Tag Archives: anger

The Struggle Is Real (Green)!

Some friends and I decided to hang out Sunday, so naturally I had to buy some festive apparel. I know, you’re thinking… Paula, don’t you already have St. Patrick’s Day themed stuff from prior years? Well, not really! I have a hat, I guess, but that’s about it. I wore my greenish shirt on Friday to work, and it’s not that festive besides. I have a lime green sweater, but March 17th isn’t really about lime green, now is it? I used to have shamrock socks, but they got all holey. ๐Ÿ˜ข

So, Friday night I went onto the Target app, like you do, to commence shopping. There wasn’t anything I liked much in my local store, so I moseyed on over to Huntington Beach. Eh, a couple shirts were okay, and there were some cute socks and earrings. Then I had a brainstorm to try the men’s department. Well! The guys had adorable shirts! Beautiful green ones with the Lucky Charms logo (we just got plain white), and OMG a kitty shirt, black and white, with a widdle green hat!!! Obviously, I had to get the kitty shirt. Why wouldn’t they make it for women/juniors? Who even can figure out the logic to these things? ๐Ÿ™„

I ordered the shirt, socks, and earrings, paid for all that, and planned to pick them up the next morning. I was very happy… for about 5 minutes until I received an email saying those items were no longer available in Huntington Beach. Or Costa Mesa. WHAT? I began searching the whole area on the handy-dandy app. They said I could buy all the same things in Irvine on Barranca. FINE. I was very happy again… for like 5 minutes. Then they said I could only have the shirt. No earrings, no socks. Wtfff? What about the Target in Irvine Spectrum? NO. Westminster Mall. NO NO NO! You can’t have any festive socks or earrings. Get over it. ๐Ÿ˜ก

Ooh, I was so mad. This wasn’t the end of it though. I stayed up late, all energized by my fury. First thing Saturday morning I went right over to the Barranca Target and got my shirt ~ there was a minor drama however because they couldn’t find it at Guest Services and I was about to have a heart attack, but then they did, so I was okay. I went to Peet’s after that for coffee and a PB cookie (yummo). The reason Target was out of green things is because they took them away to make room for Easter things. I stopped at CVS, which sometimes has fun socks, but they too were all Easterized before St. Patrick’s Day. Kohl’s had one little sad display of green dishtowels. ANNOY! ๐Ÿ”ฅ

But then… then I went to Party City. And guess what? They had tons of St. Patrick’s Day stuff still on the shelves Because… because PEOPLE WANT TO BUY IT! And unlike Target, CVS, and Kohl’s, Party City likes to make money from people who want to buy things! What a unique and interesting concept! Stores keeping things in stock that people want to buy. Huh. Who would have thought? Capitalism at its finest, folks, right here in Huntington Beach. Or over there rather. Up there? Idk. Directions confuse me. WHATEVER! I bought green things, which is the point. Yayyy!!! ๐Ÿ€๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ€

The Friday Four

A Guy Called Bloke Production

1] What are your strengths and of your strengths โ€“ how have they helped you throughout your life?

– I show up and do the thing. It’s amazing how often this is what it takes, day after boring day, to do okay, as opposed to the magic pill so many seem to seek. I’m the plodding tortoise, never the sexy bunny. But I am all right while others have burnt out; a minuscule number have had stellar success.

2] What are your weaknesses and how have they or have they hindered your successes in anyway and what have you done to overcome them to rue your day?

– I’m easily hurt/angered. I deal with that by socializing less and less and never dating at all now. I suppose I could go for years of counseling to try to overcome this and be heartless like others but nah. Books and kitty will do just fine.

3] What makes people believe absurd conspiracy theories or alternatively are all conspiracy theories absurd? Answer which sits best with you.

– A conspiracy requires a whole bunch of people motivated to keep a secret for a long time. For some of the conspiracies out there, we’re talking decades or even hundreds of years. Given human nature, that’s nuts ~ people talk and brag. Since almost all these “conspiracies” are easily found via a quick google, they aren’t even secrets! So, what’s the conspiracy then? Nothing. If any exist, we don’t know what they are, by definition.

Why? Well, I was actually curious about this because I dated a couple wackadoos who believed various idiocies. It’s a form of control freakish behavior ~ OCD. You try to make sense of a chaotic world by latching onto a theory in order to label and categorize things in little boxes so life doesn’t feel so messy.

In the same way that another OCD sufferer might need to ritually wash their hands 27 times before leaving the house or drive down certain streets to make sure there isn’t a dead body lying in the road, etc., the conspiracy buff hangs out on certain sites, gobbling up tidbits of info to reinforce whatever belief makes him feel that one tiny corner of the world is a little bit neater, whether it’s the gobblement hiding evidence of alien spaceships or Hillary, frail and near death, kidnapping kids out of pizza parlors.

4] How important are morals in a healthy society? What are the most important morals for citizens to have?

– Morality is subjective. We agree on certain fundamentals and then create a code of laws around them. It sounds simple, but it’s become complicated. When we allow some people to disobey laws, whether desperately poor folks illegally crossing the border or wealthy folks cheating on their taxes, the system becomes diminished for everyone. Why should I, Jane Doe, respect the law when all these other people don’t have to? Why shouldn’t I just steal a pair of earrings when no one is looking?

It’s easy to say that morality and the law are two different things, but that’s for the philosophy books. When we live in reality, we have to agree to abide by a code of conduct in order to be part of a civilized society. Society can’t function if everyone stands around going hmm what is the moral thing to do in this circumstance, let me pray, or consult my favorite philosophy website. Should I stab this annoying person or not? Isn’t it easier if we all agree upfront not to stab each other, and if anyone does stab just because someone won’t move up in line, no matter how annoying that is, they will get punished?

To quote Jim Carrey in Liar Liar: “Stop breaking the law, asshole!”

Technically speaking… [FPQ #6]

This weekโ€™s provocative question came up when I read an article that talked about how the extent that Russia used social media to influence the 2016 presidential election in the United States and the Brexit vote in Great Britain was more extensive than what was originally thought and that such disinformation and misinformation on social media sites continues almost unabated to this day.

With that in mind, hereโ€™s this weekโ€™s provocative question.

โ€œIs technological advancement a net positive or a net negative?โ€

If you choose to participate, write a post with your response to the question. Once you are done, tag your post with #FPQ and create a pingback to this post if you are on WordPress. Or you can simply include a link to your post in the comments.

And most important, have fun.

I am wavering on this week’s question, which is what makes it so provocative, I suppose.

On the one hand, technology has done amazingly wonderful things for the world. We’re able to grow more food, educate more people, cure more diseases, prevent more deaths in childbirth, respond faster in emergencies, etc. And we continue to advance exponentially in so many areas of science and medicine and engineering.

On the other hand, we’re as shitty toward our fellow humans, animals, and the planet we all live on as we’ve ever been. And now we can use technology to facilitate our terribleness. Instead of simply mocking some poor soul in a school hallway, we use social media to torment him 24/7 until he commits suicide. Sick people upload vids of themselves torturing animals for the amusement of other sickos around the world. And we all have so many gadgets and chargers and crap filling our lives, and we must have the latest versions, tossing the previous ones into the ever-expanding trash heap covering our earth and oceans.

Blech! ๐Ÿคฎ

I haven’t even touched the part about our elections and the Rooskies and the hot new cold war and how our life spans are declining from sitting on our asses texting all day and how Spectrum has the goddamn nerve to increase my price yet again after my price increase last year when they switched me to “high speed” for people who game on multiple TV’s when I’m just a single person who doesn’t game on any device and singles are always being financially penalized for multi-person households who hog all the resources and pollute up the planet but at least Edison sends me a report card every month saying good job which is worth fuck all but hey.

What was this poast about again? Oh. It’s from Fandango. We hate Trump! Hells to the yeah! What do I win? ๐Ÿ˜‚

Monday Meandering

It was bothering me that my full-size bitmojis appeared on my iPhone reader as humongous pictures dropping off the sides of the screen. Other bloggers’ pics do the same, btw ~ not photographs, which seem to know how to behave themselves, but graphics grabbed from the web, which do not. Anyway, I’ve been resizing mine to medium in the app but haven’t noticed a satisfactory difference, so that’s why I went down to thumbnail on this one. It just bugs me when pics are off. Now the thumbnail will look weird when I view my blog on the web… sigh. ๐Ÿ˜œ

*

I finally figured out why my YouTube vids weren’t previewing properly ~ when I take the link from the YouTube app, it’s a shortlink. I then have to paste it in a browser to get a real link that creates a preview. What a royal pain in the ass. Is there any more annoying problem in the world today, I ask you? Oh, for the halcyon daze of olde when we didn’t have the convenience of apps to bitch about and had to trudge 5 miles in the cybersnow every time we wanted to copypasta any damn thing. ๐Ÿ™„

*

I was just about to stop at Target after work on Friday night to buy a space heater when I remembered I had one. And it wasn’t hidden away in a closet ~ it’s right next to the TV cabinet. This is what happens when the unused spaces in your brain get old and frozen. ๐Ÿฅถ

*

My MO in Blogland is not to keep score cuz that’s just annoying and frustrating. I follow around 700 blogs and only 500 or so follow me. But who is MO anyway and why am I letting him set precedent? This I began to wonder today as I unfollowed a few bloggers in my feed who never like any of my poasts. Pffft.

To each their own, but if all a blogger does it repost old stuff, and not interact with me, I’m going to be faster with the unfollow click. I mean, I go to the trouble of writing fresh new boring crap for you guys every single day! I don’t want my feed filled with a parade of moldy recyclables. If I see I’ve already hearted it… grrrr!

Seriously one guy reposts his half-dozen sensual love letters to his “goddess” every night and I’m just BARF ALREADY! Write something new to her, dude. Geez. ๐Ÿคฎ

*

I just looked up the definition of cartoon cuz I wasn’t sure what counted. Obviously the shows we used to watch on Saturday morning, but comic strips too? Yup. And movies like Frozen? Yup. And those quickie caricatures? Yup. Also, the word comes from Italian, carta (paper), if anyone cares. First known usage was in 1671, as in a preparatory design. You’re welcome. ๐Ÿ˜œ

*

I’m on the Nextdoor app to keep track of local doings. I was motivated to download it when the OCRegister went to a pay site. I miss the OCR, gotta admit, but I’m not gonna pay. I have no paid subscriptions to anything. Nextdoor is sometimes helpful/interesting, but Twitter is actually more on top of breaking emergencies. Of course there are trolls and idiots and assholes on ND because it is social media. People won’t follow rules and simply must jabber on about “the wall” and whatever other stupid BS pops into their heads. ๐Ÿคฌ

Naturally there are the sea lion men, barking questions at women, only to tell them that their opinions are invalid. I ran into one of these jerks this weekend who told me I can’t have an opinion on my city after “only” living here 5 years when he’s been here 25. I muted him. It’s too bad they are only mutes and not blocks like Twitter. I would prefer it if he was not able to see and/or reply to me again. Same goes for anyone I mute in the future.

This is one of the things that makes it hard for women to express themselves online (not to mention in meatspace obviously). You have to constantly worry about angering some wacko man, especially if he’s local. Who even knows what might set some lunatic off into a rage? Idk if this guy is totally fine or a nutball, but I got a bad vibe, and so I let him have the last word because I see from other threads that it’s important to him. And I didn’t insult him like another woman did; I just quietly faded away. I’m not embarrassed to admit that I’m scared of men who seem trollish and unhinged. We read stories all the time about women being stalked and attacked by nutjobs. And crazy men are everywhere. We’re never safe. ๐Ÿ˜ข

No, I’m not being overly dramatic. Just go look up the statistics about violence against women. This is another reason why I quit using dating sites. Besides all the benignly obnoxious jerks and liars and creeps, there are rapists and con men and murderers lurking there. It’s documented. And when some rando gets angry because you reject him after chatting, how do you know which group he falls into?

Not worth the stress.

The Liars Club

Like Fandango, I’m already breaking my own rules and playing a game instead of writing, aka lying. Blame Rory and his Daily Fun Three.

Name Three…

Three of your childhood books?

– Arty The Smarty, The Velveteen Rabbit, Little House on the Prairie

Three of your best memories?

– the themed parties I did for my kids ~ forex… one Barbie/pink, one Halloween/pirates, and one backwards birthday (probably the most fun ever)

Things that are yellow and triangular?

– a slice of lemon meringue pie and a lemon square cut on the diagonal which is now two triangles if you know math which I do so that’s three right there boom ๐Ÿ’ฅ

Wishes you would like to be granted if you had a magic genie lamp?

– instant and complete elimination of all weapons that cause mass death and our ability to make more of same, eliminate pollution everywhere, fix my fucking heater since my landlord is ignoring my text ๐Ÿ˜ก

Beautiful places you have ever visited?

– Zion National Park, the Grand Canyon, Monterey, CA

Things you fall back on to make you feel better when having a bad day?

– sugar, rage, resolve

Things that best describe your family?

– smart, successful, funny (daughters & sons-in-law)

Of your favourite blogs?

– Fandango, The Haunted Wordsmith, Msjadeli (also all others, bloggers or not, who comment here regularly… much โค๏ธ)

Things you would choose if you had ten minutes in your favourite store if you didnโ€™t have to pay for them?

– three fucking heaters

Dishes you can cook in less than 15 minutes and ready to eat direct from serve?

– I don’t understand this question

Pet peeves?

– passive aggression, vehicles with obnoxious blindingly bright headlights, BMWs in general

Bird species beginning with the name G?

– gnu, goose, green parrot ๐Ÿฆœ

Of your most favourite letters from the alphabet?

– XYZ

Of the most boring things you have ever done?

– tried to read Ulysses, played Encore with geniuses, driven from Irvine to LA on a Friday night omg

Questions you would ask of your pet if you could?

– why are you so yowly, why don’t you bury your p00ps so our enemies won’t find us, why can’t you let me smoosh you when I’m cold???

Of your favourite cartoons from now or when younger?

– the Pink Panther, Rocky, Bullwinkle

Of the emoticons you use the most when writing or in social media or comments?

โค๏ธ๐Ÿ˜€๐Ÿ˜‚

Mean Genes [SOCS]

Meandering through the online dating world, starting in the fall of 2011, I was surprised to find so many mean-spirited men, supposedly looking for love. I wasn’t surprised by the truly angry guys because I knew they’d be out there ~ easy enough to give them a swerve. But out of the blue, some trollish dude would message me and criticize the glasses I wore in my photo or whatever thing. Just stupid, sarcastic stuff. Why? I mean, maybe that was a successful approach some of the time for them: start off with a critique to spur a meaningful convo. But I’d had enough criticism when married, so to me this was a misdemeanor from which there could be no recovery.

I prefer kindness and compliments, if you know what I mean. โค๏ธ๐ŸŒน๐Ÿ’‹

Carrot Cake Rant

I wasn’t looking for anything extraordinary, just a carrot cake recipe made with almond flour. Google, google, google. No! I do not want paleo recipes made without sugar (yucky) or vegan recipes made without eggs (ick). I cleverly redid my search with minus signs in front of those words.

Why are all the recipes for two-layer cakes? My annoyance is burgeoning. I minus the word layers and put in the word sheetcake. OH PARDON ME IT’S TWO WORDS. (I left the one word here to be funny. I am funny! People have said. Many people.) A million recipes appear and each one has a list of one million ingredients each. Why do I need half a thimble of magic glitter from a hummingbird’s wing to make a FUCKING CARROT CAKE? I want to take a blunt instrument and smash my computer to bits, but I can’t because my daughters gifted it to me after I destroyed my last one.

Also, why do recipe bloggers jabber on in enormous essays before the text of their recipes? NO ONE CARES about your vacation in Chattanooga or wherever the fuck to visit Aunt Mildred. Just put that on another page along with stories about your dog and your gallbladder operation. We are only here for the recipe! That’s what we googled! And no one needs to see a macro close up photo of your pan. We all know what a pan looks like. And a spatula stuck in batter. JESUS F. CHRIST.

Okay, so maybe I need a mentor to show me how to internet. Idk. Why is it so hard to find things anymore? I can’t find good vids on YouTube these days. Recipes are a pain in the ass. The only thing that still works great ~ actually better than ever ~ are maps. Google maps. I use them constantly. Not to get anywhere, silly. Why would I want to leave my apartment? (There are people out there, gahhh!) But to have the characters in my stories go places and do things.

My NaNo protagonist has to go up to Fresno for a funeral. Then she’ll be off to Aruba and it has to sound legit. I can’t go to Aruba myself to research there personally, though if anyone has been to Aruba feel free to leave me some cool deets. No deets necessary on Fresno. I’m doing great, btw… almost 6K words, hopefully 7K by the end of the day!

I did find the almond flour sheet cake carrot cake with a normal number of ingredients, if anyone cares. I will make it soon.

Nine? Iโ€™m already angry!

Fandango tagged me to choose NINE songs that would get me in the mood to kill. People need music for this? That’s my normal state of mind. But anyway… what’s up with nine? Why not eight, a fabulous number, or ten, Monk’s favorite number, which I like too? Obviously I’m irritated by NINE, and the more I think about it the murderier I feel. I just said I don’t like nine yesterday. GRRRR!

1. “JUST TO WATCH HIM DIE”

https://youtu.be/wG0fS4DoGUc

2. “How to be insensitive”

https://youtu.be/-nrGWwHalCU

3. “I’m the only one”

https://youtu.be/oCphbDRkZSo

4. “JUST GIVE ME THE MONEY!”

https://youtu.be/YUtHjOvPKT0

5. “Take another piece…”

https://youtu.be/j0f5ZG9LG6k

6. “YOU OUGHTA KNOW”

https://youtu.be/NPcyTyilmYY

7. “Betcha think this song is about you”

https://youtu.be/mQZmCJUSC6g

8. “Gonna walk all over you!”

https://youtu.be/SbyAZQ45uww

9. “I DON’T GIVE A DAMN…”

https://youtu.be/LvoV2Lfk7Qg

For the NGDGU File

It’s not an emergency but… just when I’ve gone out of my way to explicitly praise the WordPress app several times here and in comments to fellow bloggers, it’s quit working properly. I can still poast just fine, which is the most important thing, since peeps would surely have the big sads without their fix of meeee, but my reader is all screwed up.

Here’s the haps. I open it up and get a few dozen new poasts, like from the past hour. All good. Then it leaps to poasts from 12 hours ago with nothing in between! If I close out and return, I may get a few randoms from the missing hours, out of order, but… ughhh. Yesterday I didn’t get the prompt poasts, but luckily someone had a story with them all in it, so I saved that. Today I can only find the one I used in my first line. I’m missing Scott’s and Fandango’s and Sheryl’s and others.

DO NOT LIKE. Bad app is bad.

Caps & Cobras

It’s been over 6 months since I deleted Facebook and that was a brilliant move, if I do say so myself. Not only did it free up scads of time for blogging (both reading and poasting), which is so much more enjoyable than scrolling through memes and trollery, but it also eliminated a huge bunch of negativity and annoyance from my day. I can read a quick burst of what people are saying about trending topics on twitter, and that’s enough to keep me in the culture loop.

But I need to make another big change, one I’ve been resisting, out of sheer laziness, much like I avoided dumping FB for far too long. And that habit is checking the “news.” I put this in quotes because most of what I’m seeing isn’t real news at all but garbage from bubbleheads. This is beyond what Alyssa fucking Milano has to say about anything, as if I give a shit, but supposed journalists who aren’t. All they do is recycle crap from other sites and try to manipulate our feelings. I know we all know this, but I’m finally doing something about it.

I want to see stuff like natural disasters, famous people’s deaths, election results, etc., reported clearly and dispassionately. I don’t want to be told something is tragic or devastating. I can figure that out myself. If I see a photo of a celeb or their spouse, I’ll decide what to think about their looks; I don’t need to have my opinion spoonfed to me like I’m a toddler in a high chair. Wtfff?

Today I changed my news preferences to see only science and health articles, info about cats and psychology, puzzles and math, etc., along with factual reports of current events from NPR. No more opinions of how I should be terrified of Trump or believe Kavanaugh isn’t an asshole or whatever. That shit isn’t news! Kellyanne’s yapping is not news. Kanye’s blather isn’t news. I don’t care what kind of stupid hat Melania wears while she flits around doing nothing. And holy fucking shit Taylor Swift has an opinion, so let’s all bow down. ๐Ÿคฎ

I also dumped all the royals ~ I’ve been punished with nonstop “news” of them because I clicked on a few Markle stories back when. Now they’re all banned. What a bunch of bores. No, sorry, it’s not their fault the idiot press feels they must report on what little George has for lunch. And speaking of hats! The royals are bananas over hats. My god.

Anyway, I’ve been rewarded already! The first story that came up was about cannibal cobras. ๐Ÿ You might think, well sure, if they’re really hungry… tastes like chicken, right? Wrong! They like to nom up other snakes. Because why? Because a snake is really easy for another snake to eat! Bet you never thought about that. Neither did I. We were too busy reading about dumb hats to think about interesting things, such as cobras’ dietary preferences.

I’m gonna have more cool shit like this here in the future. You can hang your hat on it. Or you can keep your hat on… ๐Ÿ˜˜