfect darkness, all alone on the road, just me and the music.

Everything is different now. My car broke down on a subsequent visit north when it was about 150 degrees on the Fourth of July and now I only fly up there. I really don’t even enjoy driving at all these days, though I still love Train. Only one daughter lives near SF now; the other lives in LA. I no longer have wild ups and downs, just steady blahs, which is better.

Hey, hey, hey
Your lipstick stains on the front lobe of my left side brain
I knew I wouldn’t forget you, and so I let you go and blow my mind
Your sweet moonbeam, the smell of you in every single dream, I dream
I knew when we collided, you’re the one I have decided who’s one of my kind
Hey soul sister, ain’t that Mr. Mister on the radio, stereo
The way you move ain’t fair, you know!
Hey soul sister, I don’t want to miss a single thing you do, tonight […]

Written by Amund Bjorklund / Espen Lind / Pat Monahan; 2009

Playing with Time

Writing in wordbursts for NaNo has already helped to clarify something in my current story. At first, I thought I’d go back and forth chronologically. I begin with a phone call alerting the protag to her brother’s death. Then I go back 20 years to when her brother introduced her to her soulmate. Then up I go for the funeral. Then back to loverboy. Up, back. I assumed I’d continue this format to the end even though it’s unwieldy.

But noooo! It’s confusing. And possibly annoying to the reader. I had an epiphany today. When I go back the first time, I’m gonna stay back and finish the whole love connection dealio, then pop up to the present where everything gets tangled into a ginormous ghostball.

As I said, I’ve no desire to edit. I conquered that danger by poasting my writing in a secret blargh. No editing. Nope. All good. (Biting edity fingers.)

Tools [CFFC]

At first I thought I couldn’t participate in this photo challenge because I don’t have pics of any of those guys I dated.

…

But then I remembered the otter kind.

I had to buy this to install my license plates almost two years ago. That was the first time I ever did it, or bought a car by myself. I’ve always been terrified of doing things, maybe because my mommy didn’t think I was good at doing anything other than schoolwork, but as it turns out… all is fine.

This isn’t a diss at my mother. I love her and miss her every day. Especially today because I need to clean my ceiling fan light again and change one of the bulbs.

Sunny & Share

A Guy Called Bloke nominated me for another Sunshine Award! I can only assume that I’m getting all these awards lately because I’m just so gosh-darned cheerful and upbeat all the fricken time. The hills are alive with the sound of meeezick! 🎶

Okay, so here’s the dealio. I’m busy. I work all day and then have a part-time gig and also NaNo. I don’t wanna schlep around tagging peeps, copying links, poasting rules, and coming up with new questions. If you wanna play, just have at it. But if the blog police come around, we don’t know each otter, capice? 😂

That said, I like Rory’s weirdass questions, so I’m gonna answer them.

1. What’s the most fun you have ever had without being under the influence of something or someone?

– Probably when my daughter and I took a quick trip to Seattle and serendipitously found a Chihouly glass garden near the Space Needle and also had incredible sushi (back when I was still eating it).

2. What’s the most fun you have ever had without the obvious, naked?

– Professional massage (almost naked). Love love love them.

3. What’s the most fun you have ever had whilst under the influence of something or someone?

– That one time when a lying liar apologized for being a narcissistic asshole and I got confused or took too many meds or something, so everything was sublime for a very short time, until I had to face reality once again. The end.

4. What’s the stupidist question l have ever asked of you?

– You packed the parachutes, right?

5. What’s the question you want to answer but no one yet, even me has not yet asked you?

– Will you please take this cursed $100M fortune off my hands?! 💰

6. What’s your suggestion for the Christmas Challenge?

– Everyone send gifts to me. I will choose my favorite and write a poem about it.

7. What is the craziest blog you have ever read, and l don’t mean mine?

– That mime guy’s. Couldn’t understand a word he was saying.

8. What is the theory of what is?

– Que sera sera.

9. What is the colour red when mixed with Tripping the Light Fantastic?

– Pistols at dawn.

10. What is the answer to the Dodo, like seriously why?

– Mimi tutu.

11. And finally, what is the answer to this riddle?

– Base two.

I Put the Lie in Liebster

Big thanks to Kristian for the award! Loved his answers. 😀

RULES

• Acknowledge the blogger that gave it to you and display the award
• Answer 11 questions that the blogger gave you
• Give 11 random thoughts about yourself
• Nominate 11 other bloggers and notify them of their nomination
• Ask your nominees 11 questions

The origins of this award are as follows:

“This award is meant to encourage new bloggers. From The Global Aussie: “The earliest case of the award goes as far back as 2011.  Liebster in German means sweetest, kindest, nicest, dearest, beloved, lovely, pleasant, valued, cute, endearing, and welcome.”  The award initially focused on bloggers with less than 2000 followers, but as its popularity increased this number has gone down to 200.”

My questions from Kristian:

1. If someone were to make a film/movie about your life, which actor would you like to play you? Joan Cusack. People have said we look alike, and maybe I’d get an intro to John.
2. If you had to stand up and sing a song at Karaoke what song would you choose? Already tried to sing Bang Bang with someone and goofed it all up.
3. If you received a plane ticket through the post that could take you absolutely anywhere in the world, where would you go? Back to NorCal to visit my family.
4. You are trapped in a mountain hut in a snowstorm. You have all the food and drink you need but there is no TV. What books would you like to have with you? All the romances I haven’t read. But nothing scary if I’m trapped!
5. If you could go back in time and meet someone from history who would it be? Whoops! Couldn’t decide and then forgot to answer. I’ll just put Emily Dickinson.
6. You arrive home after a long day and the magic elves have cooked/prepared your favourite meal, what is it? Sautéed mushrooms over wilted greens and lovely fresh seafood pasta.
7. Someone pulls out in front of you on the motorway, makes you slam your breaks on, then speeds off. What would you like to happen to them? Ticket for speeding and reckless driving. I know that sounds boring, but if people were actually penalized properly, things would get better on the roads and we wouldn’t have to hate each other and be so stressed.
8. What burning question that I didn’t ask would you like to answer? How many words am I up to in NaNoWriMo ~ 7674

Eight is the new 11, yayyy! Thanks Kristian for not going up to 11!

Eight random things about me then:

1. My ears are significantly asymmetrical.

2. I remember names much better than faces.

3. I don’t ask/care about/remember facts about people such as age, location, job because those things bore me, but I will remember something funny they said.

4. I have written two complete, legit romance novels (available for Kindle).

5. I have done stand-up comedy.

6. I won an award in high school for being awesome at Spanish.

7. I barely remember any Spanish now.

8. I still have some Beanie Babies.

If you have fewer than 500 WordPress followers, you have now been chosen by me as a Liebster Award Recipient ~ congrats! Please follow the rules above and take my 8 random facts (8 is the new 11) and questionize them (what about you is asymmetrical, do you remember names or faces, etc.).

Happy Liebstering!

20 Questions

I saved these from Ashley Leia since my blogging has been a little light the last few days. Yesterday I wrote over 2500 words on my NaNo novel and penned a poem for my new book in progress, so I feel super productive starting the week.

• what’s the most dangerous situation you have ever been in?

– Driving in SoCal.

• what’s your favourite culture?

– Feline.

• what do you dislike about your own culture?

– The thing that’s currently president.

• your favourite type of travel?

– Staycation!

• do you feel understood?

– The lizard 🦎 gets me.

• how do you feel about your body?

– Hurts too much imo.

• what is your favourite film?

– When Harry Met Sally.

• are you adventurous with food?

– No.

• have you ever hated a place and wanted to come home?

– Always.

• are you bothered about others seeing you naked?

– Who? What have you heard?

• Are you a good loser?

– Yes.

• what was the favourite time of your life?

– When my girls were little and my mom was still around and I could do whatever I pleased.

• Do you have a close family connection?

– With my daughters.

• can you speak another language?

– No.

• will Trump be in for another term?

– 🤮🤮🤮

• what are your thoughts on English people?

– You mean like James Bond, Hugh Grant, handsome Dukes with castles who sometimes have to go about disguised as pirates because of some mixup… what was the question?

• was life better without mobile phones?

– Yes, and the internet, microwaves, vaccines, cars, bras, antibiotics, indoor plumbing, wheels, and fire. Fucking fire, caused so many problems.

• what has been the biggest change in your life?

– Being completely alone in my 50s and accepting this new reality.

• is climate change real?

– Duh.

• why do you like answering questions?

– It’s a nice little break from writing. Then I save them to publish in the middle of the night and know I’ll have at least one poast out for tomorrow.

Feel free to C&P and play along!