Tag Archives: #deletefacebook

Caps & Cobras

It’s been over 6 months since I deleted Facebook and that was a brilliant move, if I do say so myself. Not only did it free up scads of time for blogging (both reading and poasting), which is so much more enjoyable than scrolling through memes and trollery, but it also eliminated a huge bunch of negativity and annoyance from my day. I can read a quick burst of what people are saying about trending topics on twitter, and that’s enough to keep me in the culture loop.

But I need to make another big change, one I’ve been resisting, out of sheer laziness, much like I avoided dumping FB for far too long. And that habit is checking the “news.” I put this in quotes because most of what I’m seeing isn’t real news at all but garbage from bubbleheads. This is beyond what Alyssa fucking Milano has to say about anything, as if I give a shit, but supposed journalists who aren’t. All they do is recycle crap from other sites and try to manipulate our feelings. I know we all know this, but I’m finally doing something about it.

I want to see stuff like natural disasters, famous people’s deaths, election results, etc., reported clearly and dispassionately. I don’t want to be told something is tragic or devastating. I can figure that out myself. If I see a photo of a celeb or their spouse, I’ll decide what to think about their looks; I don’t need to have my opinion spoonfed to me like I’m a toddler in a high chair. Wtfff?

Today I changed my news preferences to see only science and health articles, info about cats and psychology, puzzles and math, etc., along with factual reports of current events from NPR. No more opinions of how I should be terrified of Trump or believe Kavanaugh isn’t an asshole or whatever. That shit isn’t news! Kellyanne’s yapping is not news. Kanye’s blather isn’t news. I don’t care what kind of stupid hat Melania wears while she flits around doing nothing. And holy fucking shit Taylor Swift has an opinion, so let’s all bow down. 🤮

I also dumped all the royals ~ I’ve been punished with nonstop “news” of them because I clicked on a few Markle stories back when. Now they’re all banned. What a bunch of bores. No, sorry, it’s not their fault the idiot press feels they must report on what little George has for lunch. And speaking of hats! The royals are bananas over hats. My god.

Anyway, I’ve been rewarded already! The first story that came up was about cannibal cobras. 🐍 You might think, well sure, if they’re really hungry… tastes like chicken, right? Wrong! They like to nom up other snakes. Because why? Because a snake is really easy for another snake to eat! Bet you never thought about that. Neither did I. We were too busy reading about dumb hats to think about interesting things, such as cobras’ dietary preferences.

I’m gonna have more cool shit like this here in the future. You can hang your hat on it. Or you can keep your hat on… 😘

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A Big Scoop of Bloggy Goodness

I like personal blogs ~ and no that’s not a euphemism for pr0n. I don’t need to see any body parts, thanks. In fact, I don’t even need to see your face, as gorgeous as I’m sure it is. Some bloggers prefer to jabber away in a bit of anonymity, and while I wish no one felt a need to do this, I respect the decision. Even I don’t reveal my full legal name, because trolls and stalkers.

What I’m talking about is people blogging about themselves and their lives, for the most part. I like to know how others think, how they feel about issues, what’s going on in their world. I don’t mind if people link to news articles if they give their personal opinion about the article. I used to say this repeatedly on Facebook: why are you simply linking to a piece on FOX or CNN? I know how to read the damn news. Give me your take on the story. But nope. Link after link after link. I hid people because of it. To this day, I don’t understand why they do that. Do they really believe their friends are too stupid to read the news without directions? Thank gawd I’m done with that FB crap.

I lurve the bloggers I follow now. In most cases, y’all give your opinions on whatever you link to, and that’s what I want to read. Your thoughts! Even if you’re discussing a pile of songs from the 1960s, I’d like to know what inspired you to choose those particular songs or that artist. What are your memories or emotions from that era which this music evokes?

The human interest angle is what makes a blog shine, even if it’s ostensibly about recipes or flowers or doggie photos. When you consider your favorite TV chef or vet or home improvement guru or whomever, it’s the host’s personality that grabs you more than the content. The content could be offered by anyone.

The other week I watched a docu about meerkats, of all the ridiculous things. But it was fascinating. Why? Because of the narrator! He had a lovely, sexy British voice (redundant there, I realize). I had to look him up: Bill Nighy. He’s the reason why I watched a whole bunch of eps and may watch more. Savage little beasties really. (Btw, it’s called Meerkat Manor, and you have to watch the UK version to get Bill, otherwise you end up with Stockard Channing. 😝)

Ta!

Sunny Side Up

Thank you Michelle for the Sunshine Award! Today I’m answering the questions, but instead of calling out 5 more bloggers, I invite anyone reading this to copypasta them to their blog and answer them too. They’re really good questions! I’ll add one more at the end to make an even dozen ~ you know how I am about numbers! 😂

1. Have you ever traveled outside of your country? If so, where?

– Not much, just to St. Martin on my honeymoon a million years ago.

2. Do you collect anything?

– No room! I used to collect Swarovski crystal, so pretty. Oh, and beanie babies lol. I guess I am accumulating a bunch of DVDs on my TV shelf and books on Kindle.

3. What is your favorite comfort food?

– Mac & cheese!

4. What does your typical weekend look like?

– Chores, board games, maybe a family visit, possibly a movie, lots of kitty cuddles, probably a migraine at some point. 😢

5. As a child, what did you think you were going to be when you grew up?

– A mad scientist.

6. What is your greatest inspiration in life?

– I just warily hope for the best, but it’s difficult now with chronic pain and our insanity politics.

7. What do you love most about blogging?

– I say what I want and get minimal grief. If someone tries to troll, I block them. For whatever reason, it’s much less stressful than FB (which I’ve dumped). I hardly see any 24/7 political bloggers, for one thing.

8. What is the most valuable information you can give new bloggers?

– Don’t blog about your job/coworkers or clients, unless you’re self-employed or unemployed, or want to be. 😀

9. What is the best present you can give that is not an actual physical thing?

– Your time.

10. What is the funniest thing that has ever happened to you?

– I “met” Mick Jagger while buying a Sunday paper in West LA back in 1988. He and I helped pick up a pile of cassettes that another guy knocked over. Then we both paid for our papers. He went back to his limo, and I returned to my Camry.

11. What is your best blog post and why?

The Duke vs. the Secretary from 2012. It’s my most viewed and commented upon poast. I guess it really struck a chord!

12. Have you published any writing?

– I’ve been paid for a couple pieces, but most of my published writing is self-pubbed. I’ve just begun gathering the poetry I wrote this year for a new collection and will be putting that up for sale shortly. It will be for e-readers, like my other work. After that, I may return to working on other, older ideas I have percolating along. We’ll see.

As always, thanks for reading!

Insomnia

When people come to you for help, what do they usually want help with?
-Some emotionally distressing thing that I will listen to nonjudgmentally

What takes up too much of your time?
-Insomnia

What do you wish you knew more about?
-How to fall asleep

What would be your first question after waking up from being cryogenically frozen for 100 years?
-Now that was a great night’s sleep! Where’s my phone?

What are some small things that make your day better?
-Catnaps and cats

Who’s your go to band or artist when you can’t decide on something to listen to?
-Oldies mix from the 60s or 70s

What’s the best way to start the day?
-Painfree

What shows are you into?
-Waiting for the end of GOT

What TV channel doesn’t exist but really should?
-Dunno, only have internet

Who has impressed you most with what they’ve accomplished?
-My daughters

What age do you wish you could permanently be?
-14

What TV show or movie do you refuse to watch?
-Historical borings, gory horror, animated, preachy, most other stuff…

What would be your ideal way to spend the weekend?
-Pampered at a luxury spa

What is something that is considered a luxury, but you don’t think you could live without?
-Cell phone/internet

What’s your claim to fame?
-I dumped Facebook

What’s something you like to do the old-fashioned way?
-Nothing

What’s your favorite genre of book or movie?
-Lately suspense (shocking!)

How often do you people watch?
-Not much, would rather read

What have you only recently formed an opinion about?
-Beets, favorable

What’s the best single day on the calendar?
-Every day is a good day to be single

What are you interested in that most people haven’t heard of?
-Synesthesia

How do you relax after a hard day of work?
-Stare at more screens like a boneless zombie

What was the best book or series that you’ve ever read?
The Unbearable Lightness of Being

What’s the farthest you’ve ever been from home?
-Maui

What is the most heartwarming thing you’ve ever seen?
-My girls being awesome to each other

What is the most annoying question that people ask you?
-“Have you tried [whatever thing] for your migraines?”

A Bit Of Pontificating

It’s been a while since I said anything controversial and pissed people off. I shall attempt to remedy that right meow. 🐱

Like everyone else, I believe I have achieved the perfect balance between extremes. Almost no one categorizes herself as a loony lefty or a rightwing wacko, though we can all easily find some (if we so desire), label them, and mock. I’m no exception and neither are you. How does that feel? 😂😂😂

We all want to be special. We like to think our ideas are exciting and unique, but mostly they’re not. So sad. Sometimes we get jealous and irritated at people who, for whatever reason, have staked a claim to fame, so we criticize them. I do. You do too, right? I probably could find a hundred better uses of my time. Even checking the news now is mostly a waste of time, since it’s almost all repetitive garbage about our horrible POTUS and celebrity fluff.

Did you catch that last sentence? Like most reasonable people, I think the POTUS is a deranged, narcissistic moron, but you may have also noticed I don’t spend much time talking, poasting, or tweeting about him. What’s the point? I wouldn’t be saying anything new or interesting, and I’d just get myself all riled up. For nothing. I’ll make my preferences known on my ballot.

Note that I’m not criticizing people who spend loads of time focused on hating the Prez. Go for it. Some folks make a living that way, but even if you don’t and you’re having fun, great. I don’t find the hate-follow to be enjoyable ~ in fact, I try to block the things I hate. The entire Trump family is blocked from my twitter feed, and I only wish I could block them and the KarJenners from regular news as well. I actually consider them on the same level, though I guess Kylie is richer than all of them because… lipstick?

Maybe I’m just jealous. I admit it might be nice to be a beautiful billionaire. I’d at least be willing to try it for a year, hey. If it didn’t work out, no hard feelings, I’ll leave with a nice parting gift of $100M, okies? And all the clothes and plastic surgery, natch. 😀

It’s been almost 6 months since I deleted my Facebook account, and I find that my peace of mind has increased accordingly. I encourage everyone who feels stressed by the level of hate and negativity online to consider giving up Facebook ~ it really is a pit of despair. I’m not talking about the ads and scammers, which are bad enough, but your friends. Yes, them. Your friends are depressing. I’m not making this up ~ there have been studies. No, I’m not spoon-feeding you links; you know where Google is. If you have a bunch of sad friends talking about their sads, it will tend to bring you down. If you have a bunch of shiny, happy friends poasting about their perfect lives, you’ll get down about that, even if you suspect they’re faking it. And then there’s all the relentless arguing about shit that doesn’t matter in the context of friendship. Do we really have to engage in vicious name-calling with friends of friends, people we will never meet, over abortion, gay rights, immigration, etc.? Why?

I’m outta that horror stew for good. I know there are folks who get into the same (or worse) mess on Twitter, but I’m not one. I don’t jump into controversial threads, and my own little tweets never go viral. Exiting FB didn’t cure all my problems, but it was a nice start. I’ve exited many other online time-wasters too, such as Instagram. And guess what? I don’t miss taking constant pics of my food. Gawd, that was silly.

I’m trying to stop reading comments on news articles because they’re just a magnet for trolls and other nasty types. I condemn any publication that allows anonymous, unmoderated comments in order to boost clicks. It’s just wrong and encourages racists and misogynists and all manner of bullies to spew their hate. Whenever I see one of these creepsters, I do not engage, but use whatever means available to block them from engaging with me online. I know that’s not everyone’s way (and didn’t use to be mine either), but I find it works best for me now. The more you feed them, the more they will return. It’s a universal law.

I guess that’s enough pontificating. For now. Kinda got into it… might do moar soon. Consider yourself warned!

Fungible People [RDP]

What a coincidence that fungible is one of the prompts for today… I was ruminating (moo!) on the concept last night, using a lot of words and metaphors, but never coming up with this one. Fungible is always used with things like money and oil, not people ~ but why can’t it be used with people?

One of the reasons I’m becoming more introverted with age is due to my feeling that so many people view others as interchangeable objects. And I dislike this obviously. I had the sense as a young mom that other moms were my “friends” only because it was convenient. Once it stopped being convenient, the friendship dissolved. Example: I thought I was close friends with R, and we did many fun things together with our kids, but then she needed someone for a carpool and I couldn’t do it, so she asked A, who could. I literally never heard from R again. I was easily switched out with another person. Fungible.

I find it interesting that almost all my Facebook “friends” have disappeared since my exit. I basically have the same friends I had pre-FB ~ a handful of writers and meatspace peeps. Those FB connections were a pile of meaningless fluff, nothing to any of us, and only a way for Mark Z and the advertisers to rake in bucks. Since I’m not special, I’ll presume to say it’s the same for everyone. Just so you know.

After my divorce, I had the silly idea that divorced men would also be looking for the right person, not wanting to make another mistake late in life, etc. But this is mostly not true. They are looking for anyone who vaguely fits into a mental cutout they have labeled “girlfriend” (or “hookup” as the case may be). Anyone who fits will do, and if she leaves, he’ll easily replace her with another, or try to. We’re all fungible.

More and more, I only enjoy interacting with my family (and a few close friends): as the mom, I’m not fungible. No one can take my place. No one has ever replaced my mother. I still think about her every day. ❤️

Good News

On this auspicious day, when a swollen ego got knocked off the major platforms of play and had to take his nasty ball of hate away, I mark the occasion with a resplendent hip hip hooray!

Free speech? Sure, if you’re not promoting violence and inciting spirals of real-world bullying and harm, slandering folks, etc. I hope this ushers in a new era when people are held to TOS all around. I realize it’s a huge task, but there was a time when, forex, Facebook required “real names” and it wasn’t so easy for bots to flood in with fake emails. It wouldn’t be that hard to require a ping to a credit card and location coordinates before allowing a new account.

But of course if all you care about is making a billion bucks a minute then you will only pretend to be concerned about security. That’s another issue. We can still be happy that Conspiracy Dude got kicked off the sites. Rah!

Double rah! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Stats up the WaZOO

I can’t keep pace with many of the new bloggers I’ve discovered this year, but even though I don’t match their prodigious daily output, I’m certainly happy to have them in my feed. Such a fab variety of creative writings and so many diverse POVs! Love that. Lots of these peeps talk about their stats and I don’t pay much attention to mine, except to occasionally whine that no one has bought any of my books lately so why do I even bother yada then I get over it.

This morning I decided to check my actual bloggeroo stats and I took screenshots so I could share. I figured hey now what would my blogfans like to do on a nice weekend… beach, BBQ, hike, bike, garden… ? Nahhh. They’ll wanna peruse my stats.

First, not counting this poast, I have a grand total of 519 poasted poasts since I began this blog on March 25, 2011 with a cupcake. I have deleted a lot of poasts, mostly complaints about dating sites/men because I thought, ha ha, I might meet a new man, and I wouldn’t want him to see all that bitching, since of course he’d read my blog cover to cover yet wouldn’t know a thing about the Wayback Machine: Dating Logic 🙄. Thank gawd that’s over. There are months of little to no activity when I was busy moving or getting divorced. I also used to spend much of my free social media time on Facebook, but I quit there this March because #facebooksucks. Since then, I’ve been blogging much more, yayyy.

Second, I have 1,045 total comments, as follows.

Many bloggers have a higher hit ratio of likes, but I am pleased with this.

My most commented-on poast, by far, remains The Duke vs. the Secretary (which is also my most-viewed poast, natch), from way back in June 2011.

Third, commenters. This, my friends, is where things may get a little bit hairy. Are you ready for some drama? Buckle up! Year after year, when I poast the stats WordPress gives me on their Happy New Year’s card, Roy wins top commenter. It’s just the Way Things Are. But right now, in the doldrums of August, lil Miss PJ has snuck up on Roy and edged him out of the top spot! ZOMG!

(By “top” I mean second, obviously. I’m always Numero Uno.)

Don’t panic, Roy! There’s still enough time before the end of the year for you to regain your title. Hell, it’s anyone’s game really. Just comment your hearts 💕 out, folks! It’s not too late!

Btw, I think it’s only fair to mention that Stan was my very first commenter, back on the cupcake poast we discussed several paras ago. You’re all still with me, right? Good. There may be a quiz after.

Finally, I will finish up with the observation that my topics of noodling, fun, and whatever have the most views, which are basically the topics about nothing. Give the people what they want, I always say.

Actually I never say that. I simply enjoy going on and on and on about absolutely nothing. And I would keep doing it even sans validation. But validation is a lovely thing. See? Kbai. More later!

PS: Forgot to mention that I’m following 510 blogs (this constantly increases), and have 333 WordPress followers. I have other followers not on WP ~ email, twitter, and just regular peeps. Love you all, mwah! Kbai for reals.

Addicted to News [mini-rant]

What is it about other people’s drama that’s so enticing to read about? While I’ll always click on a cute kitty story, I find myself drawn even more to the negative news loops like a gawker at a traffic accident. Even when I already know the gist, I’ll click to see yet another POV ~ and then be disgusted with myself for wasting my own time. Stop!

Whether it’s politics or entertainment (not that there’s much diff), I am a glutton for punishment, stuffing myself at the 24-hour buffet of stupid “news.” And then I have the nerve to whine right here on my own blarg that wah wah I can’t find the time to write fiction any longer.

I told myself that quitting Facebook would free up loads of extra time, and it has, but I’ve been spending it reading about the Karjenners. Gahhh.

But seriously, Kylie is cuter sans the fillers.

Ch-ch-changes

I just downloaded the WordPress app and so far it seems fabulous! They’ve really improved it since I tried it a zillion years ago. It takes a lot of motivation for me to deviate from my habits, so this is a big deal, blogging from an app. Truth be told, I’m a bit resistant to apps in general, misliking the idea of cluttering up my phone with icons. Why can’t I just use my browser? But this WP app is very nice. Very nice indeed. Of course, now I’ll need to d/l more apps to even out the row, but never mind that.

My motivation is partly due to the fact that blogging from a phone browser is rather clunky, and while I have a semi-solution in my old Kindle Fire, it’s still imperfect. (Hard to access media from there.) Also, I like using one device. I already have a sweet Kindle for reading and the Fire is pure backup, which I like to keep at home.

Isn’t this fascinating? I thought my fans would be enthralled with an OCD data dump.

I’m feeling good about all the things I’ve abandoned along the path toward enlightenment, or death, whichever comes first ~ husbands, real estate, dating sites, Facebook, fiction writing, and thigh highs. Thank gawd I never have to wear stupid thigh highs again! What a dumb invention.

Oh, and sushi. Blech!