In Praise of Inconsistency

We don’t have to be consistent!

This is important. Granted, I’ve had some wine, but wait. Just listen.

We don’t have to be consistent. It took me a looooong time to really grok this, but it is very much OK to use arbitrary standards and feelings to choose friends and dates/lovers, and even more so to change your mind after doing something once. Saying OK to a thing, because you think it might be fun, but then it’s not, doesn’t obligate you to keep on doing it forever.


I know, right?

Remember Baggage Reclaim? Natalie sez…

Does the fact that somebody has been able to cross our boundaries give them the right to continue doing so? No one is entitled to disrespect us just because they have previously benefited from what may be our lack of self-esteem or our lack of awareness or even foresight about what certain behaviours or decisions mean. That entitlement does not exist regardless of how we personally manage our boundaries.  — Baggage Reclaim

I love this so much.


So, I got home after all this rain and working late on a Friday night only to find… no poasts from my peeps.

What is up with that? Is it the holidays? Do y’all suddenly have LIVES?


I was forced to glance through the random news in my feed reader. I saw that a Huntington Beach woman had been scammed out of $64K from some online dating asshole. Yeah, she was an idiot, but still… why do people have to be such DICKHEADS? Then I got to thinking… hey I am still doing online dating (gah, do not even ask)… maybe I should google up scams, just in case there are new super-subtle ones.

Nope. SSDD.

New Zealand women are getting conned into accepting stolen goods and passing them along.

The old “please give money (or iPads) to these poor orphans” trick is still alive and well in Britain.

And of course we have the fake check that needs to be deposited in my account, and then real money transferred to your account fraud. Luckily this Tennessee chickie was too smart for that.

They’re not so swift in Indiana, though ~ a man gave an online dating site hustler a big wad of cash before HIS WIFE discovered what a moron he was.

This woman in Indiana sent an online criminal $150K for business expenses in Egypt. Yikes!

In Canada, women are falling for the dead uncle scam ~ I need some cash to get his overseas estate in order, and then we’ll have millions yada.

Lest you think that these scams abound only on the lesser-known dating sites, nope! Here’s an article about scammers on Match-dot-com in Britain who were brought to trial. (The messages they sent the women were so unbearably barfy!)

Here’s one that sounds new: trick men into thinking they’re chatting with an underaged girl and hit them up for “fines.” Because that’s the penalty for being a sex offender… paying a detective via Western Union.

It all sucks, and yet we continue to use dating sites, because hope lives on. Just assume everyone is lying about something because they are.

Barbed wire heart

(Funny as I searched for this image I had to acknowledge that barbed wire goes both directions.)

Chasing Amish

In my continuing mission to read a variety of romance subgenres (cowboys and dragons done and dusted), I have now turned to the Amish. Apparently this is quite a big fu… fudgy deal. Justine McDaniel gives a nice overview of the bonnet ripper phenom, which is what inspired me to check it out myself.

The other day, I downloaded four Amish romances for my Kindle (free in Kindle Unlimited, natch ~ you didn’t think I would actually pay for these, right?) and got started.

First book: Fruitful Love by Michelle Eastwood. This is possibly the worst thing I’ve ever read. There was absolutely no plot, no conflict, nothing interesting in any way, shape, or form happening in this story. The characters were boring and had zero personality, no quirks, no flaws, no shiny spots, nothing. Girl meets boy, girl gets boy, the end. WTF? Saving grace: it was super-short.

Second book: An Amish Choice by Diana Morgan. OK, here we have a real story. I liked many things about this book. The protags were surprisingly real and flawed. They were extremely relatable and could have been any religion. The hero is a good man, but speaks impulsively and hurts people’s feelings. This is a problem for him throughout. The heroine is also a good person, but sometimes bitchy and irrational. Both of them are confused and have a hard time figuring out what they really want. Just like it is, you know?

Problems with AAC include POV shifting, typos, and annoying rando paragraph indents. Writers! Use block formatting for Kindle! Indenting looks like crap, and sometimes the uploading process double indents, or otherwise screws things up. Yucky. (I may not have fixed all mine yet, so shhhh.) But these could be (and are) issues with any books and have nothing do do with Amishness.

So, I had one good experience and one bad… and I bailed on the last two. I kinda get the idea now: a lot of baking, a lot of buggying, and a smattering of German.


Sexy Amish

Down the Darkest Road

I liked this book by Tami Hoag. But it would have been so much better with a little editing. There were POV errors aplenty ~ not the dreaded head bounces, but simply things we should not have seen from a particular POV. If we are inside a character’s head, we can’t know about things they didn’t notice. It’s jarring to read “She was oblivious to _____.” If she’s oblivious to it, and we’re in her head, then we can’t know about it either!

This all could have been so easily fixed by having another character mention the necessary facts afterward. In fact, when our protag didn’t see that she nearly ran down a shopper in her haste to follow someone, the cop tells her about it when he pulls her over. That also should have been the first time the reader hears about her near miss.

Another issue for me was the nonstop harping on how rotten the protag looked because of her grief and how every moment of her life was soaked in despair. Stop telling us that! Show it and we know it. Hoag did a much better job with the protag’s daughter, showing us viscerally how miserable she was rather than saying the same thing 500 different ways.

The story itself was fascinating though. Unlike with a romance novel, I was totes unable to predict the ending to this book. It could have gone so many different ways and I could not stop reading until I found out what happened. That is the mark of a successful mystery/thriller, I have to say. I read some of Darkest Road before I went to sleep Friday night, but my entire Saturday morning was blown in my need to finish it. I had to know!

I’m on the fence about reading more Tami Hoag though. I kinda think it would be better to find a mystery writer who doesn’t make elementary POV mistakes.

One last thing: “The best predictor of future behavior is past behavior,” sez the cop in Darkest Road. It’s good to be reminded of this now and again.

Leaving November

I had some good times this month, and kicked NAH-NO’s ass, but I won’t be sorry to close the door on November in about six hours from now.

This year has sucked, though I say that with full acknowlegement I am lucky and things could have been a lot worse. Stuff is actually on the upswing now, so yay. Probably jinxed myself there. (Are we still allowed to say jinx, or does it offend some peeps who will never read my blarg?)

I’m optimistic going into the last month of 2014 and have some fun events lined up. So yay!

Re NAH-NO, I’m still very pleased with my story, though of course it is filled with redundancies and introspective glop, so I’ve begun hosing that. Down about 2K today. I figure I’ll finish up this “Part 1″ at around 40ish and then slide into Part 2/Book 2/whatever. Maybe 30ish for that, idk. Maybe more. Gotta get our hero off the magical island (after he’s tortured for a while), and that’ll be complicated, yo.

ANYWAY. It’s all good except I am in pah deficit mode. Visited my daughters on Thanksgiving, and though we are all happy to be a-trad, some things are sacred. Things like apple pah, cherry pah, pumpkin pah, etc. You get the picture.

Right now, I have Cupcake Red Velvet wine. I had no idea they made such cool-sounding wines, but I visited three wineries up north, so now I know things. Soon there will be a pic of it on my Instawhatsit. I did not know we were supposed to link our Instas on our blargs, but Don haz his linked, so now I do, too.


NAH-NO Day 29: Done

Winner 2014 NaNo

NAH-NO Day 25: Airport

Didn’t finish, but am at 47,581, so I think I can get to 50K by next Sunday even if I miss a few days on vacation.

Happy Turkeying!


NAH-NO Day 21: Hike

I’m almost at 37K words. Want to finish on Tuesday before I leave for NorCal. Will try to get to 45K by Sunday night. Not sure if that is doable, but we’ll see. Tomorrow I’m going on a hike, lolololol. It’s allegedly short and easy. Tonight I went to Target for a small backpack to carry essential things like a Clif bar, water, car keys, etc. Did not want a giant pack that could house a baby elephant. The only small one they had was hot pink for a little girl. So I got that. Plus a hat and ear-warmer headband. I’m sure I will freeze to death anyway or get bitten by a rattlesnake or fall into a ravine. But whatev.

In honor of my hike, I’m offering A Taste of Sugar for free this weekend! Woo!

If you would please poast a review for A Taste of Sugar or any Paula Light/Anna Fondant books you have read, that would be awesome. Thanks!

NAH-NO Day 19: Pot

Dayam. I fell way back yesterday ~ had been very busy at work Monday and Tuesday and just did not have any words left last night. I crashed at like 9:30PM. So sad to see my stats fall after being so good all month. No green lights. :(

But tonight I cranked out over 2000 words and am all greenlighted again!

Now, let me tell you about the pot. Don’t get excited ~ I’m talking about a pot, the kind you heat soup in. Tonight I thought, OK, before I write I will have some nice hot soup cuz I am cold. I reached into the cabinet for my pot, as you do, only to find one pot stuck inside another one (I have two about the same size). How the hell did this happen?

Honestly I think the pots were having sex in the dark cabinet because I haven’t cooked anything in them for so long. And, um, they got stuck. No seriously. I couldn’t pry them apart. Isn’t there a name for this condition? Anyway, my newer pot is actually the cheaper, crappier one, so I figured it would be the one to sacrifice, and indeed it started warping out of shape as I  yanked on the handle.

Always cognizant of how easily and stupidly I hurt myself, I got out a long two-pronged fork of destruction to help me. The fork was bending, but not actually accomplishing anything. Then BAM! The handle of the good pot broke.


See? This kind of completely bizarre and ridiculous thing only ever happens to me. Idk what to do. I guess I will throw both pots out and buy a new medium pot at Target.

Oh, I heated my soup in a little pot. That was fine. Soup was good.

This pot sitch though. Weeeeeird.

NAH-NO Day 16: Lurve

Specifically this poast from May 17, 2014: A Lurve Letter.

It’s received a shit ton of views. At first I was all, wow, people really like what I have to say. Awesomeness. But most of the views are from foreign countries. So, I investigated further and turns out that it’s the bird peeps are interested in, the Angry Bird.

Note how I am relentlessly exploiting this. Expect moar of same in future. :)

Regarding writing. I was significantly ahead of the NaNo game but am now just treading water, pleased when my bar greenlights for the day and I get November 30th as the predicted finish date. I still am having fun writing the fantasy story and only hope it sells decently when I put it on KDP. I’ve flatlined on romance novel sales and everything else I have up currently.

I think the complete book, which will be two stories, is going to have a much higher wordcount than 50K. I’m almost at 27K on the first story and have quite a bit left before we transition to part 2.

Hope everyone is having a good weekend!

Grumpy Cat