Tag Archives: avocado

Fun Challenge: Grocery List

Grocery list

Shocking right? What a mess! Welp, I don’t keep it neatly on my phone like the Bag Lady does. I grab any piece of paper and start scribbling as I think of things, using whichever writing implement hasn’t been batted under the fridge by the kitty. I also write in code that even I sometimes have trouble deciphering later.

S&C is shampoo and conditioner, obviously. Lysol wipes, coffee, tissue, green beans, and… guam? Yes, apparently I’m picking up Guam this weekend. Hope they have it at Von’s and it’s not over my credit card limit.

Dunno why I wrote my beverages as an outline, though of course Diet Coke is the most important one. Don’t worry, haters! I’ve reserved lots of comments so you can rant about the evils of diet soda. Please do go on. Now, in your corner is a recent study correlating diet soda to early death… but also regular (sugary) soda is linked as well. Soda is bad, mmkay? Always remember though: correlation is not causation.

Also, if you didn’t know… milk is bad (fat). Juice is bad (sugar). Booze is bad (duh). And even water is bad ~ polluted and full of micro-plastics and hormones and fluoride, which now has been proven to lower IQ. OMG, the wackadoos were right! What else have they been right about? Maybe the earth is flat! Maybe we didn’t go to the moon! Maybe Elvis is still alive! The possibilities are endless…

What can we drink then? Conservatives have liberal tears slurped up through plastic straws, but what about the rest of us? Personally, I alternate my Diet Coke with Bai and Snapple (both also diet) until it’s cold (under 70 degrees F), at which point I’ll switch mainly to hot black tea with a splash of milk. Generally, I’ll have one large cup of coffee per day. Mm, hot drinks coming soon. September is annoying because of this heat forcing me to drink so many cold things. Hurry up autumn!

I’ve been out of avos for days, which is so sad (maybe I was crying when I wrote it down, hence the blur?). Avocados are my favorite food and I like to have one a day when I can. I’ve been known to have an avo for breakfast. Just plain, with salt. I’m not a fancy person.

This is also why I don’t date anymore ~ who would want to have a relationship with someone that eats avocados for breakfast? Besides a raccoon… πŸ₯‘

~*~

Β© 2019 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

It Could Have Been Worse

“It could have been raining.” (Young Frankenstein)

Raining

That would have definitely been worse! Let me explain… and hopefully you’ll smile. I know I had to or else.

Ten days ago I smashed my toe on the wheel of my bed. It still hurts a lot, and the top of my foot is so bruised and swollen I can’t wear closed shoes without limping, but luckily I have two pairs of old lady Naturalizer sandals (one black, one beige), so I’m okay until it’s cold. I guess it doesn’t matter if my toe is broken or not, since it’s straight (not that there’s anything wrong with gay toes or bi toes or whatever… I don’t remember all the things). It’ll heal when it heals.

Shrug

Continuing with the “most accidents occur in the home” theme, last Saturday I stabbed myself while cutting an avocado. I don’t mean I sliced my finger; I mean I literally stabbed myself in the left palm. I couldn’t believe it happened. Bad things happen so quickly ~ have you noticed? I’m like wait, no, I didn’t mean to be so stupid! Welp, too late. So much blood. Probably because of all the Advil I’ve been taking for my foot… but the stab had to clot sooner or later, was my theory. I’m a logical person. I did not want to go to an ER full of germs. 😷

Happily, I had a handy dandy first aid kit in my bathroom, yay! It expired in 2003, wtf? Seriously, how did that happen? But the gauze and bandages were still good. I fixed up my hand and went to CVS. Wow, there are so many fancy bandages out now! It’s really hard to choose. I bought a few different ones, tape, some medical gloves (to keep my hand dry while washing my hair, you pervs), etc. Now I have a splendid pile of supplies and feel ready for the next disaster.

First Aid Kit

Okay then. Last night, I came home from work, thought everything was going as well as could be expected. Foot was the same, but at least I had comfy sandals. Hand was healing nicely. I got out of my car and saw a window screen on the ground. That’s funny, I thought, how would a window screen…

Omg…

BAD KITTY!!!!! 🐱

I grabbed the screen (with my good hand) and ran hobbled upstairs. Oh, thank God, Gatsby was still in the apartment! All these years, I’ve made sure to leave the main windows open only two inches when I’m not there because I can’t trust him not to go crazy at a bird, but this last year he’s been much calmer and I’ve been leaving them open 24/7 when it’s hot.

Obviously, his mellowness at the windows has all been a ruse. His intent all along has been to attack one of the screens and knock it out. Luckily, he forgot to escape… or if he did, he returned. How would I know? 😳

By far my largest fear is losing my kitty; he’d be an orphan all alone out there with speeding cars and hungry coyotes ~ how long would my sweetie last? 😒 But what if something had come in that wide open window? A big scary bird… a flying elephant on laxatives … a horde of killer bees… a sharknado? Gahhh!

Hence the Young Frankenstein quote.

Gatsby kitty cat

~*~

Β© 2019 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Green Is Good

Hope you enjoy some more greenery in your feed for Terri’s Sunday Stills photo challenge. πŸ€πŸ™‚πŸ’š

Five for Friday

Here is the next set of pics for the October photo challenge. I did 1-5 last Friday and 6-7 on Sunday.

8. Branches:

9. Scarlet:

10. Ten:

11. Leaves:

12. Start with T:

Octolages

As is my way, I’m doing City Sonnet’s photo challenge in one swell foop. This time, the whole month will be right here in one poast! How exciting! Since I didn’t want to overwhelm my readers with 31 full-size pics in predictable order, I mashed them up in collages. First, I will poast the key, and then I’ll show you my photo art. You can match them up if you like, or simply enjoy for a minute and return to your normally scheduled life.

Things People Grow

Apart

Avocados

Blackberry hearts

~*~

For Cee’s photo challenge.

Me? Weird??

The what-if prompt is weird things to eat and honestly I don’t think I eat anything weird! But here’s the actual weird thing: other people have often commented on my “weird” eating habits.

1. I’ve gone through many vegetarian phases, which lots of meat eaters find odd. Not sure why it’s strange to prefer a yummy baked potato and veggies over a hunk of rotting flesh, but whatevs. I’m not vegetarian at the moment and have enjoyed a few steak meals this year. Mmm dead cow.

2. With rare exceptions, I don’t like soup unless I’m sick. It’s just so salty and boring. Every bite tastes the same. Spoon after spoon after spoon. Yawnnnn.

3. I used to eat cottage cheese and salsa, and there is literally nothing strange about this when people always have cheese and/or sour cream with salsa in their tacos and burritos. But since no one thinks of cottage cheese as part of a Mexican dish, it’s me being “weird.” Um no. It’s me being innovative, hello. But I don’t eat this now because salsa = heartburn. Aging, bah.

4. I often save dessert for breakfast. Here’s the thing. Dessert is yummy, but it has the calories of an entire meal and I don’t want to eat an entire meal after I’ve eaten a meal. It’s not enjoyable. So, why not take it home and enjoy it the next day when I’m hungry again? Why is this weird? It’s not!

5. As I’ve said, I don’t like grapefruit or oranges. Apparently everyone else does. Goody, more for you!

6. I eat peanut butter on a spoon for a snack. Preferably creamy PB, but I will eat crunchy if that’s all there is. Again, I see nothing weird about this. I have gradually begun to appreciate a drop of honey on my PB ~ better than a c00kie! ~ though this is best done over the sink.

7. I love love love avocados πŸ₯‘! Mere words cannot do justice to their deliciousness. I can eat a whole one with salt & pepper sometimes for dinner with nothing else and be perfectly satisfied. I do admit this is probably out of the ordinary.

8. Unlike our gobblement, I’m not conflicted about eggs. I love them and they love me, no changing my mind every damn year. Now that I’m not eating so much bread, I’m making nomlettes more often, usually with cheese unless I forget to buy cheese. Sometimes I’ll make scrambled or poached eggs and veggies. Other times I’ll make hard-boiled eggs to bring to work with salad stuffs.

Obviously there’s nothing weird about liking eggs, but invariably there will be some troll who will say oh well if you are sad about the way cute cuddly animals are treated, what about poor egg-laying chickens? It’s true I wish all animals were treated better, and my heart ❀️ goes out to all the creatures, even the ones I eat, but [excuses]. The great thing about WordPress is the troll blocking feature, I always say. πŸ˜€

Happy weekend nomz!

Red, Red Mine [CFFC]

Today’s fun photo challenge is red, and even though I don’t have much clothing in the red range, I do have quite a few photos, mostly of food. Yes, I did archive all my Instagrams before closing my account, you lucky ducks. πŸ˜‚

One of my favorite meals: avocado and tomato, served simply with salt and pepper.

Red against azure, for a striking contrast.

My lucky rainbow sand-dude. Daughter1 made him for me when I began my current job 17 years ago, and he’s been on my desk at work ever since.

Life is just a bowl of strawberries, or something like that.

Gatsby guarding my sparkly red shoes.

Red velvet birthday cake, delicious!

Red velvet wine, so smooth. Alas, I’ve given all alcohol up because of migraines. πŸ™

Red taillights and an ironic personalized plate.

On Sex and Poetry

Here’s a weird thing that I may have discussed before, but I don’t recall because Alzheimers, so we will go through it again.

Me and my two commenters, that is. (Rude.)

When I began writing a suspense novel, no one asked me if I’d ever committed a murder or had one attempted on me. No one asked if there had been any murder incidences among close friends or family members. People assumed the story was fictional, which of course it was. (BWAHAHAHA fools.)

But when I write a romance/erotica story I invariably get someone going uh duh is that YOU? Are you writing from experience heh heh heh? Gah, so annoying. At least when I wrote the crazy dragon thing no one asked that. But why not? I don’t understand why no one asked if I’d had sex with a dragon or at least an alligator. Weirddd.

But I write a threesome and it’s all BAM… did you do that??? Like I have enough imagination to write about a freaking dragon but not two chicks getting it on with some dude. Nope nope. I must have been one of them.

And poetry… geez, give me a break. Poems can be totally fictional, hello! Mine mostly are, though I do sometimes eat avocados.

Mmm avocado…

It’s all lies and guacamole around here, my peeps. Trust me, I’m a liar.

SL&G

Ode to My Avo

Oh nubby green frogskin
Gleaming dully in my fruitbowl
You split with a pop
Under my old serrated knife
I saw around your oval
And twist your seams apart
To find perfect unmarred flesh
Yellow-green and fresh
Odors of earth and sun
Promises of spring
Rise softly after a year of sorrow
Sprinkle salt and pepper
This my solitary supper
Spoonripe bites
Silky as creamcake
All dreams are possible

Froot