IDOJ, Part 2

As mentioned, I bought all the I Dream of Jeannie episodes and have been watching them in order. I had fond misty memories of this show… beautiful, goofy girl falls for handsome, serious astronaut… wacky things happen for years until he falls in love with her too and they get married… more wackiness occurs thereafter.

It is like that. But there’s more. I’m at the end of S2 now, fyi. I can’t go any faster because annoying.

First, there’s Jeannie’s obsession with marrying Tony. I mean, she’s fucking magic ~ she could do anything, be anything, have anything, anytime. But the only thing she cares about is getting that ring on her finger. I realize the show was written in the 1960s, but the obsession is tedious. Why does she need marriage so badly? Ostensibly because she loves Tony, but so what? Maybe she’s just horny 24/7 and they couldn’t write that in the 1960s, so this was the next best thing. Ugh.

Second, it’s now making me uncomfortable to watch Jeannie constantly throwing herself at Tony physically, while he rejects her outright or stands like a statue. I’m starting to wonder about their chemistry after all. He’s so irritating and paranoid. I understand there can’t be any implication that T&J have premarital sex, but Tony’s non-reaction to Jeannie’s affection grates on my nerves. And all the while there’s good old Roger totally wanting her.

Third, (again) the show isn’t that funny. It relies a lot on physical humor ~ Tony falling on his ass when Jeannie does startling blinky thingie, forex ~ and a lot less on wordplay. I’m not sure why I ever thought this show was witty. (The ep with Paul Lynde as an IRS agent is the funniest so far.) :(

Fourth, there are so many bloopers it’s ridiculous. In one ep Jeannie gets hired as General Peterson’s secretary and Tony freaks out because Dr. Bellows has seen Jeannie at his house (and Bellows predictably begins an investigation that blows up in his face), but in later eps Tony doesn’t care at all how many times someone has seen Jeannie previously. Roger is always going on dates and cuddling up with beautiful women, but then outta the blue it’s a thing that he never has anyone. In one ep, Haji tells Jeannie she isn’t allowed to marry Tony unless she reveals that their kids might be genies. This is stupid on two counts: one, only powerful genies can turn people into genies (FACT!); and two, when T&J finally marry in a later ep, this is totally forgotten. There are tons of other inconsistencies…

Onward!

T&J

A Thousand Kisses Deep

You live your life as if it’s real…

Sorry I haven’t been around here much. Hope all my peeps are doing well.

No Spoon For You

Ran across this interesting perspective today on how it is to live with chronic pain. The gist is to imagine you have a handful of spoons to “spend” and from the moment you wake up in the morning everything you do requires giving up a spoon. You quickly realize you’ll run out before the day is half over unless you pace yourself.

Now, my migraine/dizziness situation isn’t that bad  ~ forex, taking a shower actually makes me feel better, not energy-depleted. There are things I can do to increase the number of spoons I have to spend during the day. But even so, I have to be careful, and the older I get the more I have to think about it.

I can’t stay up super-late very often without it affecting my health. My body refuses to sleep in to make up for the lost ZZZZZs, and naps are also difficult, so I simply get sleep-deprived and end up with an endless migraine, or worse.

I can’t do a whole bunch of socializing that requires driving here and there, changing plans, being in noisy and/or brightly lit places, eating at odd times, eating odd foods, etc. That’s stressful to me. I have to carefully plan social events, leaving a bunch of “white space” between them to be alone at home.

I must avoid unnecessary emotional drama because I easily fall into an anxiety spiral. I can’t talk on the phone too long without getting a headache. I have to be careful to avoid migraine-triggering odors and lighting situations. I can’t type all weekend because my hands will be achy when I need to go to work Monday. Etc. But I still feel lucky I can be pretty much OK if I pay attention and avoid things that will hurt me. Some chronic pain sufferers don’t have that luxury.

For me, it seems I get a weekly quota of spoons to spend, rather than daily. And it works out to do a little socializing on the weekend knowing I’ll have quiet weekday nights for the most part.

It was fun to discover that someone has made a big effort to educate peeps on how it is to live with chronic pain. Me, I just figure I’ll do what I need to do and people will either be bright enough to understand or … I don’t need them in my life.

Spoons

The Inescapable Sadness of Spring

I’ve always been a fall girl. Because Halloween.  And pumpkins. And the crisp, apple-fresh start of a new school year. Yes, I’m one of those weirdos who liked school best of all environments. It’s where I shone brightest.

Spring brings sadness. After the end-of-winter conflicting emotions surrounding Valentine’s Day and my ex-anniversary, comes my father’s death day, his birthday, my mother’s death day (today), my birthday, Mother’s Day, and finally my mother’s birthday June 3rd.  At least there’s a happy day following on June 8th ~ Gatsby’s birthday.

I didn’t used to think of my birthday as a sad event, but I do now. A bunch of relationship issues happened then, plus I’m old. Yeah, yeah, but I feel old. I think I must have arthritis now.

However, there is this…

20150411_172651

Shocking Confession

Brace yourselves.

Spoiler space.

Ready?

Are you sitting down?

OK, then…

I hate traveling.

There, I said it. Whew! I feel like a big freak (not that I dgaf) because everyone says they love travel. It’s right up there with loving honesty and puppies and fresh air and clean water. Who doesn’t want to journey to interesting places, see cool things, eat mysterious foods, and take loads of photos?

Well, me. I like being home, where I’m safe and comfy. Or where I at least can maintain an illusion of safety. And routines. And my cat. I like going to bed at the same time every night. I dislike time zone changes. I don’t want weird foods. I dislike air travel intensely, though I can tolerate the hour-long flight to Oakland because daughters. I possibly might travel with one or both of them in the future because… daughters. But I don’t crave traveling as an end in itself.

I’m old and I’m boring; however, I never liked travel. It was never “on the list.”

Part of this could be my physical condition ~ migraines, neck pain, major issues with odors, noise, light, random attacks of teh dizzies. I need to be able to control my environment to function well. Or at all.

I vicariously enjoy otter people’s travels. I like hearing about the plans, seeing the pictures, etc. It’s a fun topic of conversation. But I will enjoy it from the comfort of my sofa, thank you.

Finances come into play ~ traveling nicely is hugely expensive. Even if I had the urge to go somewhere exciting, the cost would make me reconsider. But say I won the lottery ~ would I want to travel then? Eh. Probably not. I still would want to keep to my routines (though I’d add new ones, like a daily professional massage) and be with my kittycat every day. I might have moar kittycats… and a big kittycat house…

Yeah, I fantasize about buying an adorable cottage surrounded with flowers and filling it with cats, cupcakes, games, and movies. Not flitting around the world.

It shouldn’t be a big deal I don’t want to travel, but on dating sites it is. Every man has traveled extensively, it seems, and has a wishlist of far-flung places to visit. They have the elephant riding photos to prove it (some 10 years old, but hey, isn’t it the place not the face that counts?) ~ and a typical initial question is where have I been/want to go. No man says he likes to stay home, even though you know that is what they all do most of the time.

But why is it bad to say so? I like to be home. I don’t need to go anywhere else.

HSH

Quickie Movie Reviews

These are old, so don’t get excited.

1. Hitch. Wow, what a fun movie! My friend brought it over for us to watch after Passover seder. It’s a typical rom-com, but almost all from the hero’s POV, which was different. Lotsa chemistry between the protags and a great supporting cast too.

2. Finding Neverland. Interesting story of how J.M. Barrie was inspired to write Peter Pan. I really enjoy Johnny Depp, in whatever role. Highly recommend.

3. Pillow Talk. One of my all-time faves and it holds up decades after my first viewing. Love the witty dialog and the chemistry between Rock Hudson and Doris Day. Tony Randall is adorb and Dr. Bellows plays a phone company employee, tee hee.

4. Identity. Weird, scary, violent, exciting, suspenseful, interesting plot twists, and John Cusack. Love this movie ~ and I bought it so I can watch again because I’m still not exactly sure wtf happened there.

5. Stuck in Love. OK, this movie both intrigued me and annoyed me. I found the protag Dad oddly interesting in his obsession with his ex-wife. Annoying how he didn’t appear to be working anymore but had a big beautiful house on the beach regardless. Because having one famous book means you’re set for life, right. I loved his daughter and thought her romance was very well-done. Loved her dude. But it was super-annoying that she wrote a book while in college, tossed it, wrote another one and boom got published at a top house. Ridiculous. Younger brother is still in high school and wants to be a writer, too, natch. Sis sends his story to Stephen King who calls him personally to say he liked it, because THAT CAN HAPPEN. I found the girl’s estrangement from her mother and her boyfriend’s loss of his mom super-moving and believable. A mix of yay and rawr throughout.

More to come. :)

Passover Pome

O Elijah
Your chair is bare
No call, no text
I wash hands next
Time for a prayer

O Elijah
The herbs are bitter
But the wine is sweet
I try not to look
At your empty seat

O my
I have lost count
Of cups of wine
Is this the third
From Elijah, no word

O matzo
Why are you so dry
Can I dunk you in wine
Much better, no butter
Oops need new glass

Alas Elijah
Seems I have drunk your wine
Blackberry mmm so fine
Don’t be sad my friend
Next year, in Jerusalem!

OMG migraine
Is your fault Elijah
Turn off the light
Is this a new plague
Mine go up to eleven

The Art Forger

I loved The Art Forger by Barbara A. Shapiro. Surprised the hell out of me, it did.

1. It’s in first person, present tense. Eww. But it works well.

2. There are constant flips to a backstory from 3 years ago. Yucky. But it works to build suspense and character.

3. There’s a series of old letters from 100 years ago. OMG noooo! But they are oddly… interesting.

4. A whole bunch of technical stuffs is plastered in about painting technique. Weirdly fascinating. Plus how can I not adore the word “craquelure?”

5. The heroine’s attraction to a certain dude annoys me, but I’m cheering for her anyway. Go figure.

None of the characters are very likeable, in that they haz glaring ethical flaws, but yet I can totally sympathize with the heroine regardless. Eh, probably because of. :)

Thing is, I never would have found this book, much less bought and enjoyed it, if it wasn’t for the Kindle Unlimited program. Sure, my first impulse is to grab up some romance novels for the next bout of reading, but sometimes I get /whispers/ a little bored of them. So, I branch out and look at the mysteries and other fiction. Snatched up a rando book of poetry the otter day. Can haz anything I want in the pile for my $10 per month. No like? Throw it back after a few pages. Awesomeness.

Today I began some crazy thing (first person again!) about a crazy spoiled rich girl whose daddy cuts her off when she gets pregnant. It sounds awful, except it’s written in Britspeak, which makes me all squee!

Happy April!

Peeps

Sealioning

Barking

I learned a new term this week ~ sealioning. Originally I came across it via a Facebook friend who linked to this article by Sarah Seltzer on trolling behaviors that go beyond “mansplaining.” Seltzer described another obnoxious behavior, which consists of barking questions at a person and called it “manterrogating.” She provided a link to a poast by blogger Tegiminis specifically about that one technique. Tegimins aptly named this sealioning:

The purpose of sealioning never to actually learn or become more informed. The purpose is to interrogate. Much like actual interrogators, sealioners bombard the target with question after question, digging and digging until the target either says something stupid or is so pissed off that they react in the extreme.

Now, these blogpeeps were talking about online trolling, but I dgaf about that. I pan for these nuggets of gold to help me recognize crappy dating behaviors and kick the guy to the curb faster than I used to.

I am not going to call myself a victim (yuck), but I have been subjected to some sealioning and while it was never acceptable, now I understand that it’s actually a deliberate manipulative technique, rather than just a facet of personality. These guys engage in a pattern of aggressive questioning in the name of “honesty” and imply that you’re dishonest if at any point you want to exit the interrogation. But they don’t actually care about your answers; the point is to keep you continally anxious and off-balance.  You’re thinking, OK, if I just answer this one last thing, he’ll be satisfied and stop. Nope.

And peeps say Facebook is a waste of time. Hah!

My Favorite Mistakes

This may seem like a lazy poast, but really I ventured out into the wilderness of Google images to hunt down profound quotes to share with you. Remember when I burbled on about (no) Second Chances? That’s relevant here because giving a second chance is (in general, for me) making a mistake… and we won’t even talk about third, fourth, fifth chances. I am me, and whatever didn’t work for me at x-time isn’t going to work for me now. I don’t change and otter people don’t change either. EOFS.

some-mistakes-are-too-much-fun-to-only-make-once-mistake-quote

mistakes1

17isajy55p0lyjpg

mistakes3

191403052883391156lVl5uq7Hc

These don’t only have to apply to romantic relationships, but for me they pretty much do. I don’t make that many mistakes in otter areas of my life. Seems like I should be able to take my successful ways of dealing with everything else and put them to use in the dating arena, but so far… not so much. However, I am getting better at exiting faster, so that’s good.

A friend just complimented me on that yesterday, which was nice to hear. :)