Precious and Few [SOCS]

I have a small and compact life, the opposite of “living large” as I believe the term is used. The pieces of my puzzle are few, but they are very precious to me. (Not saying that people who have more pieces to their life puzzles consider any of those pieces any less precious.)

I’ve been thinking about this recently in the context of dating, and why that didn’t work out for me. I’ve said that lots of men are too picky, which is true, at least (imo) about superficial requirements, like needing a ski buddy. Dude, you’re 60… how often do you actually ski? Anyway, besides the fact that I met a ridic number of mentally ill men (but some were not), the fact is that I’m not so willing to compromise on my puzzle pieces either. They’re much too precious to me. Forex, I would never give up my kitty, nor would I agree to shut him out of the bedroom. He’s annoying, but he’s family.

Just this last week I visited my daughter for a week ~ I had a bunch of unused vacay days I was happy to spend on family. I wouldn’t want to “waste” those on a guy. I deliberately keep days unused so I can have them for my (adult) kids, if I want. This makes me happy. It also makes me happy to randomly take a day off for myself and do absolutely nothing without having to explain that to anyone. Nope, don’t wanna see anyone. Doing nothing! Yayyy!

I know it sounds like I’m only temporarily happy because I haven’t yet met Mr. Right, and that could be true, but I am 57, so I’ll take the transitory joy for as long as it’s available. It’s also great to have my own friends and not have to “share” them with a boyfriend. You know what I mean. He’d clomp along with me to see my friends, and I wouldn’t necessarily even want him there but would have to pretend to, and then I’d have to reciprocate by seeing his friends. Ughhh.

I know I’m thinking about this all wrong. I used to fantasize about how much fun it would be to meet someone… but now it just seems like it would take away from all my precious loves. Not that it matters cuz I don’t meet new men these days, but this is stream of consciousness Saturday. 😀

10 responses to “Precious and Few [SOCS]

  1. I don’t think you’re thinking about this wrong at all. I admire that you honor your values and don’t settle. It’s okay to imagine someone who will fit in nicely with the life you love. That’s still a possibility.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I knew it! There are more women out there who do not feel “incomplete” just because they do not have a partner fixed to the hip. Nothing wrong with being single and maybe having a little fun by yourself. Enjoy it while you can. PS I’m 67 and married, but I’m just saying.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. “Precious and Few”! Great song!

    You know what? You’re not thinking about this wrong. In fact, I think you have the right approach. You shouldn’t have to feel that you’re dragging anyone along while you meet with your friends and have a good time with them. Nor should you have to drop everything for him. Have your time with your family and friends and do the things you love to do. If you find someone who makes doing those things more enjoyable, wonderful, but if you don’t, fine too. The older I get, the more I realize that you have to take care of you first.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. i also agree with the comments here already. The thought process you are undertaking isn’t wrong – in fact quite the opposite. The dating game isn’t like what it used to be say as little as 20 years ago, now it’s a huge cattle market of whim, trend and expectation.

    I was on a dating site nearly 6 years ago, l was constantly banging my head against the keyboard because of the so called expectations of others, who were not being honest. In fact, in one of your previous posts l read this morning about the Billy Joel song The stranger, many a time that is exactly the situation in this game. Finding the right person was never easy, but Jimmidy cricket it’s a darn sight harder now 🙂

    Good post.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Love, love, LOVE this perspective!!!!

    Liked by 1 person

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