Category Archives: Noodling

FPQ89: Karma Chameleon

FPQ

Fandango provocatively asks…

Do you believe in karma (or a similar “reap what you sow” notion)? Why or why not?

I have a karma-ish belief. It’s more of the reap/sow Christian idea than the Eastern wheel/reincarnation structure. We can observe that actions have consequences, and some of the consequences take years to be fully realized. This isn’t a woo belief; it’s just logic.

Some people seem to lie in wait for karma to “strike” those they dislike, but it’s not always going to be observable. You’re not going to see every ruthless, selfish, greedy person crashing publicly to a terrible end. But many do suffer, which is why they’re so nasty. Pain, whether physical or emotional, can make people act badly toward others. We can infer their suffering by their behavior.

Perhaps more importantly, large-scale results occur after groups of people behave in a similar way. Again, they may take years to actualize, and even then are open to our interpretation. Look at this plague, forex, and how it’s affecting peeps/culture. We certainly haven’t been respecting the earth much lately, and I’m not the only one who “joked” last year that Mother Nature finds ways to rid herself of vast numbers of pesky humans from time to time….

However much we fantasize about karma as a vengeful goddess who smites our enemies, though, it mostly doesn’t work that way. But we can console ourselves that bad people who hurt others/animals often do get hurt at some point as a result of their own behavior. Karma however is more of a long game, group punishment idea (to me). We’re all going to suffer as the logical results take shape from the actions of a powerful few…

~*~

©️2020 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Home Share

SYW

Melanie is back to “normal” this week with her own four questions and nothing on HP.

1. Where do you feel most at home? Please be more specific than “at home, doh” please. It could be a room in your home, a person, a location… 😝 😁 😇

I enjoy being home and feel comfy sitting at my kitchen table with laptop, phone, cuppa tea, and Gatsby nearby.

2. Would you rather ride a bike, ride a horse, or drive a car? 🐎 🚗 🚲

Car, I guess, if I have to. Definitely not a horse because all that bumping would kill my back, and so would a bike these days, probably. Last time I rode a bike, I had massive neck and shoulder pain for a week after.

3. What song would you sing on “Karoke Night” (if you were forced to do so)? 🎤 🎶 🎻🎷🎺🎸🎵🎹

I have sung at karaoke and done a terrible job too. My voice is horrible plus idk when to even start singing! I think I attempted “Bang Bang” by Cher and a few others. Blocked it from my memory mostly…

4. University or life experience, which do you feel best prepares you for life? 🎓

First, I don’t think the “traditional” college experience of living away from home with a bunch of other clueless teenagers, being thrown into social and sexual situations you’re unprepared for, and drinking booze like a maniac is a good thing. Don’t even get me started on the travesty of “Greek life.” Second, I think trade schools have been way undervalued the past several decades while people rack up ridiculous debt to get a 4-year degree. The trades should be much more respected ~ we need plumbers more than marketers! That said, if someone takes a well-rounded slate of college classes and exposes their mind to literature, philosophy, art, psychology, etc., this all can be helpful throughout your life in order to better grasp history, logic, and human behavior. But ultimately, nothing better prepares you for life than living it and transforming your bad choices into learning experiences.

5. What are you grateful for?

This week I’m grateful for delicious pluots. Mmm, so good!

~*~

©️2020 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

My Favorite Mistake

Blogging insights tanya

Dr. Tanya continues her blogging about bloggers’ blogs blog bloggery by asking what we did wrong way back when. My wayback is probably older than most, since I began all this in 2003, with a blog on blogspot named “Ultrablog ~ Purple prose from Orange County… it’s ULTRAVIOLET!” That was my Usenet nickname and a group of us were fond of trying new fads. I took to blogging right away and even purchased a template to match my purple theme. Loads of my fellow Usenetters have disappeared from Blogland and simply hang out on Facebook now. But I like blogging best of all social media. 😍

Bitmoji happy balloons

My posts back then were about me and my opinions. I didn’t post much or any fiction/poetry; instead I blabbed on about my takes on the news or annoying incidents and just whatever. I did jabber way more about my kids, people I knew, and even work a little. I hate to say this, but because I was married to a lawyer, I felt safe in doing as I pleased. I had no fear of writing absolutely horrible stuff to other Usenetters while engaging in “combat prose” (it was mutual) and adding my bit of badness to the atmosphere of awfulness that has become exponentially worse as time goes on. My Usenet attitude/persona carried over into my blogging. 😎

Bitmoji zero chill

Most of my posts were short then, except a few frothy rants, and I generally flung some nonsense out 2-3 times per day. I received tons of comments and views because I had linked up with other bloggers who wanted to increase their stats, and we all visited each other’s posts constantly. I got totally caught up in the stats obsession and felt bummed out when my views sunk below 300/day or a post failed to get comments in the double digits. I participated in blog arguments and deliberately took on controversial views, all in order to get more “hits.” Finally, I ended up in a nasty flamewar (over pit bulls, lol), flamers began impersonating each other, my comment section got wrecked, and I quit. 😡

Bitmoji over it

My mistakes were obvious: worrying about stats, deliberately fanning flames, jumping into arguments at other blogs, and revealing too much about my life, including photos. I consoled myself that I did less of all this than the super-popular mommy bloggers, but even so. Ick! 😝🙁😢

I missed blogging though. I began a few new boring ones, a couple private ones, and this one… which ended up as my favorite. The others are all gone with some archived in my own files. When I started on WordPress, I was determined not to care about stats, not to post about politics, and not to get involved in arguments. If anyone starts crap here, I ban them. I did make some new mistakes though ~ when I was dating (🤮), I would post about some of the things that upset me or that I found funny. Then, when I met someone I actually liked (rare), I’d frantically delete all the dating posts before they could read them. Rinse, repeat.

bitmoji dizzy falling spinning

I haven’t deleted a post here in a long time. I doubt I would even if I met someone I liked romantically. They’d just have to deal with who I really am, and vice versa. 🤪 Not that I can imagine this happening imminently or even ever! 🤣 Anyway, I still enjoy blogging a lot, love the feedback on my writing, and have no plans to quit, despite the periodic glitches we have to deal with. Personally, I find the block editor a lot less annoying than that jerk who was copying our content a while ago. There will always be something…

Bitmoji amirite

~*~

©️2020 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Images from Bitmoji

Memory Container [socs]

Kaleidoscope colorful patterns

The mind makes only a mediocre container for memories. Some sneak out the door the day they arrive, crafty as a cat, while others drip down the drain in a slow leak. When you search for them all you find is debris. Some memories mutate every time you examine them and never appear the same way twice. My mind used to have a large storage area for facts, stacked neatly, easily accessible during tests, but I visited the warehouse recently and everything had been cleaned out. Helloooo, I called, but there was only an echo. Old memories turn up like random socks stuck in a sleeve. Hey! What are you doing in there? There are times I am absolutely certain of the accuracy of a memory, but it’s wrong. Then there are feeling memories… how I felt when something occurred, and how I perceived someone else’s feelings. These are hopelessly tangled up like a pile of crazy string. What if I only think I felt something because I used it in a poem, but it transformed in my imagination? Can I revert back to the original? I need to visit the Container Store!

~*~

©️2020 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Four for Pondering

Four aces

Rory has some great questions for us today as he continues his Friday Four prompt…

**What is more important to you – to be ‘Liked’ or to be Respected?’** What do you believe to be the difference between admiration and respect or do you find them to be the same?** Likability and friendship are two different things. Being likable to many is great, but being a great friend to a few (or one) is rare – what do you think to that statement – true or false, agree or disagree? How uniquely YOU are you in a world filled with variations of you anyway – what seperates YOU from the rest of the world and makes you Youniquely You??

1. Is it more important to me to be liked or respected? I know most people are going to say “respected” with some sort of comment about how they’re true to their values and would rather be respected for that than liked for smiling and going along. Well, I’m not most people. I would rather be liked as a helpful friend who is nice and funny and caring. I know for a fact there are people who see me this way but disrespect my values and political positions. I’m fine with that and I see no need to argue with them about issues none of us will budge on. This is why I don’t blather (much) about politics online. Not putting down those who do, but I’d rather keep my interactions positive.

Bitmoji happy balloons

2. Do I differentiate between admiration and respect? Yes, but it only works one way. What I mean is that if I respect someone, I can easily find something to admire about them, even something small. However, I can admire someone’s success without having respect for them as a person. Many celebs are in this category for me.

3. “Likability and friendship are two different things. Being likable to many is great, but being a great friend to a few (or one) is rare – what do you think to that statement – true or false, agree or disagree?” I obviously agree with this because I wrote it! Thanks, Rory, for including my thoughts. I know people who are liked by many ~ it seems important to them to collect as many “friends” as possible ~ but in my experience they are too busy spreading themselves around to have enough time and energy to focus on one true friendship. On the other hand, I know people who aren’t popular, but they will be there 100% for a few.

4. What makes me unique? Nothing! I don’t consider myself anything special, which is not meant to be a negative (see my remark about celebs). There’s nothing wrong with living a quiet, ordinary life and finding joy in small things.

Bitmoji purr cat

~*~

©️2020 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Images from Bitmoji

Wrong Way Share

SYW

Melanie has some new Q’s for us today, and again they are preceded by Potter Q’s from Roger.

Roger’s Magical, Mystical Questions

1. Have you ever driven the wrong way on a one-way street? How did this come about?

Right after I moved to California, I had a doctor’s appointment in Pasadena. I got a bit lost and didn’t realize I was on a one-way street. I started to make a left turn from the right lane and the guy in the left lane hit me. It was my fault, of course. He was nice and helped me figure out how to get to the doc’s.

2. As a kid, did you ever decide to run away? Did you have a plan? Take a pet? Sandwiches?

I was 17 and “ran away” for a day because my parents were driving me nuts. I had cash and a car, so I picked up a friend and we went to lunch. At first, she said she’d run away too, but she changed her mind. I drove 50 miles into Chicago and ate dinner alone. Then I turned around and went home.

3. You suddenly found you have a hidden talent for playing a musical instrument. What musical instrument do you hope that accompanies your talent? Any particular song?

It would be great to be able to play the piano well. Any song.

4. Do you accessorize with jewelry? There was an opal necklace (cursed) and Slytherin’s locket (also cursed) in the Potter story. Have you had any heirloom jewelry passed down through the generations? Is it more ‘keepsake’ or do you wear it on occasion? (Hopefully, yours was not cursed?)

Yes, I wear jewelry every day, usually silver. Mostly I wear a silver bracelet that’s a chain of hearts and some other stuff depending on my outfit. I do not have any heirlooms, only a few things that belonged to my parents.


Melanie’s Ordinary Muggle Questions:

1. What ingredients go into YOUR favorite salad?

Lately I’m not so much into leaves, so my favorite salad is cut tomatoes, carrots, cucumber, and of course avocado. A drizzle of balsamic dressing is good on that.

2. If you care to, share something that really irritates you.

Red light runners.

3. What are your favorite ‘lounging around the house’ items of clothing?  Now that a lot of people ‘lounge around the house’ waiting for the all clear in respect to Covid being shown the door, have those lounging items changed?

I like yoga pants and a big tee or sweatshirt. When it’s cooler, I’ll wear cozy socks. This hasn’t changed since the plague.

GRATITUDE (as always this is optional)

Please feel free to share something about Autumn (or Spring if you’re gearing up for that) that you especially enjoy! 

Grateful for my snuggly kitty.

 

Gatsby

~*~

©️2020 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Smoky Share

Share Your World

Happy Moonday! Hope your air isn’t as horrible as California’s. Melanie continues with a double dose of Q’s for this week…

Roger’s Magical, Mystical Questions:

1. You have just been gifted a magic wand that specializes in completing household chores. You can request the completion of only two household chores. Which chores would you assign your wand to complete?

Wax the car! Paint the house! But seriously, since California is my home, I think this wand should magically clean our air from smoke and our water from pollution.

2. At the local Wizards-R-Us store there was a sale on handshake shockers, instant darkness pellets, and levitation pills. Which of these ‘party thrillers’ are you more likely to purchase?

Hello darkness, my old friend…

3. In the alley behind Wizards-R-Us, there was a tradesman selling a Love Potion. The sales pitch was too much for you and you yielded and purchased one vial. What do you do with it?

Pour it on a lottery ticket.

bitmoji bonus

4. You are the Great Clearinghouse Winner of a new ‘good luck’ potion – Felix Felicis. It has to be used within the next thirty days or its potency becomes diminished. Do you use it? Do you give it to a friend in need?

Give it to a daughter.

Melanie’s Mundane Muggle Questions:

5. If everyone spoke their mind, would this world be a better or worse place? Why?

Worse. Just look at Twitter and FB! Yuck. People need to relearn what polite topics of conversation are. Hint: not religion and politics. The world doesn’t need to see all your ugly and hateful feelings… repress those suckers.

6. Can achieving nothing make a person happy?

By “a person,” I take it to mean me, and I say no. People who answer yes aren’t homeless and starving.

7. How do you know if you love someone enough to marry them?

You don’t, nor is there any guarantee they’ll love you till they (or you) die. It’s always a gamble.

GRATITUDE SECTION (as always this is optional)

Please feel free to write about or share an image of something you’re grateful for!

~*~

©️2020 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Images credited to Melanie and Bitmoji

FPQ86: Dream A Little Dream

Fandango’s provocative question

Fandango provocatively asks…

What has been the strangest, weirdest dream that you can remember? What do you think triggered that dream?

When I was very young, I dreamt about getting attacked by a wolf, which I think was triggered by having a sore throat in the night. I mentioned this dream in a SYW post recently:

I was little, around 10 or under, and dreamt I got lost at the zoo. I ended up behind the exhibits and there was a wolf loose. He jumped on me and ripped my throat open. In the dream, I died, though I understand that isn’t supposed to happen in dreams. I woke up with strep throat.

This 2011 baby dream could symbolize creativity. Maybe I was writing a lot then, or thinking about new ideas for novels.

Fantasy reading romance novel book

Here’s a scaryweird dream I had in 2011 about a pink and yellow lizard. This one could have been triggered by alcohol, or dating, neither of which agree with me.

When I was married, I had lots of dreams about drowning. Here’s one I had a few years later in 2013. Two others that stand out in my memory are as follows. Once when I was in a strange huge house with my whole family (including the ex’s), plus people from school, no one would listen to me that there was water coming up to the windows. Finally, we all had to go onto the roof. Another time I was in a carnival type ride with both my daughters and we ended up on the Coast Highway where everything was flooded. Supposedly these drowning dreams arise from feeling overwhelmed or suffocated by something. Or someone…

I had this dream about my mom in 2013. I think about Mom a lot and miss her so much. I’ve had plenty of other dreams with her in them, but they weren’t weird enough to remember. 💔

If love could have saved you

In 2016, I had a few dreams about driving (one with scary dogs). I’ve had many more dreams about driving, often where I’m not in the seat the right way and can’t reach the brake pedal. Driving scares me, so it makes sense I dream about it. One benefit of this bizarre year is that I’m in the car a lot less.

Lately, I don’t dream much (or my memory is immediately wiped). Maybe it’s because I don’t usually sleep that soundly, idk. I used to be such a great sleeper! Oh well… aging, whaddayagonna do?

It was fun to do the “research” for this post. Thanks, Fandango! 🙂 Sorry I couldn’t pick just one.

Bitmoji shrug

~*~

©️2020 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Images from Fandango, Bitmoji, etc.

Bloggerz 3

Bitmoji me time reading with kitty cat

I missed a few of Rory’s Bloggerz posts, since the last one I did was in June. They do take some time, so possibly I passed them up on purpose. Today I have time… it’s 102 degrees and I feel too yucky to do anything creative.

Here are this month’s 12 questions

1. What really lights you up?

My granddaughter. She’s so adorable and fun to be around. I love the little vids her mom sends.

2. When do you think we become old?

Well, for me age IS a number, so I’m not going to spout some cliche. Today my life expectancy is 85.9, giving me 26.5 more years. This means I’ve used up about 69% of my life. That’s over two-thirds, so in my opinion I’m past “middle age” and into Oldville. Plus, I’m a grandma! 💖💖

3. What’s in your fridge right now?

Milk, rye bread, eggs, pickles, carrots, etc.

4. Never mind three wishes give me one good fantasy which would be … ?

A massive blue tsunami at the polls this November.

Blue tsunami eagle

5. How do you think your readers see you as the writer of your blog as a person away from your blog?

Idk. It depends if they know me IRL and/or other places online, plus everyone has their own spin on things. 🙃

6. How do you wish to be seen and interpreted as a person away from your blog by the readers of your blog?

Daenerys and dragons

7. Do our fears start with our DNA?

Some fears are hardwired, such as the fear of snakes, heights, water, and other things that can kill you. Not everyone has those, of course, and some have them to a greater degree. Other fears are triggered by events that trip a switch. 😱

8. What is the truest quality of life in your opinion?

The limitless love I have for my children.

9. What do you think the secret is to you letting yourself go?

This implies that “letting yourself go” is a good thing, and I mostly disagree with that premise. I’m more a fan of work and self-discipline. I realize the question doesn’t mean turning into a fat frump but instead relates to feeling free and uninhibited by rules and expectations. My answer stands regardless.

10. What stops you from being the truer version of you or are you already the truer version of you?

I’ve always been about the same as far as my emotional inner life and how I express myself. Chronic pain has stopped me from doing all that I might have otherwise. I do self-censor to various degrees in different environments, but I think everyone should.

11. What are 7 things you have learned about blogging since you started your blog that would be beneficial to other bloggers right now?

Stop obsessing over stats, likes, etc. Asking for money (the “tip jar”) is obnoxious. The teaser link is annoying and people won’t click to read more. Don’t post links to news articles as the entirety of your post. Don’t load your posts with a gazillion images. Don’t post personal undisguised info about other people without their permission or compromise your children’s privacy. Shorter is better; learn to be succinct.

12. Should we care what other people think about us?

It depends who they are. I certainly care a lot what my daughters think about me. I care what my coworkers think. To a lesser extent, I care what my friends think. I don’t care what anons on the internet think, not that I try to antagonize anyone (anymore).

Bitmoji shrug

~*~

©️2020 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Images credited to Bitmoji and wherever…

FPQ85: Paths Not Taken Yada Yada

pointless meanderings

I thought I’d turn Fandango’s Provocative Question today into a pointless meander. He asks if I’ve ever had to make what turned out to be a life-changing decision and, if so, do I wish I could go back in time and change it, blah blah, what and why. There have been a few…

Generally, I begin with my foolish decision not to go to Northwestern U. I had no idea about “prestigious” colleges back then apart from the obvious Harvard, Yale, etc. I knew it was good I’d gotten accepted, but the gravitas of the decision was foreign to me. I behaved impulsively as a teen and things that went wrong were easily fixed. Everything felt inconsequential at the time. My parents didn’t seem to care, and after an argument with my mom, she decided she didn’t want to pay for NU, so I ended up at the University of Illinois in Champaign. It was a horrible experience, I dropped out, moved back home, and ended up in a series of dead-end, low-paying jobs.

Next, I moved from Chicago to Southern California with my parents at age 22. I’m not sure this was a great decision, though it would have been hard to stay in the city alone given my crappy jobs. But from the minute I stumbled off the plane to right now, I’ve had one giant migraine that never seems to disappear for good. I know I’d probably suffer from them wherever I lived, but it soured the whole experience for me. I remember being bombarded with the dazzling sunshine when we landed and feeling like I was going to pass out from the brightness and the pain.

Finally, I returned to college to finish my degree. But again, doh, I eschewed UCLA for Cal State because the freaking parking was easier. It seemed like an okay decision at the time, but it was yet another folly. Not that I had a bad experience at Northridge ~ I actually loved it all and appreciated my classes and the professors there. But until I had my own children I did not realize the importance of the name of a school. Whatever, at least I finished and that led me to the job I have now, which is good. But I got a late start at a career and retirement savings…

All the while this school/moving stuff was going on, I was also dating. Ugh, what a nightmare. I can’t blame online dating and culture such as it is now for my relationship issues, since I’ve had them all along. I am attracted to the wrong men, and that’s just the common denominator of the whole mess. I regret spending/wasting time with a lot of these guys, but I can’t regret my second marriage because my two wonderful daughters are my prize for sticking with it. I should have ended it sooner however. I definitely regret all the years I thought the marriage could be fixed and floated in limbo, taking no action to help myself move on.

I like to imagine that if I’d been single in my 40s I would have had a great romance and met my life partner, though that’s probably false. I would have simply made stupid dating decisions all that time too. Ugh, thinking about all this is an emotional drain… plus it’s all fantasy. I did what I did and here I am. The only thing to do is to slog on…

AND VOTE BLUE!!!

~*~

©️2020 Paula Light and Light Motifs II. No unauthorized use permitted. Please check out Paula’s books for sale on Amazon.

Image altered from the original at Pixabay.