Category Archives: Noodling

Weekend Quickie

bitmoji saturday

Rory offers up another weekend quickie and I have time to squeeze it in between my rounds of social engagements, of which there are none.

Are you more of a sarcastic or pleasant personality or alternatively a mixture of the two pending your mood of the day?

It depends on the circumstances. I’m mostly pleasant around other people, especially at work. Alone, I mutter to myself nonstop, ranting, cursing, snarking, etc. I try not to be too sarcastic in public, since sarcasm is an unattractive trait and exposes the weakness of an argument. If you have the facts, there’s no need to be a jerk. Sarcasm is not equal to real humor, despite what men on dating sites seem to believe. See what I did there? Oops.
We live in a world of data, knowledge and information – but do we always have the right sort available at the right time?

We certainly do not. Take nutrition, for example. How many times have we been told different or flat-out incorrect information regarding food? And then it turns out certain “studies” were funded by the same industries they touted. Eggs good, eggs bad, repeat endlessly. Carbs good, fat bad, carbs bad, fat good. On and on.
What are three of your favourite ‘go to’ websites [not blogs] for information or relaxation?

I like playing Microsoft Solitaire card games and doing Happy Color pictures for relaxation. I mostly go to the LA Times, CNN, or ABC for news.
How lucky are you?

I’m pretty damn lucky to have been born a white person in the USA. Anything else is frosting on the cupcake.
What’s the best advice you have ever received from a friend?

Not a friend, but an ex: “Sometimes the best thing to do is… nothing.” This applies to many situations, most particularly those in which you are having trouble making a decision. Just wait it out.
You have five minutes to pack a bag with the absolute essentials to be away for a long weekend in an unknown location … what do you pack and why?

Phone, charger, change of clothes plus an extra jacket, teabags, Clif bars. Give kitties extra food and water before I go…

~*~

©️2021 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Inauguration Week Share

Bitmoji world

Melanie starts our week off right with a new set of Q’s…

1. Why do we dream?

I consider it a data dump… to get rid of all the bits and pieces of broken code that float around our minds.

2. Do you think a person’s name influences the person they become?

No.

3. Does hardship make a person stronger? (example: What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger)

Sometimes. Being a lonely child forced me to find ways to enjoy things by myself, which turns out to be a strength. I’m glad I’m not needy for companionship. But hardship can also make you more fragile, like if you were deprived of proper nutrition or medical care…

3. Why do we judge ourselves by our intentions, but judge others by their actions?

Because we are all hypocrites! But seriously it makes survival sense to favor oneself and one’s family over others. I don’t actually see a problem with this most of the time, at least in public. Engage in berating yourself or your spouse in the privacy of your home…

4. GRATITUDE SECTION (Always Optional) Feel free to share some gratitude in the form of images, photos or writing. Thanks!

Crystal Cove
Grateful for nearby Crystal Cove 💙

~*~

©️2021 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

What Is The EFFING Point? #PoiMe

pointless meanderings

I’m super bummed out again. I don’t know why I thought Medium would be a good place for my writing ~ not only am I never going to make money there (beyond pocket change), but there’s almost no camaraderie. There can’t be when you need to read as much as possible, react briefly, and move on… hoping others see you and add you to their following list. I’ll never get as many hits as a tech writer or someone who goes on (and on) about politics or making money or whatever the hell people can’t resist clicking. Barely anyone cares about poetry or fiction or personal essays. It makes me so annoyed I refuse to click on the “trending” articles ~ why is the Medium algorithm helping the popular writers, those who jabber on about tech and money, instead of assisting others in becoming visible? Welp, I’m thinking of canceling my membership ~ why should my $5/month help support someone writing about writing for money instead of engaging in ACTUAL WRITING? Eff that!

And it’s not just me. I see great writing there, really excellent poetry, funny rants, solid flash stories… all with minimal recognition from other readers because the site pushes articles about bitcoin, Trump, or having a colonoscopy (the first three trending stories in my feed today). It’s super discouraging. 😢

Angry Bitmoji

I know we’ve talked a lot about the “hit & run” in Blogland, but the difference is that here I feel like I “know” some people and have valuable interactions with them… Sadje, Fandango, Angie, Melanie, Rory, Di, Barbara, Jim, Ashley, et al, plus the people I knew already from other venues, such as Keera, Roy, and AD. There are more in both groups, so please don’t be upset if I didn’t mention you ~ those are some of the people I saw in my latest notifs. Point is, interacting with these folks makes the “hit & run” bloggers tolerable. I understand that the majority of likes here are from bloggers who don’t know me, won’t ever care about my writing or buy one of my books, and only pay attention to me (for the nanosecond they do) in hopes I’ll follow them down a link-strewn path to some garbage video where I’ll be assaulted with ads. However! The small community of kind and fun folks who continually interact make WP a happy place to hang out.

Happy Bitmoji

I have spent so much time writing online for the past 20+ years. Usenet, blogs, Facebook, Twitter, yada, and now Medium. Not to mention that I’ve written actual books! And… nothing. Minimal book sales. Scant interaction on the other sites. Why do I keep wasting my time? I just don’t even know. I really don’t. Maybe I’m just not good enough or funny enough or poetic enough. I AM NOT FISHING FOR COMPLIMENTS. Please don’t. It’s actually worse for people to keep saying they like my writing (I know you mean well, so thank you) when the evidence is in that I can’t make it as a fiction or poetry writer, not even as a small side hustle. I do earn money via business writing, but I’m not talking about that now. I’m talking about the writing I love to do. Fiction and poetry. 💖

If I’m only writing for the love of writing, then I’ll do it here on my blog exclusively where I’ve enjoyed writing and interacting all along and where there’s no money to be made in the first place, so I don’t have to obsess over the lack of it flowing my way. It’s not like I’ve neglected my blog or anything, but I’ve spent almost all my other free time the last couple months on Medium, and it’s just depressing to me now. I can’t help but see the parallels to dating. It took me many years to acknowledge that I hate dating sites, dislike meeting new men who are going to judge me as a romantic prospect, and don’t even want a relationship at all under these crummy conditions. Since I’ve quit trying, that area of my life is calm and peaceful because I’ve filled it with more family time, friends, reading, movies, and painting. Why shouldn’t I do the same with the writing venues that are causing me distress? (I’m not dumping Twitter because it’s a good source for info, but I haven’t written poetry there lately.) That includes putting out more books for Amazon Kindle, where they’ll just sit on a virtual shelf growing mold like old banana bread no one wants.

Bitmoji no

~*~

©️2021 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

A Rose Is But A_Rose8491 [SOCS]

Pink rose

First thing, we come up with a cute name like beach-kitty or butterfly-candy. Nope, taken. Okay, how about miz_write? Clever, isn’t it? But no, they suggest miz_write473 or miz_write_taco or miz_write_aardvark. Wow, are there really 472 miz_writes? I try miz_wryte1 and they accept that. Now, to choose a photo and a font and a format and a tagline. I go with a library motif but soon decide it’s too boring. Then I do cupcakes, but they look childish. Besides, my main “thing” is not baking. Wouldn’t want to mislead anyone. Okay, sunsets obviously! I do my theme in sunset with complementary colors. OMG SO PRETTY! I’m very happy with this whole dealio even if it did take me three years to decide on everything. But wait! Now all my friends have moved to another site. Fine, I’ll go there too.


First thing, come up with a cute name…

~*~

©️2021 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

First Four of the Year

Friday four

Rory has a new set of Friday Four questions for us…

1. Do you ever simply stop and wonder ‘Where has time gone to?’ or is it something that never bothers you?

I definitely think about this and it bothers me frequently. I’m sad I haven’t been a big writing success and probably won’t be. I feel bad I failed at romantic relationships. I wish I’d spent more time with my mom; I wish I had more time now with my daughters and grandchildren. The next 20 years will pass in a flash, assuming I even get 20 more…

2. If you had a warning label, what would yours read?

“May spontaneously combust.”

Bitmoji rage fire

3. What fact amazes you every time you think of it?

That anything exists.

4. What kind of activities do you enjoy doing and what would you never do?

I like boring old lady activities: reading, writing, gentle walking, playing with cats and grandchildren, baking, painting, going to museums and libraries, drinking tea…

Things I would never do include all sports (playing or watching), exotic travel, fishing, hunting, camping, long hikes, and anything dangerous or adrenaline-rushy.

Bitmoji reading

~*~

©️2021 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

FPQ104: Practical Magic

FPQ

Fandango provocatively asks…

What do you think is the one subject (or thing) that should be taught in school that isn’t?

Life 101. I think all teenagers should have a Practical Life course requirement. Part 1 of the class would teach basic life skills such as cooking simple meals, safely using tools and appliances, sewing on a button, budgeting, learning how a car works, etc. The second part would teach teens how to behave in a job interview, how to avoid scams, and how to avoid dangerous confrontations online and offline, including red flags to watch out for (this isn’t limited to romantic situations).

Actually, we all might benefit from such a class! 😂

~*~

©️2021 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

FPQ103: Green-Eyed Monster

FPQ fandango

Fandango provocatively asks…

Is jealousy purely a negative and potentially destructive emotion, or does jealousy have any value as a motivator to drive people to improve themselves?

My view is that it depends upon which definition of “jealousy” we are using. If we’re talking about envy, then it could be a positive motivator. Forex, if I envy another writer’s success, that could inspire me to write more, market my work in new places, etc. If I envy someone else’s fitness, I might be motivated to exercise more, eat more veggies, etc. But if we are talking about the possessive fear of someone else taking what we have, this is generally a negative trait in relationships. I’ve been on both ends of this. I’ve dated men who were irrationally suspicious of every interaction I had with another man and interrogated me relentlessly about each comment. This led to me breaking up with them. No one can or should live with being constantly accused of infidelity because the other person is so ridiculously insecure.

Woman texting

But I’ve also been that insecure, jealous person at times ~ usually this happens when a man is unreliable or secretive. That spurs my imagination into overdrive, coming up with all sorts of scenarios why they’re acting like this. In one case, a man refused to let me see where he lived. I started to think maybe it was because he had another woman living with him. It wasn’t. He finally took me there and his place was super messy and gross. He knew I’d be turned off by this and he was right. But I spent months feeling jealous and annoyed over this one thing. Better to be honest upfront and let people know you have “relaxed” standards of housekeeping. There are plenty of women who would be fine with this. But the point is… my jealousy made me unattractive and nagging (Why can’t we go to your place? When will you take me there? etc.).

Shady man

Jealousy is bad. If you can’t trust someone, you shouldn’t be with them.

~*~

©️2020 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

First Share of 2021

SYW

Melanie continues her popular Monday prompt with these Q’s…

1. What’s a relationship deal breaker for you?

Smoking, racism/anti-Semitism, criticism (especially of my perfect children), liars, disloyalty/infidelity, rudeness, cat allergies, pet haters, travel maniacs, excessively loud men, big extroverts, BMW owners/drivers, Trump supporters, Michaels. I’m sure I left some out…

2. Do you believe in extra-terrestrials?

I think it’s more likely than not that there is life on other planets. Whether these ET’s are capable of space travel, who knows. I do not believe they are lizards infiltrating our govt though. 🙄

Bitmoji lizard

3. In the morning, do you hit the snooze button on your alarm (sometimes repeatedly) or do you leap out of bed, ready to face the day?

Neither. I wake up early naturally and am in a lot of back pain. I try to get comfy and read the news on my phone, check email, FB, etc. Eventually, it feels more uncomfy to lie there than to get up, so I get up…

4. If you came back in the next life as an animal, which animal would you choose to be? (and even if you don’t believe in that, let’s suspend belief for a moment just to have a little fun)

A butterfly! 🦋

GRATITUDE (Participation is always optional)

5. What do you plan to work on this year to make it better than last year (personal goals, physically or mentally, or all three)?

Kindness, especially to myself.

Kitty love

~*~

©️2021 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Cornered [SOCS]

Bitmoji corner

Standing in the corner used to be a punishment in the old days. Sometimes Mom would make you go stand in the corner and stare at the wall. I guess we were supposed to think about the bad thing we allegedly did and feel remorse. OH NO NOT THE CORNER! The blank white wall had no distractions to keep us from knowing we were bad. BAD! Not like the flawless wall. And that 90 degree angle was always so judgmental. Look how perfect I am, preened the corner. All day, every day, I do my job and keep these two walls in line so the ceiling can stay on and voila here’s a room, which connects to other rooms to make a house. A house where you’re safe from rain and snow and tigers and dinos and monsters from the deep. Do I quit my job when I get bored? Nope. I just stay right here, as I should. But what do you do when you’re bored? Fling your toys all over, smack your sister, feed noodles to the dog… Aren’t you ashamed of yourself? You should be. Go apologize to Mom and help her clean up. That’s a good kid. I’ll be here next time. And forever. Unless, you know, there’s a bomb or an earthquake or something.

~*~

©️2021 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Good Riddance 2020

Bitmoji dumpster

Welp, the last day of 2020 began fittingly. I went to bed early last night and then was wide awake at 2AM, so I doubt if I’ll be able to stay up until midnight tonight to kick 2020 all the way out the door unless I manage to take a nap. 😴

What a poopshow, amirite? Wish we could purge the whole thing from our memories, except for the part about my adorable grandson being born. I am not a fan of playing games over Zoom, though it’s better than nothing. Oh, somehow I managed to “lock” the keyboard of my new laptop, which sent me into a towering rage before dawn. I had to google on my phone how to unlock it, but that didn’t help, so I restarted. I don’t understand why turning off and on fixes stuff, but wev. It’s always the last thing I think of, even after all this time. I am typing this on my laptop now, so all is good until my next meltdown.😜

Bitmoji frustration

I’m no stranger to making resolutions, but like most people I don’t stick to mine, so why bother? The only thing special about tomorrow is the psychological aspect regarding the year number… nothing really changes. We are still in this plague, still have to wear masks, not socialize, not eat in restaurants, yada yada. I have flight credits, but they’ll likely expire before I’m all vaxxed up. 🙁

I made a new Facebook account in April after staying away for over 2 years, and while it’s nice to reconnect with peeps WHO DON’T READ MY BLOG, that’s the only thing good about it. So much repetitive bitching and boringness otherwise. I have never understood why people feel a need to link to news articles there or quote massively from them as if we can’t find CNN for our own damn selves. It’s not like the news isn’t in our faces 24/7 every time we log on to any device. It’s so irritating!

Bitmoji angry

I have been trying not to read the political stuff on FB, or participate in it, same as on Medium and here in blogland, though sometimes it’s impossible to resist. Occasionally I retweet political stuff I agree with, but I don’t comment, even when trolled. It’s still a big waste of time. I guess if I were going to have a goal for 2021, it would be to read even fewer political posts and articles than I do now. There is nothing to be gained from it and every time I spend an hour reading that crap, there goes a poem that might have been written or read. I think of it this way ~ poetry can bring beauty into this world (or at least attempt to do so), while political jabber only ever takes away from beauty. It’s all stinky trash.

So yeah… the ending of this awful year hasn’t made me feel especially galvanized to take bold action to shake up my life. There’s really nothing much I can do at this point, except keep on keeping on. And you know what? That is good enough. I’ve long since abandoned the notion of perfection, as if that’s even remotely possible to attain, and while my habits can be tweaked for the better, I’m pretty okay with my mediocrity. I look forward to doing exciting things again, such as having a veggie quesadilla inside a restaurant at a table with friends and playing a board game in person afterwards. Yeah baby. Take me back to 2019, when we didn’t know how good we had it. I suppose that’s a “privileged” thing to say, but at least I acknowledge this.

~*~

©️2020 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.