Laura’s Music Challenge

Laura has a new set of music challenges for us this week. Join in!

1. Post a video of a song by a solo artist from the year you were born.

It says this song was recorded in 1960 and released in 1961, so it’s a perfect match.

2. Post a video of a song in which the video stars a once or currently popular actress or actor.

I looked up songs that had actors in the vids, and they were all new songs I didn’t know, so I’m cheating.

3. Post a video for a song that has a color in the lyrics or title.

Three Things Challenge: PL33

Welcome to the Three Things Challenge. Every day at 10PM (PST) I will post three seemingly unconnected things that will, hopefully, ignite your muse. You don’t have to use all three things if you don’t want to. There are no restrictions on length, style, genre, or anything. Simply read the prompt, see where your muse takes you, and bring us along for the ride. Use 3TC as a tag if you’d like and link back to this prompt, or post your link in the comments below so others can find you.

Happy Writing! 😀

Today’s prompt: earthquake, vanilla, pillbox

Once Upon A Blog Crime ~ Game 4

A Guy Called Bloke aka Chief Rory alerted me to some nefarious shenanigans happening in our otherwise peaceful neighborhood. It is my sworn and solemn duty as Inspector Light (my secret identity) to investigate any such disruptions to our smooth and graceful waves of daily (and nightly) postings.

Chief R informed me that unfortunately we only had the skimpiest bits of clues at this time, but I must needs make haste to find out why things were awry, askew, crooked, and cattywampus. Naturally, in order to discover why things were cattywampus, I had to bring my partner, Mr. Gatsby. 😾

My report to Chief R:

Our first stop is at Ribana of Popsicle Society, and Mr. G commences examining the popsicle sticks on the living room table. I discover with my amazing powers of investigation (aka reading the “about” section) that Ribana is from Romania, and therefore already suspect as a vampire. I immediately search for a coffin, which I do find in the bedroom, but Ribana is not in it. Who is?

It’s Jay-lin! But wait. Everything here is not what it seems, my sharpened instincts from years on dating sites tell me. Swiftly, I whip out a mirror and hold it up to Jay-lin’s pretty face. Aha! No reflection. Ribana must have turned her into a vampire too.

I check my reflection in the compact and put on some lipstick because you never know when you might “cute meet” your dream man, and as I’m doing this Mr. G meows from the kitchen. I rush in there to find Sadje making a nice healthy lunch. Or she was making lunch, but now Sadje is collapsed on the floor with lettuce and tomatoes and mushrooms all over her. Mr. G is swatting the mushrooms under the refrigerator.

“Stop that!” I scold him. “Those are evidence.”

He doesn’t listen though; he never does. I try to move the refrigerator to collect the mushrooms for my evidence bag, but it’s too heavy, which makes me suspicious. I open the refrigerator door, and there, there in the refrigerator, is the cold corpse of none other than our very own…

Lisa of All About Life! (But sadly, not now.)

Well, Chief, I know a dead body when I see one, especially with a set of bite wounds in her neck, and Lisa is definitely dead. It occurs to me at that point to check if Sadje is dead too, thank my stellar reflexes again, since she’s just about to stab me with a steak knife. Quickly, I overpower her and secure her wrists behind her back with the zip ties in my purse.

“Why were you on the floor?” I ask.

“Low blood sugar,” she says. “Fainted.”

Now I remember that Richa of iScriblr is a ghost writer, and I run up the narrow staircase to the attic to find Richa indeed writing Ribana’s vampire life story as Ribana dictates it while Richa floats around in the air with her laptop. Jay-lin is awake and with them now too, hissing at me when she sees me in the doorway.

So, Chief, we now have all the questions properly answered:

Who is the victim? Lisa

Who is the murderer? Jay-lin

Who is the location? Ribana

Who is the murder weapon? Sadje

Who is the motive? Richa

Jay-lin, a vampire agent, reps vampires to publishers who sell first-person vampire stories. Jay-lin discovered that Ribana is a vampire and got her a big advance. She hired Richa, an actual ghost writer, to write the story that Ribana dictated. Sadje stayed downstairs as a housekeeper. When Lisa, another writer, came over looking for Richa because she wanted to hire her for a project, she asked too many questions and Sadje became upset. Lisa wouldn’t leave, so Sadje hit her over the head with a cutting board. Jay-lin arose from her coffin and finished the job with a bite to the neck, which also was dinner, conveniently. 😺

~*~

I hope everyone had fun with my story and no one took offense. 💖

A2Z Blogging ~ Theme Reveal

First, please accept my apology for deleting the earlier post about A2Z April blogging. Thank you to everyone who liked and commented. I had too much multitasking going on and made a bunch of errors in the post and comments, so it’s best I begin again.

Second, I’m joining in the fun this year by committing to blog the alphabet during April. I already signed up on the official page and hope you do too. I know several of my favorite bloggers have also accepted the challenge. The more the merrier!

Third, my theme is romance reviews, specifically romantic comedies and romance novels. These will be positive reviews of some of my favorite movies and novels, nothing negative, and all my posts will be family-friendly.

Here’s a taste of what you can expect:

A. Alex and Emma, an underrated romcom gem.

B. Bet Me, one of my favorite Jennifer Crusie novels.

C. Clueless, a sweet romcom based on Jane Austen’s Emma.

I hope you will enjoy the posts, and I look forward to yours. Some interesting themes are happening! 😀

Green Is Good

Hope you enjoy some more greenery in your feed for Terri’s Sunday Stills photo challenge. 🍀🙂💚

Promptapalooza

No, PROMPTS. 🙄

Gawd.

Questions from Melanie/Sparks:

1) Do You Have Any Guilty Pleasures?

So many! My first one today is boldly copypasting this post in its entirety from Kristian so I could also knock out a pile of prompts at once. I’m sure there will be more. It’s still early.

2) What Is The Worst Pick Up Line You Ever Heard?  

“Hey.”

3) What Slang Or Trend Makes You Feel Old?

When Ariana said dipped ~ I had to look that up. Also dropped, as in an artist dropping a song, which means putting out a song. But dropped still means what it used to mean too ~ dumped, fired, etc. So, I always do a double take when I see drop.

4) What Do You Consider The Most Over-rated Song?

I don’t listen to much current music, so my pick is something like “I Will Always Love You” by Whitney Houston. 🤮

5) You Find A Book And Begin To Read Only To Discover That It Is Your Life. You Get To The Point That You Are At Now, Do You Turn The Page Knowing That You Will Not Be Able To Change The Events To Come?

Is It Going To Be Written In All Initial Caps Like This? Cuz then I hope my death comes swiftly. Hehe.

Questions from Rory

7 and Three Quarters Nutty Questions

A cowboy rode into town on Friday. He stayed in town for three days and rode out on Friday. How is that possible?

Either the horse was named Friday, or the days are lot longer there.

A rooster laid an egg on top of the barn roof. Which way did it roll?

Roosters don’t lay eggs, silly!

A truck driver is going down a one way street the wrong way, and passes at least ten cops. Why is he not caught?

Because he’s walking. And he has bagels to share. Cops love bagels ~ just ask Stan!

A farmer had 752 sheep and took one shot that got them all. How did he do it?

It was a shot of whiskey and it put him right to sleep 💤 … no more sheep to count.

What word is spelled incorrectly in every single dictionary?

Incorrectly. Also wrong is wrong.

What starts with “e” and ends with “e” but only has one letter in it?

Eve, eye, ere, eke, ewe.

What two keys can’t open any door?

Key Largo and Key West.

A man went outside in the pouring rain with no protection, but not a single hair on his head got wet. How come?

He was bald.

Would you rather be trapped in an elevator full of men with BO, three soaked dogs, a basket filled with week-old smelly socks or a box filled with used nappies?

Socks. 😳

Would you rather look like an octopus, act like an octopus or be an octopus?

It would be neat to be an octopus. I highly recommend The Soul of an Octopus. Excellent book! 🐙

If you had the world’s attention for 30 seconds, what would you say?

Buy my books!

Would you rather be able to copy and paste in real life, or undo in real life?

Undo. Or even better “restore to original settings.”

Hope someone got a laugh out of this. 😂

 

Three Things Challenge: PL32

Welcome to the Three Things Challenge. Every day at 10PM (PST) I will post three seemingly unconnected things that will, hopefully, ignite your muse. You don’t have to use all three things if you don’t want to. There are no restrictions on length, style, genre, or anything. Simply read the prompt, see where your muse takes you, and bring us along for the ride. Use 3TC as a tag if you’d like and link back to this prompt, or post your link in the comments below so others can find you.

Happy Writing! 😀

Today’s prompt: rainbow, serpent, cookie

A New You — Finish the Story Challenge

This challenge was started by Teresa, The Haunted Wordsmith and then passed to Rory, A Guy Called Bloke. Rory passed the challenge on to Kristian, who passed it to me. [Note: I edited this paragraph to apply to me after Rory reblogged my post and noted that I’d kept Kristian’s wording.]

Here is Rory’s post:

Finish The Story 2019 – #8

and here is Teresa’s original post:

https://thehauntedwordsmith.wordpress.com/2019/03/13/finish-the-story-2019-8/

store-984393_1920

Finish The Story 2019 – #8

Tailoring A New You

The small shop sat on the corner of Houston and Parker for more than a century. Any piece of clothing a person ever needed could be found there. They even sold hand stitched underwear. The Frederickson family owned the shop from the day it opened, and everyone loved the family.
It wasn’t just the customer service, low prices, and great quality that brought customers back for generations – it was the other things the Fredericksons offered. They say a new pair of clothes can change a person, and at A New You, they meant it. One had to be careful when requesting a custom suit – you didn’t want to get your specifications wrong. Why, even one misplaced check mark could have dire consequences on a person’s future.
Take Emilio for example, he …
***
Part 2 – Rory from A Guy Called Bloke

Take Emilio for example, he … had listened to his Father Fausto for years, since indeed when he had been kneehigh to a grasshopper crediting and hailing the Fredericksons or as his Father pronounced it the Frederickshons for their exquisitery and finery in being able to produce something absolutely remarkable from sometimes the most staidest of cloth and if not that then there was this magical element to the garments, you didn’t just wear the suit, the suit wore you!
Fausto, had been a young man when he had first ventured into the German tailors at the bequest of his own Father Gregorio, Emilio’s Grandfather only armed with the words – ‘Don’t judge a book by its cover Fausto, this family are from a long line of magickal tailors. They enthuse the garments with not just love and beauty, nor experience and wisdom but if l didn’t know better, l would say with their very souls and blood, indeed it is almost like wearing another person’s skin, but in suit form. For the best suit anywhere in this world, this is the only place to be”
“The moment you slip inside the fabric, it’s almost like you are a different person. My last bit of advice is you must know what you and who you want and where you want to be in life? Then the master tailor Gunther he will make you a masterpiece of craftsmanship. There will never be anything like it ever again, it will be your one and only suit from the time you start your professional life to the day you stop working, then you MUST take off that suit and return it to the family of the Frederickshons, so that they can destroy it, do you understand what l am saying to Fausto?”
“I think so Father, yes.” Fausto answered rather confusedly.
When Fausto had gone to the family tailors he had been made a suit so fine, so fitting that he never needed another suit ever again in his life, he had wanted to be rich and successful and within a very short time Fausto had become one of the cities most sought out grocers. No one had fruits or vegetables of the quality that Fausto had. No one could ever outsell him, outbid him, outsmart or outfool him. After 50 years he had built up an empire of grocery stalls that was the best in all of the Americas! Fausto had wanted his favourite and only Son Emilio to take on the family business, but Emilio needed his own power suit, his own successful three-piece so he could follow in his Father’s footsteps ………
.….except Fausto hadn’t actually asked his Son what and if he wanted to follow in his Father’s shadow, or if he wanted to lead his own life?
Of course the truth had he been asked was indeed different – Emilio wanted his Sister Alessandra to take on her Father’s business. His Sister had always been keenly astute on that side of the business, she was very taken with fruits and vegetables and herbs, she was a fabulous cook, who knew all the right ingredients to make each dish spectacular – she was in her own rights their families best chef! You see Emilio, well he had other interests, and they didn’t involve cucumbers, broccoli or marrows – he used to play with bananas and pretend they were guns …. and even more recently he had made friends with Alphonse who had even bigger dreams. Alphonse had at one time been a Five Points Gang member and was shrewd, he was also closely associated with the notorious Johnny Torrio. Alphonse himself was a right ‘snorky’, and also used the Frederickshons for his own suits, but he had many made and needed more than one, for his many shades of personality and success. Snorky was the terms for ‘sharp dresser’ and Emilio wanted to be like Alphonse too!
The year was 1923, the location was Chicago and Emilio and Alphonse walked into the Frederickshons Tailors where Gunther upon seeing them, greeting them both, “Emilio, your Papa Fausto said you would be stopping by with your new friend, but l never knew, this was the type of suit you wanted!” Turning to Alphonse, “Mr Capone it is so good to see you again, a new suit is it?”
” Gunther, not at all, l want you to outfit my new boy here, Emilio, tell the man what you want?”
Emilio, smiled a big proud toothy grin and said …..

Part 3 – Kristian’s Addition

“I want to look drop dead gorgeous” Emilio said. He liked the ladies, but so far in his life, they seemed to realise he was a low life scumbag who liked gangs and violence and so stayed well away.

Unfortunately the Magical Tailor, Gunther, was become a trifle deaf. He was coming up to two hundred years old and was way past retirement age. Being slightly deaf, he failed to hear Emilio’s last word. You would have thought that it would have occurred to him that Emilio’s request was rather strange and therefore he must have misheard, but senility was creeping in, so he crafted the suit according to the very request he had heard.

Within a week of wearing it, Emilio had dropped dead.

The consequences of Gunther’s auditory and mental deterioration were even more drastically displayed when poor Tristram Van De Gould went in for a fitting.

He asked for a waistcoat that would make him appear slimmer, what he ended up with was a straightjacket that prevented him from eating at all. He died of an emptystomach.

If you thought things couldn’t get any worse, you were wrong because next……..

 

Part 4 ~ Paula’s Part

The taxicab stopped in front of the shop and a disparate group of Americans piled out. “Hey!” yelled the driver. “Someone needs to pay me!”

“Someone pay the poor guy, for Pete’s sake,” Bernie said. “What’s the matter with you people?” And he walked into the shop, bumping his head on the door. “Owww.”

“I’d love to pay him,” Kamala said, “but I gave all my money to that sweet little girl at the airport who said she was homeless.” She went into the shop too. Amy and Beto and Liz ran after her. “Wait for us!” they shouted.

Joe rolled his eyes. “Geez, I’ll pay him. I always get stuck with the check when I go out with those guys,” he said to the cabbie. “It’s just the weirdest thing!”

“I sympathize, buddy,” the cabbie said. “My in-laws are exactly the same. Have fun shopping.”

Trailing after the others into the shop, Joe found them already arguing with the suit maker, who was nearly deaf, apparently. Everyone was yelling. “CALM DOWN!” Joe shouted.

“I was here first,” Bernie insisted. “I should get to order my suit first.”

“Fine.” Amy plopped down in a chair. “I’ll just sit here and have some of their free juice. Can I drink it out of one of these shoes, Gunther?”

The ancient tailor heard his name and turned in her direction. “Ehh, no one here named Sue, honey. We have a Lucy, but she’s off today.”

“‘Scuse me!” Beto said. “But we don’t call women honey anymore. I got in trouble for making some jokes earlier, so now I intend to be an annoying sourpuss wherever I go. I think my suit should reflect my new personality of a serious man who has meditated deeply upon–”

Bernie waggled a finger in his face. “MY TURN MY TURN MY TURN!”

“Ahem,” Kamala said. “This is a perfect example of why we need a woman in charge. Men just feel so entitled to everything. It’s definitely time for women to show how things can be done in a more orderly and peaceful manner.”

“You hussy!” Liz cried. “You winked at my husband at the rally last month.”

“What are you talking about?” Kamala said. “Have you gone off the reservation again?”

“LOL!” Amy laughed, coughing on her shoe juice.

Beto tried so hard not to laugh he waved his arms around madly and knocked over a rack of ties. Joe picked them all up.

Liz showed Kamala a video on her phone. “See? There you are winking at my sweetie.”

“I was crying,” Kamala told her. “I have hay fever. I had to take a Benadryl.”

Gunther hobbled over and said, “Alrighty then, dearies. Who’s next? I’ve measured the men.”

Kamala went next. Liz said to Amy, “I don’t even know why we’re here. It seems so silly, but I didn’t want to be at a disadvantage when you all said you were getting these special suits made.”

“I know, right?” Amy shrugged. “They’re supposed to be magical, or something.”

“Hillary had a suit made here,” Joe said. “But then she didn’t wear it. I’m not sure why. I’d ask her, but she won’t talk to me anymore. Who can even understand women, am I right?”

They just glared at him. “Oopsy,” Beto said. “Uncle Joe needs to go for retraining. Perhaps some yoga.”

“What?” Joe looked around, bewildered. “What did I do?”

“This shop needs to unionize,” Bernie announced. “Who’s with me on that?”

Liz frowned. “I don’t see any employees, Bern. Plus, it’s another country. They don’t need your help.”

“Everyone needs my help!” Bernie waggled his finger at her.

Gunther finished up with Liz and Kamala, and now all six Americans had been measured and fitted for their custom suits. They had told Gunther exactly what their hopes were for the coming year and he would take that into account when designing their apparel. He tallied up the final bill and brought it back out to the front.

“All the suits should be ready in three weeks,” he said to the group. “I can have them air mailed for an additional fee, since I know everyone has to zip back across the pond to his and her busy lives. Now did you want separate cheques?”

Everyone looked at Joe. He sighed and took out his Amex. “No, I’ll put it on my card for the travel points. We’ll settle up later.”

“Thanks, Joe!” everyone said. “You’re the best! We’ll PayPal you!”

The suits did arrive three weeks later, as promised. But…

 

And here I pass the story on to….

Fandango, of course!

Rules–
Copy the story below as it appears when you receive it (and the rules please)
Add somehow to the story in which ever style and length you choose
Tag only 1 person
If you choose to not participate or finish the story, please comment/tag this post so that I know.

Song Lyric Sunday: School

Out of Jim’s prompts for this week, I choose school. One of my favorite songs from Steely Dan is “My Old School,” which is what I’m sharing today. It was written by Donald Fagen and Walter Becker in 1973 for the album Countdown to Ecstasy. The lyrics are about a drug bust at Bard College (“Annandale”) and reference the local prosecutor at the time, Daddy Gee ~ better known as G. Gordon Liddy. (Wikipedia)

I remember the thirty-five sweet goodbyes
When you put me on the Wolverine up to Annandale
It was still September
When your daddy was quite surprised
To find you with the working girls in the county jail
I was smoking with the boys upstairs when I
Heard about the whole affair, I said oh no
William and Mary won’t do

Well, I did not think the girl
Could be so cruel
And I’m never going back
To my old school

Oleanders growing outside her door
Soon they’re gonna be in bloom up in Annandale
I can’t stand her
Doing what she did before
Living like a gypsy queen in a fairy tale
Well, I hear the whistle but I can’t go, I’m gonna
Take her down to Mexico, she said oh no
Guadalajara won’t do

Well, I did not think the girl
Could be so cruel
And I’m never going back
To my old school

California tumbles into the sea
That’ll be the day I go back to Annandale
Tried to warn you
About Chino and Daddy Gee
But I can’t seem to get to you through the U.S. Mail
Well I hear the whistle but I can’t go, I’m gonna
Take her down to Mexico, she said oh no
Guadalajara won’t do

Well, I did not think the girl
Could be so cruel
And I’m never going back
To my old school

The Struggle Is Real (Green)!

Some friends and I decided to hang out Sunday, so naturally I had to buy some festive apparel. I know, you’re thinking… Paula, don’t you already have St. Patrick’s Day themed stuff from prior years? Well, not really! I have a hat, I guess, but that’s about it. I wore my greenish shirt on Friday to work, and it’s not that festive besides. I have a lime green sweater, but March 17th isn’t really about lime green, now is it? I used to have shamrock socks, but they got all holey. 😢

So, Friday night I went onto the Target app, like you do, to commence shopping. There wasn’t anything I liked much in my local store, so I moseyed on over to Huntington Beach. Eh, a couple shirts were okay, and there were some cute socks and earrings. Then I had a brainstorm to try the men’s department. Well! The guys had adorable shirts! Beautiful green ones with the Lucky Charms logo (we just got plain white), and OMG a kitty shirt, black and white, with a widdle green hat!!! Obviously, I had to get the kitty shirt. Why wouldn’t they make it for women/juniors? Who even can figure out the logic to these things? 🙄

I ordered the shirt, socks, and earrings, paid for all that, and planned to pick them up the next morning. I was very happy… for about 5 minutes until I received an email saying those items were no longer available in Huntington Beach. Or Costa Mesa. WHAT? I began searching the whole area on the handy-dandy app. They said I could buy all the same things in Irvine on Barranca. FINE. I was very happy again… for like 5 minutes. Then they said I could only have the shirt. No earrings, no socks. Wtfff? What about the Target in Irvine Spectrum? NO. Westminster Mall. NO NO NO! You can’t have any festive socks or earrings. Get over it. 😡

Ooh, I was so mad. This wasn’t the end of it though. I stayed up late, all energized by my fury. First thing Saturday morning I went right over to the Barranca Target and got my shirt ~ there was a minor drama however because they couldn’t find it at Guest Services and I was about to have a heart attack, but then they did, so I was okay. I went to Peet’s after that for coffee and a PB cookie (yummo). The reason Target was out of green things is because they took them away to make room for Easter things. I stopped at CVS, which sometimes has fun socks, but they too were all Easterized before St. Patrick’s Day. Kohl’s had one little sad display of green dishtowels. ANNOY! 🔥

But then… then I went to Party City. And guess what? They had tons of St. Patrick’s Day stuff still on the shelves Because… because PEOPLE WANT TO BUY IT! And unlike Target, CVS, and Kohl’s, Party City likes to make money from people who want to buy things! What a unique and interesting concept! Stores keeping things in stock that people want to buy. Huh. Who would have thought? Capitalism at its finest, folks, right here in Huntington Beach. Or over there rather. Up there? Idk. Directions confuse me. WHATEVER! I bought green things, which is the point. Yayyy!!! 🍀💖🍀