Tag Archives: driving

Scary Shary [SYW]

Here are Melanie’s “Share Your World” 10-15-18 Questions:

What’s the biggest screw up in the kitchen that you were responsible for?

– I tried to open a bottle with a serrated knife before work and almost sliced my finger off. Went to work with a makeshift bandage that kept getting blood-soaked and they sent me to the doctor, where I got stitches. 😢

What, in your opinion, makes people believe absurd conspiracy theories?

– Fear. People are scared of the unknown, of things they can’t control ~ natural disasters, crime, death, etc. ~ so they latch onto comforting explanations. Without this comfort, many people would not be able to function because life is fucking terrifying. And for the atheists who like to mock those who believe in the supernatural, I have news for you: you also believe in bullshit, just different bullshit. Consider this. At any moment, you could die and die horribly, but you don’t think about that because you wouldn’t be able to get through the day. And what’s more, every time you leave the house, you trust that crazy medicated (or unmedicated!) other humans in their monster vehicles are going to obey the traffic laws. These are the same people who believe in gods and ghosts and angels and aliens. But you believe they’ll stop at the red lights. That’s nuts! But you believe it or you couldn’t leave the house.

In 40 years what will people be nostalgic for?

– Trump. Yeah, he was an absolutely disgusting horrible racist misogynistic pig, but at least he was human and now we have these AI overlords and glrkk–(end transmission)

Is a hot dog a sandwich?

– No, a hot dog is a bunch of garbage scraps of meat byproducts scraped together from the slaughterhouse floor and fake colored pink. Perhaps you’re thinking of the hot dog bun? Again, not if it’s hinged together. A snadwich is two separate bread pieces with something in the middle. Like peanut butter and blackberry jam, which is much more delicious than yucky floor scrapings.

And finally:

What wonderful thing happened to you this week that you’d like to share?  It can be a gratitude moment or something that just made you feel very happy at the time or made you laugh.

– Well, I had a big mad at Amazon because I ordered cat food and tea last week that was scheduled for delivery yesterday and I was sitting right there in my apartment when I got an email that the delivery guy came and left since he didn’t have my gate code. Wtfff? My gate code is in my address on Amazon and so is my phone number! Why didn’t he call? Why can’t he read? I know it’s only cat food and tea, and it’s rescheduled for today, but I was livid. I feel that Prime’s quality has gone down as their prices have increased just like my internet provider Spectrum. So, I began a chat with Amazon at 11pm last night all irate and they were very sorry and are going to “strictly escalate” my order and yada yada plus give me five bucks. Yayyy!

Happy! Shopping again. 🙂⭐️🎈

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The Obsession with Sound [ranty rant]

I cop to being unusual, but I really do not understand the internet’s obsession with sound. Here we have the perfect medium for the written word and yet people relentlessly attempt to undermine that, day in and day out, with audio. Whyyy???

I mock all of you who can’t go five minutes without listening to music or babble. Hell, I teased my own children about this, not that it did any good. Apparently they were able to get great grades with their awful tunes blasting as they worked, idk how. BACK IN MY DAY, I studied in silence as the goddess intended.

It drives me bananas when I click on a link, believing I’m going to be reading a nice article, but instead a horrible video starts playing. ICK!!! Of course I have my phone on silent, but that’s not the point. The point is… why do so many of you prefer to be yapped at rather than read something at your leisure?

I almost did a lengthy music poll the otter day from a fellow blogger until I realized, meh, I don’t care enough about music to answer all these questions. I’ll tell you guys a secret too, since you’re my extra special blog readers: sometimes I don’t have any music 🎶 on in the car. I just drive along, accompanied only by MY OWN THOUGHTS. Pretty damn scary, eh? Well, I’m a tough old bird. Ask anyone.

Now before anyone misreads this and concludes I hate music ~ I don’t. I simply am not obsessed with it. I enjoy music some of the time. (Audio clips of news items pretty much never ever.) I have a minimal amount of trivia stored in my mind about some oldies, but not a lot and idc. This makes me a mediocre player at many of the music trivia games. Boo hoo. Last couple years I’ve been enjoying a little bit of country music (when it has amusing lyrics) and a little bit of classical (no lyrics). But again, I have no knowledge of these genres. There is nothing more irritating than mentioning I like something to a rabid fan, and then they dive into an enormous boring lecture on the thing. MUTE BUTTON PLZ!

Oh look, I segued into a secondary rant there. It happens. Actually rather a lot. 😂

The takeaway? Silence is next to godliness, even for an atheist. Especially one who gets migraines.

Octolages

As is my way, I’m doing City Sonnet’s photo challenge in one swell foop. This time, the whole month will be right here in one poast! How exciting! Since I didn’t want to overwhelm my readers with 31 full-size pics in predictable order, I mashed them up in collages. First, I will poast the key, and then I’ll show you my photo art. You can match them up if you like, or simply enjoy for a minute and return to your normally scheduled life.

A Return to Normalcy

I always say I like the routine of the workweek. I enjoy getting up early with a sense of purpose, knowing I can’t laze around too long because I have to get dressed and go to the office soon. I wouldn’t want to work at home in sweatpants, since I like having a reason to dress nicely and, most importantly, have a collection of shooze in various colors and styles. Not to mention boots! If I worked at home, I’d never wear adorable corduroy skirts with cute sweaters and boots. The horror.

Plus the workweek makes the weekends so much sweeter. You schedule fun plans (or no plans!) and look forward to seeing friends, going to cool events, watching movies, or just blissing out in peace when Saturday morning rolls around.

That said, for over a week last week I hibernated with my daughter up in NorCal and really really enjoyed it. I drove her car to the store twice, and we took short walks around the neighborhood. But other than that, and letting her doggie outside in the back, I stayed in, wore sweats, and pretty much did nothing but read books, blog, color, eat various carbs, snack on candy, etc. I also kept checking the online news too frequently, blech!

Point is, I quickly forgot how much I allegedly love the routine of getting out of the house and going to work in a cute outfit, and I immediately adapted to shlumping around like a retired brown bear. Didn’t realize how adaptable I am. What a nice trait to discover so late in life. (Pats self on back.) (Ow.)

But today I’m back to normal.

Traffic Tirade

Everyone hates traffic, but I would venture to say that most people get upset with jams on the road because they haven’t given themselves enough time to get to their destination. Then they’re cranky and upset because they’re late. I always leave extra time because I know there is likely to be a nasty clog at some point, and the longer the trip the higher the odds. So, time isn’t my issue.

People are. The cranky, upset people who behave unpredictably terrify me. They’ll abruptly change lanes unsafely for no reason. They’ll start honking because they’re angry and must express it, even though that accomplishes nothing. If I need to change lanes to exit, I try to be polite, but occasionally am forced to be slightly aggressive, due to these idiots guarding “their” space like a lion stalking a gazelle, and I hate that. It makes my head pound. So stressful.

Tirade aside, I’ve been thinking about where I would live if I could do whatever I wanted, and surprisingly it wouldn’t be out in the sticks away from traffic and crowds. I don’t like feeling isolated from civilization and culture. What I did enjoy was living in Chicago and not owning a car. I was free from driving stresses and car expenses. I used their great public transportation system whenever I needed to, along with the occasional taxicab. I went wherever I pleased without one iota of concern re traffic and parking. That was fabulous!

That’s my ideal: another city with great art, restaurants, museums, etc. AND a reliable public transportation system, but also affordable and not ridonkulously cold or beastly hot. That rules out every major city, unfortunately. 😂

Oops, Not That Way!

Sorry this pic is a bit blurry. I snapped it from the passenger window during our trip from Flagstaff to Las Vegas, which route normally doesn’t pass through Utah, unless the driver is focused on a business deal over the phone instead of directions. We decided to make the best of it and detoured to Zion National Park, which is one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever seen. I’d like to return someday for a more leisurely visit.

I thought the photo was a good choice for this week’s Which Way photo challenge.

Where she almost runs out of gas & ends up with cupcakes

So the otter day I needed gas and should have stopped off after work but was too lazy. I’ll get it in the morning, I thought. But in the morning, I forgot I needed gas and didn’t leave extra time before work to get some. I could have been a couple minutes late, but I don’t like to do that. I’ll get it at lunch, I decided. But then I didn’t wanna cuz I was busy eating a potato. After work, I really had to get some because the light came on when I started the car. Eeps! Scary!

I went to the Shell station by my office, which I hate cuz peeps are rude and aggressive there, but whatever. My credit card didn’t work. Which was ridic because it’s a new card and I have plenty of credit on it. Maybe the card reader doesn’t like new, anti-fraud cards? I tried an older card, also with plenty of money on it, and it didn’t work either. OMG the Shell station knows I hate it and hates me back! There were no open pumps and so I left in a rage.

I googled gas stations and saw there was a Chevron right nearby on MacArthur. Great! The map lady kept telling me to turn on streets that were not MacArthur, which was putting me into more of a boiling rage. Sometimes I really hate the map lady. Why can’t I just turn on MacArthur, which is coming right up? I did that. Then I see the Chevron is on my left directly across from the airport. What a pain. SHIRLEY there are more gas stations if I drive down MacArthur just a little bit, right? It’s full of hotels and businesses. I keep driving (with the fuel light on) and NOTHING. WTF? Why are there no gas stations anywhere? OMFG! I’m thinking I should turn around and go to the Chevron, but then I’m at Fashion Island already, which is a giant mall/business center. Oh FFS, there has to be a gas station here!

I end up flung out on Pacific Coast Highway where there is a 76 station, hooray, so I go there. The gas is of course like $18 per gallon, since I’m not even in Newport Beach now but Corona del Mar, where the homes are $4M minimum. Excuse me estates. It cost me $430 to fill up my Corolla. People looking at me like oh haha maid’s night out isn’t that cute? The 76 station card reader is fine with my new credit card.

Btw, I now hate Range Rovers more than BMWs, for anyone keeping track of my prefs.

While the car is gobbling up the primo fuel, I’m thinking dur I could have simply driven home and gotten gas at my normal Mobil station, and I would have wasted less gas and time looking for gas, but noooo. Now, at this point, a sensible person would go home, nuke some dinner, and watch the tube, but we’re talking about me… and I see I’m directly across from Corona del Mar Plaza. This plaza contains Gulfstream bar and restaurant, where I first met the man who broke my heart ~ remember him? We just talked about him! But who cares, eh?

Corona del Mar Plaza also haz a Sprinkles Cupcakes store. Oh, yes it does. After my tremendously stressful ordeal finding gas, I decide I am entitled to a gourmet cupcake, which I haven’t had in ages. I bought two: the triple cinnamon and the pumpkin, both with cinnamon cream cheese frosting. I wanted to try their special flavor, Timeless Magic (might be a Harry Potter thing), cuz it was gorgeous purple with gold dust and black velvet cake, but once they said it was filled with pop rocks I reverted to form and took the pumpkin.

Lest anyone think I ate two cupcakes at once (the horror!), I had one for dinner and one the next morning for breakfast. Here’s a weird thing. I loved the cake part of these cupcakes, especially the cinnamon, which I highly recommend. Soooo moist and flavorful (and I don’t understand why people have a thing about the word moist). But since I haven’t had frosting since like my birthday in April, I found it almost too sweet at first. Then I got used to it again and it was fabulous! But my reaction shocked me. Too sweet? What? But even the little bit of candy I indulge in now and then isn’t enough to keep my sugar craving up to 11 like before. Honestly I would be happy with just the cinnamon cake sans frosting. Or the pumpkin.

I know. Who am I? What’s happened to the real Paula? If we’re such enigmas to even ourselves, with our own once-solid traits as shifting as the sands, how can we expect to begin to understand another person? Take a look around you, at the people you think you know… do you really know them at all? Do you really know yourself? Anything can change in an instant… like your dessert preferences. Proceed with caution.

This was like two (2) enthralling poasts in one. You’re welcome! 😀

Oops forgot a title omgawd!

Look 👀 I’m sharing again! 😱

Questions from Sparks:

Last week I asked a question about favorite beverages and the overwhelming favorite was coffee.   If you drink coffee, how do you like it best?  Hot, cold, iced, with cream, with sugar or black as black?

– Well, I answered tea, I think, but who can remember last week really? It seems forever ago with all the insanity that’s happened since. I’ve got to quit reading so much news (she says every time she checks the news). I like coffee with cream, or all fancied up with ice and caramel and whipped cream for a bajillion calories and then I tell myself I’ve “skipped dinner.”

If you don’t drink coffee, how has that beverage impacted YOUR world?

– You mean like all the stupid Starbucks meets I went on when I was still on dating sites thinking I’d meet a nice guy and we’d fall in love so I’d have fun and company and sex and cuddles in my sunset years and not have to DIE ALONE WITH THE CAT as I choke on a c00kie in my kitchen while no one calls for help? Um… no, coffee hasn’t impacted my world at all. Weird question.

In your opinion, what’s the greatest invention of our age?

– C00kies 🍪🍪🍪

Global warming?  Reality or myth?

– I’m going with NASA’s research on this. The great thing about referring to the minds at NASA ~ you know, the rocket scientists, physicists, mathematicians, engineers, etc. who got us to the freaking moon ~ is that you can totes dismiss the goofballs in MAGA hats who scream about conspiracy theories. Poof! All gone.

Are you an explorer or more a home body?

– I’m definitely a homebody. I generally hate going out, especially if I have to drive anywhere far. My favorite kind of day is one where I don’t leave my apartment at all. I consider that a big win.

and last:

What were you grateful for this week?

– Paradoxically, that I got to spend Saturday with my daughter, son-in-law, and gbaby, who live 40 miles away… and yes I drove to them. Some things are worth it.

Song Lyrics Sunday: Car

I loved the Cars from the moment I heard them on the radio. Ran right out and bought their first album. Every song was fab. And same goes for their second album Candy-O, released in 1979. I especially like “Double Life.” Lyrics written by Ric Ocasek.

*

It takes a fast car lady to lead a double life
It takes a slow star lady if you want to do it twice
You take your backseat rumble
Take your front seat wife
Takes a fast car lady to lead a double life
It takes a light foot lady to lead a double life
It takes a good book maybe if you want to do it nice
When you idle at the stop light you better get the signal right
Light foot lady, you need a double life
Well, lift me from the wonder maze
Alienation is the craze
And it’s all gonna happen to you
You think it’s a phase
And it’s all gonna happen to you
When you drive in the haze
It takes a freeway lady to lead a double life
It takes some leeway lady if you want to do it twice
Neon blinking on the street
Everyone is bittersweet
Freeway lady, you lead a double life
Well, lift me from the wonder maze
Alienation is the craze
And it’s all gonna happen to you
You think it’s a phase
And it’s all gonna happen to you
When you drive in the haze
It’s all gonna happen to you
[…]

*

Hotel California Mixup

On a dark dessert highway,
Cool wind in my hair,
Ubiquitous robots
Searched the cars for eclairs.

Up ahead in the distance,
Someone was cooking with spice.
My mouth watered and my eyes grew big;
I had found my snack for tonight.

There she stood in the doorway…
I heard the oven bell.
She said how about some noodles?
I spied a hidden chocolate pie shell.

Then she lit up a candle
And said Happy Birthday!
The robots danced in the courtyard,
All in honor of PJ!

(Bet ya didn’t see that coming.)

❤️🌹❤️🌹❤️🌹❤️🌹❤️🌹