Tag Archives: education

Questions from Carol Anne

Autumn leaves

My lovely friend Carol Anne has given me some questions. They’re associated with her Liebster Award. Congrats on your award, Carol Anne, and thanks for thinking of me! 💖

My 11 questions to you my nominees are:

1. Can you swim?

I know the basics, but I’m not a strong swimmer, and frankly I prefer to stay on land and gaze out at the beautiful waves.

2. Pepsi or coke?

Coke, please.

3. Snail mail or email?

Email is less wasteful.

4. Do you enjoy traveling?

No. Shocking, I realize. Everyone loves to travel, right? Well, I do enjoy experiencing new sights, attractions, nature, etc., but the expense and inconvenience make it a net negative for me. Travel is very costly unless you go by car, split the cost of gas, have people to put you up at your destination, yada. Or go camping, lol. Then there are all the migraine triggers for me that happen from noise, light, discomfort, etc. Also, there is my ongoing back/neck pain. Not to mention I don’t like leaving my kitty for more than a couple nights because I miss him too much! 🐱❤️

5. Snow or rain?

I’m from the East and honestly I miss the idea of snow but not the reality of it. Snow is beautiful and fun, if you don’t have to be anywhere and can bundle up and take a lovely walk. Rain can be romantic if you’re snuggled indoors with your sweetie, or a kitty and a good book, but again not if you have to drive in it. Since I’m in California, land of perpetual drought, I welcome any and all precipitation! Of course, we always get the “wrong” kind, in the “wrong” place, so they tell us the drought goes on…

6. What is one of your favourite quotes?

Life is short; eat dessert first. 🧁

7. Are you a glass half full or glass half empty sorta person?

Depends on the day.

8. What is your favourite flower?

Sunflower. Or tulips!🌷

9. If you could give your younger self some advice what would you say?

Go to Northwestern (in high school)! Stop dating insane men (in the 1980s). Buy tech stocks (in the 1990s)! Sell the tech stocks (before the crash). STOP DATING INSANE MEN. 🙄

10. If you had one superpower what would it be?

Repelling insane men.

11. Favourite book?

The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera. Tied for second place: Where I’m Calling From (short stories by Raymond Carver) and Blind Willow, Sleeping Woman (short stories by Haruki Murakami).

~*~

©️2019 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Scary Sharing [ranty]

Scream

Questions from Sparks

Social media (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat) a good thing, a bad thing or a mixture of both?

Bad. Right now, I have a Twitter account, which I mainly use for poetry prompts and news, but the way others use it to argue and snark 24/7? Bad. It contributes to our nasty, bullying culture. Of course nastiness and bullying existed before the internet, but we weren’t hooked into it every minute of the day. You could take an actual break from school and not look at what people were saying. But now? Well, naturally you “need to know.” Same goes for the garbage on FB and Insta… you can’t be out of the loop! 😱

Before people fly into a tizzy, I’m not saying anything should be banned. I voluntarily left Facebook and Instagram. I suggest you do the same. Unfortunately I still have an account I made just to use Messenger for the convenience of friend chats, but I hope that’s temporary. It irritates me that some friends are opposed to normal texting.

I am absolutely opposed to the constant political screamfest on every corner of the internet that has accomplished absolutely nothing. Everyone is now able to screech about how much they hate X and get a pile of X-haters to agree, and another pile of Y-haters to engage in an endless namecalling jamboree, yippee doodle. What a great way to spend our free time. 🙄

Besides that, social media has destroyed privacy. Many of us overshare in so many ways; it’s the new normal to blurt out our feelings all the time to the whole world or to our 500 “friends.” Not only that, but in order to have “free” access to the things, we give giant corporations all our info, and shrug off periodic hacking and ID theft as a cost of doing business because we simply must stay connected 24/7 to these people who actually don’t even notice when we disappear. They really don’t.

People begged me not to leave Facebook. Then they laughed and said I’d be back in a month. Now, they’ve forgotten me. There are bloggers who have left. Some used to post and comment all the time. Who even ever thinks about them?

Are you camera shy or do you pose for the camera with confidence?

I’m not a fan of people taking my pic when I’m talking or have a mouthful of food. I always let people know when I’m taking their photo, and if they don’t want me to, I don’t. That said, if someone asks, I’ll always smile and agree. Why not ask? It’s just good manners.

Is there anything you’ve kept from younger years for sentimental reasons alone?

I have a folder full of school stuff to remind me of how much potential I once had and that I let it fade away to nothing.

Do you like to decorate for different holidays?

When I had a house I did. I especially went all out for Halloween because that’s such a fun holiday to me, with no pressure for family dinners or gifts. It’s just pure silly enjoyment. For the kids I mean! 🤣🎃👻

Halloween pumpkin head

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Laura’s October Challenge (Day 7)

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©️2019 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

One-Liner Wednesday

F. Scott Fitzgerald quote

I’ve always felt that autumn is for fresh starts, not endings, probably because of the school year. But also I get so lazy in the summer and fall revs me up. I’m already more productive. Plus, early September is horrible for my migraines and then they suddenly and mysteriously taper off during the last week or so.

Looking forward to a good October!

~*~

Written for Linda’s One-Liner Wednesday and Laura’s October Challenge (Day 2)

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©️2019 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

All Apologies

There are many forms of apologies, most of them insincere. We’ve all seen the political apology (not limited to politicians, of course), where the person is simply sad they got caught doing the thing and hopes to continue doing the thing, but differently. The people who support the politician will forgive him, and the ones who don’t won’t, whatever the thing may be.

Then there’s the the celebrity apology. This occurs when a celeb says something stupid, which happens on the daily, and they come trotting out in front of the cameras, all abashed looking, saying how deeply sorry they are if they’ve caused offense to anyone and they certainly didn’t mean to. Usually they’re forgiven because they’re pretty.

The cheater’s apology is a combo of the above. Mostly, the cheater is deeply sorry he got caught. He has suddenly realized his behavior is wrong ~ or hers, in the case of those college scam moms. S/he promises to make amends to those s/he has wronged.

Blah blah blah.

I say sorry a lot. Usually it’s because I’m clumsy and bump into people or drop stuff. Or I’m not paying attention and don’t hear something or have forgotten it two seconds later. I’ll say sorry when I hear someone else’s sad news even though it’s not my fault because I feel sympathy for them. Saying “my sympathies” sounds too formal for me.

Generally, if I feel badly about something I’ve done to someone, I’ll change my behavior rather than issue a meaningless apology, but this is rare. Why? Well, I don’t interact with many people, and I’m also careful. In my opinion, there are plenty of folks who should apologize to me! Do I expect them to? Of course not. They’re jerks.

I used to be quick to accept apologies ~ too quick. It feels good to forgive. Don’t want to be a dour, unforgiving grump. But this hurt me because I didn’t analyze why a person was apologizing and often it turned out they simply wanted back into my life in order to do the same thing (or worse) yet again. I learned. Took a long time though.

Recently however, I did receive a very nice apology with an offer to be taken out to lunch. I declined the lunch, but the warmth of the apology was appreciated. Now, I do get that it was partly motivated by other concerns, which is fine. It was still gracious. It’s rare to be the recipient of graciousness in this world lately.

Enjoy it when you can.

~*~

Written for Mindlovemisery

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©️2019 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

FPQ41: Perfectly Tense

FPQ

Fandango provocatively asks…

“So this week’s question is for you to discuss what you think about Zadie Smith’s quote. Do you believe that the past is always tense, the future perfect?”

I suggest you visit Fandango’s link to get the full sense of what he’s on about before you try to make sense of my jabber, but do as you will. Obviously, I am going to speak only to my limited experience on this.

In most cases, I believe people engage in a cognitive dissonance regarding their past. Well, let me back up. A disclaimer: Memory is notoriously unreliable. Even our short-term memories can be wrongola, so the idea that we can accurately remember what happened decades back and make judgments from there? Pffft. Let’s get that out of the way. Okay then.

Do I believe the past is always tense? Well, no! That’s silly. Some people say they had wonderful childhoods. Others have had or are currently in long, happy relationships. These people may or may not be optimistic regarding the future, depending upon a whole bunch of factors, including their individual personalities. That married man I was with for 2.5 years was a “glory days” guy, always telling stories of how much fun he’d had back when, and how the future would never measure up. Always nice to hear, amirite? 🙄

I’m somewhere in the middle, as usual. I had an okay childhood, not great, not awful. I recognize that my memories might be inaccurate and there is no one around to verify anything with. I accept responsibility for my part in failed relationships as an adult, which mostly connects to choosing the wrong men and then doubling down. [Note to self: Don’t do that.]

I’m kinda gloomy about the future, I admit. Maybe it’s a function of where I live, but I see people working their butts off and just getting nowhere. Is this happening in “the heartland” as well as on the coasts? You work a normal full-time job, plus maybe do some part-time work too, and can barely afford to rent an apartment? Forget ever buying a house unless Grandma leaves you one or you win the lottery. Maybe you save and save and can buy something with a group of others, but that’s not exactly “the American dream,” to live like a college student decade after decade.

Okay, so Fandango’s post was more about learning from your mistakes in order to create a perfect future. How realistic is that though? I’ll be 60 in 1.5 years. I understand I could have done many things better, but those chances are gone. I can’t redo where I went to college (passed on Northwestern and UCLA like a freaking idiot). I can’t improve my relationship with my parents because they’re both dead. I can’t make it 1995 again and fix my marriage with what I know now.

Learning is great, but opportunities do not stay available forever. Times change, the dogs bark, the caravan moves on. 🐶

~*~

©️2019 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Perchance to Dream…

Night sky with crescent moon and stars

As part of her “Working on Us” series, Beckie asks about sleep disorders…

1. Have you, or do you suffer from sleep disorders?

– It depends. If I engage in foolish behavior, my sleep will become disordered. Forex, if I stay up until the wee hours, for any reason, good or bad, I won’t be able to make up the lost sleep. (I’m physically unable to sleep past 6am or so.) I’ll be exhausted during the day, clumsier than usual, and feel awful. It will take almost a week of tiny naps and incremental earlier bedtimes to be okay again. I can’t simply go to bed at 8pm and get it over with because then I’ll wake at 2am and be done for the night.

2. Have you sought treatment for your sleep disorders?

– Yes, I have Valium for the times when I’m too upset to fall asleep naturally. Since I quit dating, at the end of 2016, I haven’t needed a refill.

3. Have you ever had a sleep study on you, and if so, what was recommended?

– No.

4. Has your doctor prescribed medication for your sleep disorder, if so, what has worked for you?

– Valium (Rx) or Benadryl.

5. Have you ever tried home remedies to alleviate your sleep disorders? 

– Yes, and they’re all silly. Drugs work. But even better is to eliminate stressful things from my life, such as dating.

6. What’s the longest amount of time you went without sleep?

– Probably 24 hours when I studied for my history test back at the U of I after blowing off many of the classes ~ very unlike me, but history is SO BORING. Eventually I said eff it and just memorized the 8 points of fascism. Luckily, that was the essay.

No, I don’t remember them. Geez. 🙄

I’ve always been a “good sleeper,” not fussy about where I get my 💤. I can sleep on a plane. I have slept on a train. I probably could sleep on a box. Or next to a pile of rocks. Etc. But as I age, I find it harder to stay asleep. If I’m in pain from a migraine or a backache, or if Gatsby is yelling, or a scary nightmare wakes me… boom 💥 it’s over for the night. Depending on the time, I may take something to try to return to dreamland; but if it’s 4am or later, meh. I’ll just get up.

I resist taking naps on weekends because there’s so much to accomplish on my list, but the times I succumb, I feel so much more energized. It’s hard to give myself permission though. I like to constantly cross stuff off on my list… naps are not an item. 🐱

~*~

© 2019 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

The Daily Four ~ 08/26/19

Shamrock

From Rory’s Question Fun Directory

Welcome to The Daily Four!

Today’s Questions to the Readers are….

What was the worst thing you did as a child?

I got a C in penmanship when I was 10. It made my mom angry and she in turn created my OCD monster, or lured it out. Lots of unfortunate things resulted from this event.

Growing up, what was your ideal dream job and did you bring that to a reality at all?

I had various dreams at various times: scientist, writer, journalist, etc. But I didn’t pursue any of them seriously.

What were the things you both liked and hated about your schooling?

I loved the educational parts of school: reading, writing, even tests (because I was good at them). I hated anything to do with gym or sports or forced social interaction, like Valentine exchanges.

Where there is a will, there is a way! Do you agree?

Somewhat. Forex, I could never be a ballet dancer because I don’t have the innate talent, but if that’s something I loved, I could have been part of that world in some other way, such as a set designer. (Just using this as an example; I don’t care about ballet!)

I think, when we’re younger, we tend to work harder at relationships. Maybe they don’t seem like “work” then. We’re not so inflexible and intolerant about so many things. We decide to be friends or to be in a romance or to pursue a career goal, and we will it to work, whether it’s long-distance or in another culture or whatever. We shrug at hardships and “odds” of failure. Pffft! Failure! We’ll be the special, stand-out case.

But then life happens and most of us non-delusional people (key phrase) come to understand that we aren’t that special. We’ve failed at things we were positive couldn’t go wrong. We’ve been rejected for jobs we snootily assumed we were too good for. We’ve been dumped by dates who weren’t even as smart and cute as we were. Geez!

We start recalculating those odds of failure. We start to understand rejection is the norm whenever we send in a query letter. We start assuming that the next coffee meet is likely not going to be our soul mate. We quit going outside our comfort zone, since even things inside it aren’t sure bets.

What’s sadly ironic is that when we’re young and more inclined to plow ahead with sheer “will,” we probably have less experience and talent to get our “way.” Later when we have experience, talent, knowledge, etc., we have less will to try because of past failures weighing us down, so we just la la around and say meh why bother? I won’t get my way.

I’m sure Rory didn’t want all this gobble goop, but like whatever.

The Daily Four

~*~

© 2019 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon

Conscious Streaming [socs]

Stream of Consciousness Saturday

Co-ed is a term you don’t hear very often these days. It always seemed insulting to me, a code to treat someone dismissively. Why not call college females “students” same as we do males? Nope, it was part of our constant obsession with labels. We still have that compulsion. Different ones now, but even so, we can’t quit consigning people to boxes. Not all are bad, of course, but I prefer mine to be filled with cookies not people. Should there be a comma after cookies? I generally err on the side of fewer is better so as not to drive my readers into a punctuation coma. But if you’re a comma cop, I can concur with the concept of including one there. Whew! I could have used a second cup of coffee today, though that’s a moot point now since this will post tomorrow while I’m cocooned in my cozy bed. Hopefully my lovely readers across the pond and on the East Coast will have checked in before I see it again. Note that I generally don’t comma off starter adverbs either unless I want the reader to take a dramatic pause. It may not seem as though there’s a method to my cornucopia of madness, but I assure you nothing is coincidental.

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© 2019 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

PFF11: Parenting

Time

Welcome to my Friday Flashback! This post originally appeared here on August 15, 2012, seven years and one day ago. I suggest clicking through to read the fun comments.

Mommies v Daddies

Now I understand why guys appear “born” knowing about cars.

You know how when mommies go out for a walk with their kids (boys or girls) they point out various things?

“Look, there’s a pretty flower!”

“There’s a kitty!”

“See the bakery? Let’s get a cookie!”

That’s not what daddies do. I went to dinner in Long Beach last night and had to park several blocks from the restaurant. As I was walking, a daddy was behind me with his little boy. This is how the daddy’s conversation went:

“There’s a BMW.”

“That’s an Audi.”

“This is a Lexus.”

And there you have it.

~*~

© 2019 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Song Lyric Sunday ~ Celeb

Song Lyric Sunday

This week Jim asks us to post a song that includes a famous person. There are loads to choose from, but I have to go with the goofy “I’m Henry the VIII, I Am” song I taught my kids when they were little. My youngest got brownie points from her teacher when she was the only fifth grader who knew it. Makes a mommy proud!

This song is actually very old, written in 1910 by Fred Murray and J.P. Weston. But I’m using a vid from the more current cover by Herman’s Hermits in 1965.

I’m Henry the 8th I am,
Henry the 8th I am, I am,
I got married to the widow next door,
She’s been married 7 times before,
And every one was a Henry (Henry),
She wouldn’t have a Willy or a Sam (no Sam)
I’m her 8th old man I Henry,
Henry the 8th I am

Second verse, same as the first!
[…]

https://youtu.be/4cly_2pGTNw

~*~

© 2019 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.