Just Breathe [socs]

Instructions for optimal health, according to the experts. πŸ˜€

1. “Throw out this vegetable now!” Which one? You’ll have to watch a 47-hour video to discover the answer.

2. Eat like a caveman: meat, berries, nuts, roots, etc. πŸ‡

3. Remember that cavemen died at age 27, max, so don’t eat like a caveman. πŸ’€

4. Eat only one meal a day, so your liver has time to detox between feedings.

5. No, what you need to do is graze all day long like a cow, mooooooo. πŸ„

6. Speaking of, give up dairy, unless you’re a baby cow. 🍼

7. No, dairy is fine, as long as it’s nonfat.

8. Wrong! Fat is fine; sugar is the new evil.

9. Sugar and carbs, honey. You should be getting all your nutrients from the air. 🌈

10. Btw, you’re breathing all wrong. Send us money and we’ll show you why… πŸ’°

31 responses to “Just Breathe [socs]

  1. good one…thanks for share

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I like number one. I have seen that ad so many times in blogosphere email.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. πŸ€£πŸ™‹β€β™€οΈπŸ

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Doctors are furious about this new practice involving brussel sprouts that totally eliminates the need for medical care. What they don’t want you to know…

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Oh my you’ve covered it all. I am in analysis paralysis over how to truly be healthy. Wonderful take on the prompt!!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Yes, yes, but what about all the magic supplements that will shed pounds, grow hair and improve your sex life? πŸ˜‚
    Love this!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I hate those ads that you click on and you end up sitting there watching as they beat around the bush for half an hour before they get to the inevitable sales pitch. If you navigate away before it’s over, you get a popup that makes you feel guilty. I’ve fallen for that more than once.

    Liked by 2 people

  8. Great post. Entertaining and realistic. Thanks for the laughs. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  9. It’s a myth that our ancestors didn’t live as long as we do now. Average life span is an average. The higher the infant mortality rate, the lower the average. But there are still grandparents.

    I do love your take on those stupid videos promising to tell you about This One Thing. πŸ˜†

    Liked by 1 person

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