“I leave the key in the lock because I am an optimist,” Oliver chirped. “I don’t believe anything bad will happen to us. And if someone is hungry enough to visit the home of a stranger, they are welcome to make themselves a sandwich in our kitchen. Even a bear! It’s too sad to think of those poor mama bears wandering around with little cubs whining for cookies. I leave some out, just in case!”
“I leave the key in the lock because I’m a pessimist,” Penelope grumbled. “Public bathrooms are full of germs and psychos, so when we get home from an errand I have to pee so badly I can’t fumble with keys or else I’ll have an accident. Also, I worry that if our druggie neighbor comes over looking for more valuables to steal, she’ll break the window if we fail to leave the key in the door. Plus, Oliver is so demented he leaves cookies out for bears. I want the paramedics to be able to reach us quickly after we’re mauled.”
“So is that the key to your fifty years of wedded bliss?” Ivy the interviewer asked. “You both are tolerant of each other’s quirks and always reach a compromise?”
“Hell no,” Oliver objected.
“It’s the hot sex,” Penelope preened.
Image from Pixabay. Written for Sadje’s WDYS.
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