Remembrance

Nothing to do with 9/11.

From time to time I get in the mood to Facebook/Google people I’ve known to see what’s going on with them, if anything. Last night I found a bunch of peeps from my HS class with open FB walls. Didn’t realize so many keep their shields down; then again, their chitchattery is relatively bland. (I’m sure mine is, too, but I try to keep it locked due to super-paranoia.)

Anyway, one thing led to another, as it does, and when I looked for an old boss from the 1980s, a larger than life type of guy I’ve loosely based a few characters on here and there … I found his obit.

This was rather shocking, though I don’t know why. People do die, so why not him? Well, he wasn’t that old at the time of death (early 60s) and had been a health food nut. But hey long time ago one of my doctors got hit and killed by a car while jogging in the early morning darkness. So, anyway. Don’t know the cause of death of ex-boss, nor am I in contact with anyone whom I could ask.

I’m not sad here, don’t get me wrong. The guy was a complete jerk, treated me like crap, and I ended up walking off the job one day after two years sans notice. But he wasn’t the kind of person you’d ever forget is all. To this day I can quote him verbatim. Other old bosses? Not so much … they all blend into the mist.

Weird. Maybe there really is TMI out there.

Or I could quit snooping when I’m supposed to be writing…

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7 responses to “Remembrance

  1. I’ve noticed I never forget the total a*hole bosses I’ve had over the years. It seems like there is something wrong when I hold negative memories of such unpleasant people. I hope no one remembers me because of what a jerk I was, but there probably are a few people out there.

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  2. I am of the opinion that people who behave out of the ordinary are memorable. That unfortunately tends to mark the very negative more often than the positive because I guess we all expect positive behavior (thus it would be ordinary), or at least civil behavior.

    I have strong memories of several bosses, though — one of them an inadvertent asshole, another a bitch-boss from hell (who somehow thought her “strong” techniques were good), and the third who was a mentor and excellent example of what a boss ought to be.

    I.A. was just clueless and really shouldn’t have been a boss. He was an engineer who had been peter principled. Didn’t know how to handle female engineers and, instead of just basically acting like I was an engineer instead of a woman, tried to be male and protective and cutesy all at once. Ended up stepping on his dick.

    BBfH thought her peculiar brand of misanthropistic “common sense” made for solid managing techniques. People were actually afraid of coming under her scrutiny and vast untold hours of effort were spent preparing for her weekly status review meetings. We had dry runs of meetings to ensure we had the right information and the right way to present it. So two three-hour meetings instead of, say, one 2 hour meeting. She’d stalk around and pop into people’s cubes while they were working to “chat” and throw everyone off balance. Then she’d do a manic flip and suddenly have a pizza party and make long speeches about feeling like she was our mother and how we were all family, blah blah.

    Mentor was … regular guy, good hearted, and saw the strengths and weaknesses in his team members and in the work to be done. Fostered the strengths, honestly assessed the weaknesses and offered assistance in working through them. He seemed so much older than me when I started, but as I encountered him through the years, his 10 years advance on me shrank in perspective. When I left my previous company he was just a peer, around my age, and we were good friends.

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  3. Well… I guess now you can take the pins out of that voodoo doll.

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  4. I think the number one stressor in the work place is loss or lack of control. Bad bosses increase that, good bosses at least try to keep it to a minimum.

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  5. I’ve had some good and some poor bosses. Maybe I’ll check the best one out to see if she’s on FB.

    Pew says 22% of social networkers look up and contact h.s. friends–that’s higher than all the other categories. My biggest category on FB is relatives (big family) and church members (3 campuses, 9 services, 4 worship styles).

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  6. Roy, in meatspace (as opposed to the internets) people don’t remember me at all. I don’t mean to sound whiny, it’s just a fact and has always been. Even my Scrabble group that I’ve been to 3x now … people are still having trouble with my name. It’s not that I’m so shy or anything. Well, whatever.

    Gekko, maybe that’s it. I don’t behave negatively in public, ever. (Here is another story. :)) And I remember loud, annoying, negative people, which is probably what everyone does. Not to mention scary people. Ex-boss was SCARY. He bragged about getting into fistfights. Maybe someone killed him.

    Teacake, good idea! Can recycle those…

    Norma, I generally don’t contact peeps, just snoop around. Sometimes get writing ideas that way, but mostly … pure snoopage. 🙂

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  7. Bosses make good characters. That one croaked as we will do some day and the drama will disappear like last year’s christmas tinsel. Great to be a snoop though. 😉

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